No thank you cards???

I went to a family members baby shower about 6 weeks ago, spent almost $200 on gifts and no thank you yet, I find it rude not to send a handwritten note. And in my opinion, if you have time to post on facebook, you have time and energy to write out thank-you notes. I regret spending that much on a gift and will think twice about it in the future.

Ashley, I disagree that a hand written thank you is dated. Some of the sweetest thank you notes from my nieces and nephews were hand written on a post it. I could barely read what was written but I knew time was taken out of their day (and the parent's) to do the right thing. A thank you note can cost less than .60. It's the time that people don't want to be bothered with. And that's why it irks me. I spent time shopping, wrapping, and gifting it.

Well, to me, it won't matter if the year is 3017, if i ever get word that my children (when they are adults), don't send out thank you cards, there will be smoke in the city. I don't play that and a text message does NOT suffice in my eyes. But oh well, if she sends one, great. if not, oh well. Maybe she doesn't know to do that and i should let her know for future reference and so she can teach her child that.

It takes literally nothing but $.49 postage to send a thank you card. I know what being "poor" or "broke" is like and trust me.....you can find $.50 to send a thank you card. And if you can't, i would suggest not accepting gifts. Spending $.50 on a stamp will NOT take food out of your childrens mouth. If you can't afford a $.49 stamp, maybe you (no one specific) should stop having children. Surely if you can't afford a stamp, you can't afford to raise children. I really hope this isn't coming off like i'm being super rude and insensitive but i'm just speaking facts. I have 2 children and it doesn't matter if my mother (their grandmother who is SUPER close to them) sends a gift. a thank you card is going in the mail within 48 hours after the fact. It's just the principle. and my daughter dare not send a text. My older sister supported my daughter selling girl scout cookies last month. she didn't want the cookies but sent me $50 paypal to go towards her girl scout troop. my daughter had a thank you card in the mail within 48 hours of receiving that money. it just seems like common sense to me.

There have been a few baby showers, bridal showers and yes even weddings that I haven't received thank you cards for. One person in particular didn't give either a shower or wedding thank you card. Her excuse.. she's been lazy! GTFO!!!!! This was 5 + months ago. It's been 5 days for you.. chill out!

I 100000% agree with Kathleen. Me spending my money was time consuming. I had to go to the registry, find what i thought you'd want the most and get the most use of and pay for it. My money is worked hard for....The very LEAST you can do, is hand write a note and slap a stamp on it. that will NEVER be dated. and if people think it becomes "dated", then so will purchasing gifts and that'll be my cue to stop spending my time and money.

Ashley B. Michael's has an eight pack of thank you cards for $1 whenever I see those types of sales I stock up so I don't spend much on them except postage.

OP like others are saying if you don't get a card that is rude. I know I do typically send a quick text/email when I get a present so they know it was received and then I follow up with a thank you card. Hopefully that is the situation with your friend's daughter.

Ashley, that's bullshit. Respectfully. If someone went to the trouble to think about a gift, purchase it and send it to you? The least you can do is send a thank you note. To NOT do it is entitled and rude. And blaming it on money is just ridiculous.

It's sad when getting a handwritten thank you note is an anomaly, but it is and people (well, at least me) love getting them. And it does make you stand out. I have a big box of actual notes from my couples, and I really treasure them. When I get a thank you note from another vendor or someone I helped with a ceremony or something else? I"m blown away. There is no arena where you can look so good for five minutes of work and two bucks.

The culture of 'thank you' is, sadly, dying. And that sucks.

On the sending end? I probably send out 10 thank you notes and packages a week; it's just part of the routine...to my couples, to my venues and DOC's, to other vendors.

Give her a couple more days and then let it go....and don't let it change the way YOU behave!

Although it isn't proper and thank you cards are lovely, the hand written note is fading fast. She's a millennial, this is a tech age; you should accept the fact that you even got a thank you. For a bridal shower I'm invited to, the invite said RSVP by text. It's just how things are now, it's our main communication. I'm not saying I do it or I prefer it, but at least it was done and she showed appreciation.

I write thank you notes for just about everything. It's incredibly rude not to. I went to three baby showers last year (would have been 4 but I couldn't make one) and I got ONE thank you note. So rude.

Also @Ashley- there's no excuse. We are all busy, we all have bills, we all have lives. It's that attitude of entitlement that I absolutely hate about my generation sometimes. Take the time and write a fucking thank you note for people who took the time and MONEY to give you a gift. Wow.

@MrsWrs i couldn't care less about spending my hard earned money either....but it's etiquette and i would never have been invited to an event that i should've brought a gift to and don't. even backyard 1 year old birthday parties get gifts...it's simply unacceptable. what people do with the thank you card i sent them is up to them....i sent it and wanted to let them know how appreciative i was to get whatever they sent me.

A thank you card may still be coming!

Makes me sad that the age of sending a thank you note is slowly dying. I just think it's a really nice touch. I don't personally care about receiving them but I certainly appreciate the thought behind it.

Same situation happened to me though. Wasn't able to attend a bridal shower but I sent a $50 gift and didn't get a thank you. Made me sad as this is a really good friend. Oh well though!

ETA: words

Well then, maybe we start finding giving gifts unacceptable. Because gratitude shouldn't go out of style.

But yes, five days is a little short term.....

I always send a text first to let them know that I received the gift, then I follow it up with a thank you note.

I'm big on sending thank you notes for everything, but I never expect them from others and then get annoyed and post on a thread complaining about it. Stop having expectations of others, you'll cause yourself unnecessary stress. Is it rude not to send one? Yes. But I always tell myself, "not everyone is like me."

Ladies, after reading your comments, i see that I'm being dramatic. BUT, lol i sure hope i get a thank you card in the mail. It's just the thought.

I don't send texts. I thank them for coming when they are at my event before they leave and then immediately (within 48 hours) have thank you cards in the mail. and i'm talking hand written thank you cards. also, i purchase thank you cards before ANY event i'm having because that should be a part of the budget. if you can't afford thank you cards, you shouldn't have the event.

my wedding is in 22 days and i have received several gifts from people already and literally the day after getting the gift, their thank you card was in the mail. I have 2 children, i work full time, i am in school part time, my children are in girl scouts, baseball, they both are in school which means homework time and i am planning a wedding, i live with my fiance' which technically means i have another child (lol)....."no time" is bullshit no matter what you say.

I would not think to send thank you cards for a baby shower gift. I think you are overreacting a bit. It is nice if someone does it, and I would expect it for a wedding where I am spending a lot of money, but I do not expect it in any other circumstance. I have given $100 gifts to people for graduations and baby showers and I am fine with a phone call where they just say thank you.

I like what FutureMrsG said "not everyone is like me". That's great that you always have it together to send thank you notes within 48 hours, really it is. But not everyone always has that option. I couldn't send mine within 48 hours because I flew back home the next day and immediately went to work, had grades to submit, pre-Cana to finish at my church. It's been a busy week. Maybe she has been busy. And she did acknowledge with a text so to me that shows thought. I'm sure she'll get to it. Just give her time.

Ashley, your excuse for not sending thank you notes is lame. As others have said, a card can be sent for less than $1. I am sure that the people BUYING gifts for you - many of whom probably also struggle financially - have spent more than $1 on your gift. It is simply rude to not send them a thank you card. I hope you are planning to send them for your bridal shower and wedding.

Miami, a baby shower is no different than a bridal shower, where people spend about the same amount of money. It would never be acceptable to not send thank you notes for a bridal shower, so why would a baby shower be different? Thank you cards should absolutely be sent for both of the those events.

This is not something to get excited over now. Wait a few weeks.

I must be the only one who thinks a simple thank you, whether its a THANK YOU CARD OR A TEXT OR A PHONE CALL is more than enough.

Not arguing with the ones that think otherwise. I am just trying to say that I don't care what shape/form I receive a thank you, as long as I receive one. NO THANK YOU AT ALL WOULD REALLY PUT A BAD TASTE IN MY MOUTH!!

Just skimmed through some comments - I am glad MrsWrs feels the same. That makes it two of us!

Not directed at anyone specifically, but a text, a phone call or an email will never be a handwritten note.