No response to my "will you be my bridesmaid"

I think you kinda fucked up when you mentioned her being able to afford it. You should call her back and apologize for making an assumption about her financial situation.

Give her a day or so. Then call her back and let her know there's no pressure and when you need to know by.

Give her time to answer. If she is really sensitive, she may have been overwhelmed by your offer. There may have been something big just happen and you made the right call at the wrong time. I don't think I was anything you did, so just give her a bit to get herself together and respond.

I did not say she can't afford it. I said I would understand if she couldn't due to budget or time, or if she just didn't feel comfortable doing it...

Saying that you'd understand if she couldn't commit due to budget would be taken as "I think you're broke and can't afford to be in my wedding". You may not think that's how it comes across, but that's how it comes across.

Maybe she did assume she would be maid of honor, and I do feel bad if that's he case, however it is my choice and we just met about 6 years ago for the first time. My MOH is my best friend since grade school who is like a sister to me.

Ughhh I hate drama and kinda knew she would make this about her which is why I asked ahead of time.

I actually do want her as a bridesmaid, but it would've been a problem if I asked or if I didn't ask.

I was thinking the same, perhaps she was expecting a "will you be my maid of honor" since you mentioned you guys are very close.

I'm not sure how the hell she's making it about her. Maybe she needs time to process it and is overwhelmed with emotion. Don't just assume the worst.

Like LG said, the assumption can be made regarding your statement on budget.

I'd give it a few days.

No point in speculating, OP. There's no drama until it's invited. There's like **** legit reasons that she couldn't give you an answer on the spot.

I mean it's seven months away and everyone knows bridesmaids spend alot of money. It's a fact. So you mentioning budget was just you being considerate. I wouldn't at all have assumed it was a shot at my finances.. If she was offended I would wait until tomorrow and say hey, you never called me back. I know it's alot to ask but I hope I didn't offend you.

OFGS- you just asked her. Many people need time to make that kind of decision knowing the time and money that saying yes would involve.

Give her a few days.

Just give her some time. I wouldn't reach out to her again about it. Let her collect her thoughts and feelings

I don't think you did anything wrong. If she takes offense here, it's her fault not yours. Just wait and see if she calls you back.

Just give her time. If you don't hear back in 3 days call her or text

It's even possible it didn't have anything to do with your question. Maybe her dog started puking on the rug at the same time as you called, or a suicidal friend texted asking for help, or someone had asked her the previous day to be a bridesmaid the same week...lots of possibilities. I agree that you should give her a couple of days. Maybe take her out for coffee next weekend and bring it up again, if she's local.

She called me back. Apparently she didn't know how to react as her husband wasn't included, he's very jealous and controlling and she feels it would cause problems in her marriage to walk with another man... I just listened and told her I understand.

Wow. For real??? He sounds like a hot mess. I'm really sorry for her. Can't walk with another person down the aisle?

Sounds like you made the right response. At least you know it's all about his crazy ass versus anything to do with you. Nothing you can do.

Hearing about her husband's behavior is kind of concerning. That is really over the top behavior.

Um, that's really alarming. She's afraid it would "cause problems in her marriage" if she walks down the aisle with a groomsman, as a bridesmaid?!? You should be talking to her about how controlling that is!

Yeah... he's actually a great guy other than his jealousy issues. I feel so bad for her but every marriage is different and it's her choice to be in hers.... wish there was something I could do