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MeetMrsMyers
Devoted April 2017

No Registry, (Don't need anything) need suggestions

MeetMrsMyers, on January 27, 2017 at 11:12 PM Posted in Planning 0 27

My FH and I literally have everything we could possibly need for our home. We just moved in our new home in October, and literally need nothing. I don't have a registry, so do you guys have any suggestions as how to go about having my guests donate to an animal charity of my choice in lieu of gifts? Is this considered tacky?

27 Comments

Latest activity by MeetMrsMyers, on January 29, 2017 at 12:36 AM
  • M
    Dedicated September 2017
    Mandy ·
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    I think that is awesome!! I would t find it tacky at all.

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  • Mrs. Sasswood
    Master October 2016
    Mrs. Sasswood ·
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    Forcing people to donate to a cause can be tricky. You really shouldn't be telling people what to do with their money. Don't have a registry, you'll receive a bunch of cash since that's simply what people do, then make a donation to your favorite cause afterwards. In your thank you's you can add a "We donated to our local shelter and appreciate your help!" or something of that sort.

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  • MeetMrsMyers
    Devoted April 2017
    MeetMrsMyers ·
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    Thanks! He is the type as soon as I say I need something, he's out the door to get it! I'm 41, he's 46. It's not like we are in our first home. I thought it would be great, but didn't know how to tastefully go about it?

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  • MeetMrsMyers
    Devoted April 2017
    MeetMrsMyers ·
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    Thanks @Mrs Sass. I didn't know how to go about it! I literally have zero bridal/wedding experience lol

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  • S
    Beginner May 2017
    Stephanie ·
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    I'm in the same situation! We already live together so we don't need extra plates and knives lol. We decided to not put anything as far as registering for gifts and are putting a box for cards(w/ money) out on a table at the reception. I've been to three weddings in the past two years and it's becoming more and more common for people to not register so people know to bring a card with a check

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  • MeetMrsMyers
    Devoted April 2017
    MeetMrsMyers ·
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    Yes, I agree. That's an excellent idea Smiley smile @elhpaba

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  • MeetMrsMyers
    Devoted April 2017
    MeetMrsMyers ·
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    @Steph, exactly. We don't need a toaster, blender, etc lol I don't know how I feel about leaving a box on the table though. I feel like that's like setting a tip jar out or something? Lol But then again, I hadn't thought of people gifting cash, so that poses the question. What do you do with the money people gift you? Are people using said boxes these days?

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  • Tracey
    Just Said Yes February 2017
    Tracey ·
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    Its your wedding your day, your choice! Congradulations

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  • MeetMrsMyers
    Devoted April 2017
    MeetMrsMyers ·
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    Thank you @Tracey W. Congrats to you as well. I'm getting stupid excited, but the nerves are def in full effect! Batshit Bride Brain for sure!! lol

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  • Mrs. Sasswood
    Master October 2016
    Mrs. Sasswood ·
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    MMM, H and I had a large registry. Even though I've lived on my own/with H for a total of 7 years, there were still things we wanted to upgrade (you're telling me you have a great set of knives that slice through meat like butter??) and things we wanted with the completion discount. Towel warmer is one thing I always suggest on here. However, we received just one boxed gift at our wedding. 99% of people that gifted us anything gave us a card with cash or a check. People do use the box, and while it does seem a little "gimme gimme", it's more acceptable than say a Honeyfund because it's tradition. Is it an argument that is completely infallible? No. But tradition and etiquette trumps a lot.

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  • N
    Beginner June 2017
    N/A ·
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    Registries definitely seem to be few and far between. I have seen couples request a donation to a charity like the cancer society in lieu of clinking glasses for a kiss. As well as a donation on behalf of their guests after the wedding. On one hand I feel you may want to be up front about that as some may not agree with the charity of your choice ( but it is ultimately your choice ..) More importantly though I think if anything would be tacky it would be to make it on behalf of yourselves and reep any tax benefits from it. ( Canada taxes work like that anyways)

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  • MeetMrsMyers
    Devoted April 2017
    MeetMrsMyers ·
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    @Sass yes, I thought it seemed "gimme gimme" also. But literally, we just moved into a new home, and my FH is a shopaholic and he bought all new pots, pans, dishes, Pyrex, etc lol I literally can't think of one thing for this house I need right now. @V&J I honestly hadn't even thought of reaping any tax benefits from it. I just don't need anything so to speak, so thought it would be nice for people to donate to a charity. I dunno? I have a lot to learn about weddings and wedding etiquette, with not much time left hahaha Smiley winking

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  • Helena Handbasket
    Master February 2016
    Helena Handbasket ·
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    I'm with you MMM. I'm 36 and DH is 49. If I want something for the house I buy it. The only thing I could think of when we talked about it was a margaritaville machine and I couldn't bring myself to ask anyone to buy that for us. So we didn't do a registry and got 99% cash gifts. The couple gifts we did get were super personalized and really cool

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  • MeetMrsMyers
    Devoted April 2017
    MeetMrsMyers ·
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    That's awesome! I love your screen name @ HH Smiley winking

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  • F
    Dedicated June 2017
    Future Mrs Garcia ·
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    What about upgrading ur things. U might have everything u need, but how about getting nicer and more durable things. Like a vaccum. Or nicer plates. Or maybe even better bedding. Of course it was only a suggestion the donation is also a good idea. This is ur wedding, so do as you feel comfortable. Don't worry about things seeming tackey. It's ur family and friends so they must already know ur personality and must go along with what you do.

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  • kmd0506
    Dedicated June 2017
    kmd0506 ·
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    Here is the wording we used (we are having a DW and legitimately do not want or need anything- including money as we know it will not be cheap for people to join us). We did add a link for a charity that we believe in if anyone is inclined to donate, but it is not a request to donate in lieu of a gift:

    Moving into a single condominium in XXXXX, we are going to have a hard enough time finding space for two homes worth of stuff!

    We would much rather take home the memories of you celebrating with us than any presents.

    --------

    Talk about why we picked the charity and ask that if you are inclined to give, that you donate to this charity (keeping this vague for personal reasons).

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  • JessieJackson
    Expert April 2018
    JessieJackson ·
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    I think it's great of you to choose an animal charity over a bunch of stuff you don't need! I would gladly give money to that instead of buying someone who is already well off a new toaster. I'm not sure the proper etiquette on that but personally I don't think it would be rude or tacky to post a link to your charity of choice in your website with wording like KMD suggested.

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  • OGJessieJV
    Master July 1867
    OGJessieJV ·
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    Nope, you don't tell people who to donate to. I'm super picky about where my charity money and time goes to and there are several organisations I will not donate to. If you put this on your invites, my usual $200 that goes in a card turns into monogrammed his and her tea towels.

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  • Mrs.K
    VIP June 2017
    Mrs.K ·
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    There's literally NOTHING you can upgrade? I keep telling people we registered for $40 a piece bath towels and expensive pots and pans...And a nice knife set...

    These are all things we have cheaper crappier versions of...So we don't technically NEED them...But we deff want the upgrade...

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  • MeetMrsMyers
    Devoted April 2017
    MeetMrsMyers ·
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    We literally upgraded everything as we just moved into a new 4 bedroom home in October. My fiancé is quite the chef, thankfully for me! Anything else I could have possibly imagined, I received for Christmas. Any other suggestion @MrsK? Because I wasn't exaggerating when I said we need nothing. Even down to a new generator we got during the snow storm ! Lol

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