Skip to main content

Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

A
Beginner September 2017

No one coming to wedding.

Ashley, on February 25, 2017 at 9:45 PM Posted in Planning 0 55

My fiancé are planning our destination in Colorado from texas. We gave everyone 1 year advanced noticed. People are already backing out!!! ( parents, wedding party,). We have already started paying for things but we don't want to spend thousands for a wedding no one shows up to. The whole reason we aren't eloping is because these family members feelings would have been hurt. Should we just elope?!

55 Comments

Latest activity by Christine, on January 23, 2018 at 4:52 PM
  • Heidi
    Super October 2017
    Heidi ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    If your parents and bridal party can't make it to Colorado, is it possible to just have a small elopement/wedding at home in Texas? Even just a wedding at the courthouse and nice dinner after?

    • Reply
  • August
    Expert September 2018
    August ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Is there a reason they are backing out? Are you paying for them to get there?

    • Reply
  • Melissa
    Master March 2018
    Melissa ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Just because you gave people a years notice doesn't mean it was affordable for them. Did you discuss this before making the plans and not just a "heads up"?

    • Reply
  • AlwaysMs.
    VIP May 2018
    AlwaysMs. ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Did you send STDs? Has every single person told you they are not coming?

    • Reply
  • LittleDemon
    Master November 2017
    LittleDemon ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Does everybody live in Texas so traveling to Colorado isn't exactly easy?

    • Reply
  • Swin.
    Master June 2016
    Swin. ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    You should have checked with VIPs before booking things.

    • Reply
  • SAK2SAH
    Super October 2017
    SAK2SAH ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    If you are only having a big wedding to make everyone else happy, that's the wrong reason. Do what will make you and fh happy.

    • Reply
  • FutureRand
    Master July 2017
    FutureRand ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Please come back! We have questions!

    • Reply
  • A. L.
    Master July 2017
    A. L. ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    OP come back and answer the questions.

    • Reply
  • Diamin
    Devoted March 2018
    Diamin ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Yuup ...just elope

    • Reply
  • NautiBride2018
    VIP June 2018
    NautiBride2018 ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Is everyone telling you they're not coming?

    Are you happy with doing this big wedding?

    Did you send STDs?

    OP, come back. I have questions.

    • Reply
  • Mrs. Barton
    VIP July 2017
    Mrs. Barton ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Ugh I hate when people post and ghost

    • Reply
  • M
    VIP March 2017
    Miss S. ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Lots of missing information. You gave them advance notice, but did you confirm they would be able to attend? If so, what was their reasoning to back out now? Are you sure these family members do care if you elope? Because destination wedding minus family sort of leans toward an elopement anyway.

    • Reply
  • TIFFANY
    Super July 2017
    TIFFANY ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Do what feels right for you and your FH

    • Reply
  • A
    Beginner September 2017
    Ashley ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    We're paying for our wedding solo. We arent paying for their travel. We checked with everyone VIP and they were very supportive. They all seem to be backing out because of financial reasons. Getting married in the mountains was our number 1 MUST. Are we being selfish?

    • Reply
  • Kaitlan
    Savvy May 2019
    Kaitlan ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Go find someone to marry you two in the mountains then come home for a ceremony? Could be a better compromise!

    • Reply
  • MrsCalderon
    VIP December 2016
    MrsCalderon ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    That's the thing you have to consider when planning DWs. People might not be able to make it. I know that if someone close to me was getting married somewhere far I wouldn't be able to afford it.

    • Reply
  • Pia
    Super October 2017
    Pia ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    If its your must go and havr the wedding you want. If its just the 2 of you that should cut cost.

    • Reply
  • Monique  Wilber
    Monique Wilber ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    If it's a must for you, then have your wedding in the mountains.

    You are only being selfish if you hold it against people if they don't come. They might not come for financial reasons, for work reasons (can't get time off), for school reasons, for childcare reasons, they don't want to travel, they don't want to travel to your destination, etc. It doesn't matter why. It's not convenient.

    I traveled to an out of state destination wedding last year as a guest - I had to book two airfares from California to Portland, OR; and also from Salt Lake City UT to Portland (my kid is in college). Get the flights coming and going to be approximately the same time. Rent a car. Pay for all meals - including the wedding dinner, which was a food truck epic fail, they ran out of food, wedding party ate at 6 pm and we were still waiting to be fed at 9:30, wedding ended at 10 pm. $150 for a gift. Paid for pricey hotel in a tourist area for two nights. You get the picture. It was very, very expensive, and a big headache. We took Friday off from work/college, flew on Friday, wedding was Saturday evening (and we were not invited to anything on Friday night), and flew home Sunday afternoon/evening. We were exhausted and had to go to work/school on Monday morning at 4:30 am for my hubby.

    The couple that I married, in my avatar, eloped. It was beautiful. I was the officiant; they hired a photographer and an acoustic guitarist to serenade them. It was in the mountains at a very out of the way place. I saw their cake on their cabin table.

    So you need to decide - get married in the mountains, enjoy it, and don't hold a grudge - or, have a small intimate ceremony back home and host people for a small intimate reception, possibly at a restaurant...

    Best wishes.

    • Reply
  • A
    Beginner September 2017
    Ashley ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I guess that's true. I didn't think about how pricey just getting to the Wedding would be on their end. We're paying for the reception/dinner and we're also doing a brunch. The VIPs are the ones that begged us not to elope. One being MY MOM

    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×

Related articles

WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Learn more

Groups

WeddingWire article topics