No money for wedding..idk what to do

Heyy Alexa!

Congratulations on your engagement. I understand what you are going through. When I first go engaged my fiancé and I had absolutely no money saved to have a wedding. We wanted to get married but we did not want to be in debt when we did. So we decided to wait to 2 years and a half and finally this October we will be getting married.

If you want something small that is great, all you need is the people who support you there. We ended up changing our guest count because we realized we wanted to save more money and get a house rather then have extra people there that was see every 5 years. Getting married is about the 2 of you and no one else. If you both are happy with having a court wedding then do it, have a dinner with the people who have supported you afterwards and have a great time. Or just have Dinner just you 2 and to a weekend getaway. It doesn't matters what others think. Both of you are getting married because you love each other and the vows you will both commit for the rest of your lives.

If you guys can't afford a wedding nor care for one, then forget everyone else's opinion and go for the court house wedding. It can still be a special day for you to. Maybe make a nice date out of the day. After you are married have a little picnic at the beach or park just the 2 of you. But never feel pressure to have something you don't want nor can afford. A wedding is something you should never go in debt for.

I meant can't afford*

My fiancé and I decided to have a long engagement to save up as much as we could. You could also DIY as much as you can to cut cost

Have you thought about going to the courthouse and then celebrating with your family at home or over zoom?

Hey, Alexa. I am very sorry about what you are going through at a time where you should be happy. This day is about you and your fiancé not everyone else. You can do the courthouse and maybe a backyard reception and getting the family that are EXPECTING you to have something, to contribute by cooking dishes for your reception. Also, I'm not sure where you live but maybe checking with outdoor gardens sometimes they are inexpensive. Where I live our news channel have an Azalea garden and they only charge $250 for wedding ceremonies.

Have you thought about doing a small backyard or somewhere like that for the ceremony? I had a friend who got married last year where they had a backyard ceremony and then celebrated by renting out a space at a restaurant.

Your wedding will be special. Please don't feel as though it won't. It will be special because it will be the 2 of you celebrating your union as husband and wife and the love you have for one another. Like a lot of PP's have said, a courthouse wedding which you are fine with is not a bad thing! You can get dressed up and have a nice dinner with the 2 of you afterwards. Just because you're going to the courthouse isn't the ending to any of your celebrations. You both can take the time to save up and next year have a nice big party celebrating your 1 year anniversary. if you aren't in any rush to be married, you can also save up to have an intimate wedding at a venue. It is your day and you can do what you please, just please don't feel bad and upset; it will be a special day for you both. Lots of ways to celebrate and turn it into your day with going to the court house. You both are not obligated nor do you owe your family any reasoning as to why you are choosing to have a small intimate ceremony and furthermore, they shouldn't expect that. They should respect you and your FH's wishes on how you want to plan your wedding. I'm so sad for you that they would lay that on you. That's not right.

What about a simple backyard wedding, it’s super simple and easy and cheap but I’ve seen some absolutely beautiful ones too. Plus you can make it a potluck wedding (this was popular in my family) as well so you don’t have to buy all the food! I’ve seen some absolutely gorgeous yet still cost efficient backyard weddings but in the end do what makes you and your fiancé happy ❤️

I’ve run into a similar problem and that’s why I’ve been engaged for 5 years. Your wedding should be special for you and partner. You could maybe wait till the time is better for you or plan something small like a ‘destination’ wedding that could be special for everyone.

Girl, I understand...keep this in mind for the wedding and everything else - It isnt your job or responsibility make them happy. The wedding day is about the bride and groom. So, do what you and the groom want that fits your budget. A wedding shouldnt be stressful.
Bug hugs to you!

At the end of the day it isn't about what others want or expect. Its about you both beginning a new chapter together. If you want a courthouse wedding DO IT. You don't need others approval especially when its on your dime.

I just wanted to share my story, as it might help you see a small budget is a possibility! We planned a large, extravagant wedding precovid. When we had to cancel and change our plans due to covid, we ended up getting most of our money back and opted for a small (22 person) backyard reception after an intimate church ceremony. We ended up getting a single tier, white piped icing cake for $25, bbq catering for about $500, some rentals for about $800 (tent, tables, chairs, 4 large wood squares to form a dance floor), and I ordered some decor off of ebay/DIY for about $300. I got a dress off of lulus for $75 and my husband wore a suit he already had with a new bow tie ($20). We borrowed a karaoke machine from a friend to have a microphone for toasts. It was amazing, and we still got to experience all of the classic wedding day things: toasts, cake cutting, first dance. You may not have the money to spend on something like this or this may not sound appealing to you at all, and that’s totally okay! I just wanted to share in the hopes that you might be able to have a small wedding and reception with a small group of close family and friends that wouldn’t break the bank.


I agree with others, don’t spend what you can’t afford and don’t feel pressured to make other people happy. It is YOUR day. A courthouse wedding would also be very intimate, and you could celebrate yourselves with some champagne and a lovely dinner. Getting married to your person is what matters most, and I’m sure you’ll have a beautiful day no matter which route you choose!

I'm sorry to hear your feeling down! My advice would be keep it simple and remember that it's your relationship that's special
Ceremonies are tradition and expected but really who says you have to follow?
For small and low cost, I would suggest looking into free items or anything that will be given away in your area. As you see, there's many folx getting married at all times of the year! Many of it is going to be torn down after one day anyway. See if you can take advantage of it!

Hi friend! I’m sorry to hear about your dad. I know you’re fine with a courthouse wedding (at the end of the day, it’s about you and your fiancé, nothing else) but wanting a celebration is totally fine. My uncle just got remarried this past weekend. He took his fiancé and their children to the beach and called my grandad who is an ordained minister and had him marry them via speaker phone on the beach! And when they come home, we’ll be having a small reception in celebration! So something minimal and small like that might be an option! Best wishes to you and your fiancé!

You can do a courthouse or low key wedding and host a really small event after and have it be lovely. If you have a backyard (or a nice large enough indoor space), why not ask loved ones to dress up and come over for a meal or drinks after, even if its a potluck? You may also be able to rent out a local park for a nominal fee (state and town parks will often let you reserve space for just a few hundred dollars or less). If you have a small budget you could also rent a house for a weekend and do a really nice, intimate event without spending a ton of money.

One of the reasons weddings tend to get expensive is because it is challenging to find inexpensive spaces to host a large number of people and feeding a big group can get pricey quickly. If you keep the number of guests very small, you can still have a nice event without spending a fortune. You can also do the courthouse route now and then host a party at a later date when you can more easily afford to.

I am very sorry that you are going thru this. No one should expect anything from you all, especially if they are not financially providing. I would suggest a VERY small yet nice dinner after getting married at the courthouse. Really doesn't have to be expensive.

Sending love and light your way.

GIRRRLLLL... it is your day, whatever you want you should get. Despite your family wanting something, it is not coming from their pockets. I say go to the courthouse and have a celebration afterwards!!

GOOD LUCK!! STAY STRONG!