No idea what I'm doing.

I second @Kate - see if there's a nice park pavilion you can rent nearby - then you'll already have some seating and the like. See if a local bbq place (or Italian or whatever you like, I'm in AL, so I automatically think bbq lol) can do some catering for you, as that will cut the catering costs.

You are, unfortunately, going to have to invite social units, so no way around the aunts of the invited uncles

A loan seems like a bad plan to me, but you have to do what you think - but maybe consider other ways to cut costs - for example, if you're having something between a reception and a party, then maybe you can cut some costs on centerpieces.

First thing to do though is look at (realistically) how many people you may want there - it changes your venue options.

I figured outright asking for cash was rude, like I said I have no idea. We had no intention of making registry anyway, I just want sure if that would automatically translate gifts to cash. Like I said, I'm basically a Neanderthal when it comes to this stuff. I was looking into pavilions and things and I'm leaning toward something like that. I'm probably already over thinking all off this, I think it's just because I've been to a couple slap-dash fire hall weddings and I'm really trying to have something nicer than that for the people I care about.

We're starting to put together a REALLY rough guest list, so high end is almost 60 people, but I'd like to cut that in half or more if possible. That's everyone I'm "obligated" to invite plus there spouses. I don't want a reception that large.

Cut out people who you would only invite out of obligation. If they aren't going to be someone you and FS (future spouse) are thrilled to share your wedding with, cut them off (in social units: households/couples)

Definitely don't take out a loan! My FH and I saved our tax refunds and extra bonuses we get from work. This way it's not really "costing" us anything in terms of our normal weekly income.