No bridal shower or bachelorette party in sight?

I planned my own bachelorette party with my bridesmaid. I just talking with them and they started steeping up to take care of some of the planning. Just talk to your maids about having a night out and the conversation will naturally lead to bachelorette night fun!

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That's a really good point about bridal showers - - I've been living with my fiance for over 3 years now and we own a house together... so it's definitely not necessary and I don't really need any gifts for our home. I'll probably just reach out to the bridesmaids and see if they have any suggestions for what they'd like to do & then plan it myself (with their help, I'm sure!) and plan on paying for any activities Thanks for commenting!

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Good idea!! I think I might be thinking too hard about it all. I'm just going to go the casual route and chat with them all/get suggestions from them for activities and see where everything goes from there! Thanks!

I'm in the same boat. I have six bridesmaids, 3 are my sisters and 3 are my FH sisters. My sisters are non-shalant about everything a d his sister are just ready to shine as they walk down the aisle. My one friend whose not in the wedding party was try to take over everything involved in the planning so I had to start withholding the details from her. Since everyone has their own agenda I doubt that there will be a bachelorette party or bridal shower. I think my FH will just go away the weekend before to get away from the hassle of the planning and indulge in each other, and share gifts among ourselves. Besides, it's just us two!

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I love that idea!! Maybe we will try to do something similar... even if it's just a quick little overnight getaway, staying in a nice hotel or something. I'm all about avoiding the drama as much as possible haha.

I definitely understand the disappointment. I know it’s not necessary but the idea of someone caring about you so much that they want to throw you a party is an amazing feeling. All my bridesmaids live very far from each other with 1 out of the country and my maid of honor has a super busy schedule with my family who is 6 hours away so I have been in your shoes and felt like I wasn’t going to get a party. I just tried letting it go I know everyone is busy and it won’t be the end of the world if I didn’t get one. I would suggest call up a couple of friends and tell them you want to celebrate with them before you get to busy and just go out for lunch or dinner. They might start a conversation about bachelorette and bridal shower and you can let them know that no one is planning it they might be able to do a last minute thing for you.

I'm a first time bride at 44 getting married in November. My maid of honor wanted to take me to Vegas and maybe invite some others. However, I know she doesn't have much money and I didnt want to spend a bunch of money in Vegas (too much). Our best man also wants to arrange something for him in st Louis but most of his friends are in Indy. Our solution was to suggest that we just do something when we get to the resort. Maybe it will be the night before or we will just do something the morning of the wedding since our wedding doesn't start until 5pm. The guys are doing jet skis so we will probably do the spa. No one has mentioned a shower and maybe I should feel bummed but we are not kids getting married so dont really need anything. So, I'm kind of in the same position other than my MOH at least suggesting something. You could have your mom call one of the bridesmaids and ask her if she has anything planned and suggest getting with the other girls to arrange something (if it's important to you). I'm sure everyone is thinking that someone else will arrange it or it's just not top of mind since everyone is dealing with their own lives.

Amen my friend. All you need is each other. Congratulations to you both.

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Yeah, I think it's mostly the loneliness that's gnawing at me!

Part of me is just a little bit let down because when all of my bridesmaids got married, I was there for them, helping and running errands - - don't get me wrong, I definitely wanted to help just because I love them, not because I was expecting anything in return! That would be messed up haha. But I think the fact that my wedding seems to be on the backburner for all my friends is the thing that really bums me out in contrast to when they got married... I'm just late to the marriage party, I guess haha.

I know that I'm throwing a bit of a pity party for myself by saying that haha, but it really comes down to it just being nice to be reminded that the people you care about care about you, especially when it's a big life event like this!

I'm going to chat with some of my friends and talk about getting together and see where it goes! I don't think I'm going to concern myself with a bridal shower too much - if someone wants to plan it, great! If not though, I won't be bothered. Either way though, the actual wedding day is going to be an amazing party, so I'm going to try to not stress too much!

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Exactly! And thank you - - congratulations to you as well!

View Quoted Comment Sweet🙌🙌🙌

I’m planning a co-ed Bach party camping trip for both of us - his best man, my MOH and one of my bridesmaids joining us (only one not coming). Then to include my third gal I planned a couple nights out for the girls - it’s a destination wedding so we’ll be there the week prior - doing a spa night one night and then dinner and whiskey tasting the night before the wedding. I was upset too that we didn’t have anyone do an engagement party so we took an extra long engagement moon and celebrated together in Asia. Then I was bummed because lots of girls I know are suddenly engaged and having bridal showers and no one was offering. So I’m taking it upon myself to plan all the pre-wedding parties, I don’t want to make others feel obligated to do anything and I don’t think it’s weird if I plan parties and outings for myself, especially since we’re a more introverted couple. I’m perfectly content with my choice.

I completely understand feeling the way that you do. My feelings would be hurt too if no one did these traditional things for me. You said your wedding is September 21st so maybe your shower is coming up and your gonna be surprised. There’s still time. We are doing my best friends bridal shower next weekend and and her bachelorette 2 weeks before her wedding. He wedding is Sept 28th.

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Yeah you're probably right! My fiance actually pointed that out to me earlier today - it's possible that 2 months out still feels super far away to most of our guests and friends, so I'm just going to try and sit back, work on finishing up planning and details for the wedding, and if the parties get planned, that's great! And if not, I'm going to try and not dwell on it too much haha.

I don’t think you can ask anyone to host a bridal shower.... but I definitely agree with maybe taking the lead on the bachelorette! Send out and email and see if the girls want to get together for a night to celebrate (dinner and drinks, game night, paint and sip, a vineyard, bowling and laser tag). Perhaps once you get the ball rolling, some enthusiasm will build and someone will keep the momentum on the plan building! I totally understand what you are saying though, it definitely hurts when you are hoping for a shower and bachelorette and it isn’t happening. Keep your positive attitude and make your own fun with your bachelorette ❤️

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I definitely will!! The more I think about having a bridal shower, the less I want one! I don't really need anything for my "new life" since I've been living with my fiance for over 3 years now haha, so there isn't really a point to having one! I think I'll just reach out to my bridesmaids and maybe some other friends too and just put together some sort of casual girls night!