New babies at no kids wedding

I'd let the baby come. Babies really aren't that bad. It's the toddlers you have to worry about mostly. Ha.

Most of the time, nursing infants are the exception to the no kids rule. We’re inviting kids so this hasn’t come up for me, but if I had been put in this situation when my daughter was only a few months old, I wouldn’t have gone if I was told I couldn’t bring the baby and I don’t know how my SO would have handled it.

Nursing infants are typically the exception to the “no kids” rule, and for good reason. I would absolutely allow them to bring the baby.

I'd invite the wife and new baby. Babies that tiny + the fact that it is your best man's baby are a good exception to the rule.

The baby is still too young to go without the mother for too long, so I agree with PPs. Especially if the mother is still nursing

We were planning no kids other than my 14 year old niece but were completely open to our good friend bringing their newborn since she would be nursing. I couldn't imagine telling her to leave the baby at home.

My bridesmaid will have a four month old come the day of our wedding. We are also having a no kids wedding but am totally letting her bring her new daughter. She is thinking about getting her parents a room at the hotel we’re getting married at so they can enjoy kid free but have her close by but I’m not putting any pressure on it.

In my opinion, a newborn isn't included in "no kids" since they have to be fed every few hours and a lot of new mothers don't have someone they can trust with their newborn for a 5 or 6 hour wedding.

Fair points, as infants typically are less general hassle with no running around or tantrums. I'll leave it up to her - if she didn't want to travel, that's cool. If she wants to travel and bring baby in tow, also cool. Probably won't advertise to the remaining guests ahead of time, but she can go with what she's comfortable with.

Thanks!

Just about all of the groomsmen will have very young babies come November. We sent out the invites with the intention of no kids but they are all out of state so if anyone asks we plan on first offering a list of babysitters that could stay at the hotel for the night with the kid and if they are still uncomfortable with that we would make an exception. Lucky for us, we don't have too many kids on either side of the family so there is almost 0 chance of it becoming an issue with other guests.

Infants of that age aren't toddlers who'll run around, and at that age they shouldn't be that far from a parent for long. IMO "no kids" rules shouldn't apply to babies that age.

I just don't understand why someone would want to bring their infant to a wedding... Like I don't think I would want to travel with or have my infant around so many people or even at a party all night with loud music and such... Shouldn't the baby be comfortable sleeping at home and eating in piece. Will the baby even be fully vaccinated at that point?! I would probably opt to stay home and let my husband go to the wedding without me and be the best man, but I guess give them the option of bringing the infant baby and leave the choice up to them.

View Quoted Comment That's more what I'd been wondering is whether she would even really want to come. I'd be like NOPE. Lol

I'd say either the baby comes or if the mother is comfortable leaving the baby with a grandparent that's okay too. But I think with newborns a few months old most moms helicopter and wouldn't want to do that. You never know though. I say wait til it approaches more, but be prepared to accommodate the baby coming. My one bridesmaid's son will be a year old a month or so after my wedding but she's already been in full swing of having the baby go to grandparents houses. She hasn't asked me about him, but we didn't invite kids besides family. I think they'll be fine to have a night out to have fun.

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I agree with this lol. I went to a local fair this past weekend and in the same spot I happened to look over and saw not one but TWO very very young infants. I was like ewww no why. Too many people around, too much hassle, I would never.

Nursing mothers, and any baby under 6 months at least, should not be separated for a wedding for more than the ceremony. We had so many, we plan need to have a nursery area. Then added more babies. To start with we did not know that at least in the county in NY where we married, there is an ordinance/law that babies under 15 months may not stay in an in or hotel room when parents are not in the room, with any babysitter who is not 1. Family or 2. A licensed health professional. No using hired babysitters, even if you know them, or are your regular au pair you brought with you. That is true in a few places here ( NH) locally, and for the same reason. High tourist areas, and a baby emergency can go bad very quickly with the nearest hospital 10-30 miles away. People offered to pay for their other kids babysitting in their own rooms. But we set aside a space at the venue for a portacrib nursery for 13 2 week to 15 months old babies , and 2 preschoolers with special needs do to language problems. On the same premises as parents, not only for nursing, but any possible emergency. 2 vocational nurses we paid ( my parents contribution to our wedding) and a few child care not licensed but workers in day care center. Most places, having a small room to withdraw to to nurse where it is quiet, and a person responsible for the baby during ceremony and pictures, will do. Pro sitters we hired were due to high number of such kids. We did not hear a peep from any if the babies during the 1-4 hours parents or grandparents brout them in to the general reception to visit, in the afternoon dinner portion. Then brought them back to nursery to bed down.

View Quoted Comment Nursing babies may not be a problem for people nearby. They can attend a short while. But people driving hours and hours cannot leave them home or in a hotel room with a sitter. Some babies accept being nursed anywhere, other are too distracted or upset . It is up to the parents. But for the mother, if she cannot bring a nursing baby who does not take any bottle, then she has to stay home up to a year and a half with every baby ( or however long they nurse, some over 2 years.) So someone with 3 kids in 6 years would be chained to their home. Or, provided the baby accepts it, where mommy goes, baby goes. It is hard enough getting child care for work. But the cost people want for young infants, $15-20 an hour here, is tough for 8-16 hours. Not everyone has a convenient relative who babysits their infant. Most very young babies who do not have colic, are quiet, and sleep more than half the time. They cannot leave their seat, cannot stand or walk. It is toddlers and older preschoolers who are terrorists. ( mother of 5.)

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It's my preference to think a 2 month old baby shouldn't be at a fair, just sayin. I wouldn't do it myself. Just my opinion.

I would leave the option open at this point. It should be up to the parents, and honestly you can’t say what you would do until you’ve had a child and are in that situation. Even they won’t really know until after the baby is born. My son was six months old when my sister got married, and I had to leave him home overnight with a friend. It wasn’t the worst thing ever, but each parent is different.

So if I were you, I would table the discussion. You didn’t say when she is due. Usually people don’t announce pregnancies until the second trimester, and being that your wedding is a year away, the baby could be six months old. By that time the couple could be dying for a night away! Just leave it as an open discussion and figure it out together when things get closer.

My venue is an art gallery so my "no kids" rule is strict because the venue would have required an insurance policy if I invited children, or I would've had to have it outside instead with no indoor backup plan. However, if you're not in a similar situation I would take it case by case, and this case I think it'd be fine. (Although if you're worried about a video being ruined by baby cries maybe the mom and baby could come to the reception after?)