Hi everyone, I'm just going to apologize in advance for this long post (hopefully it's not too terrible).
My fiance and I have been together since June 2015 (I was nearly 17, he was 18) and got engaged in June 2019 (I was nearly 21, he was 22). Currently, I am set to graduate with my bachelor's degree this December and (if I get into a vet school program) will have a break between December and August where I'm not in school. I value my education and giving myself the opportunity to get an education so that I can provide for myself in the future. However, this does not mean that I want to live alone and completely independently. Like many others that I know that are getting married, they have all just graduated with four-year degrees and so I feel like I am no different... like if they can do it, why can't I? My mother has different feelings about it, and she sees no point in marriage until I am completely done with school. She doesn't seem to understand the competitive nature of vet school and that I may in fact not even get in for another two or three years, or that I may not get in at all and have to choose another career. Anyway, I felt that getting married in May 2021 would be a fair, reasonable time. I have also been living with my fiance on and off (I couldn't just move in with him entirely, because I do care about my mother and I know this is incredibly difficult for her, watching her children grow up; it also wouldn't ease any of the tension between her and me).
She worries I will settle and worries that we don't know enough about "grown-up things" to get married yet. And she's right, we are lost when it comes to insurances and loans and mortgages.... but I can't help but feel like we would figure it out in time, just like so many other couples.
Her experience with marriage and with relationships, in general, have been far from ideal, so her worries are justified. But her experiences are also not guaranteed to be mine.
I just wondered what other people have gone through and if it really would be smarter to wait or if things fall into place a little easier than she makes it seem.
