My sister is dropping out

Make her grow out that hair. It’s your day right!!! Sunshine & rainbows

Yeah, you might not like her style, but you can't tell her what to do. My sister and I have completely different styles as well, but I don't care. I want my BM's to feel good about themselves, I don't want them to feel like they are less than because they think I am judging them. You asked her because you love who she is inside not her hair or lack thereof right? I mean if you can't get past it, it is best to let her bow out, but it could damage your relationship. It probably already is if she isn't returning your calls. Honestly her edgier style could really make for some interesting/beautiful photos. A lot of weddings I see featured on websites like Borrowed & Blue, Style Me Pretty etc, have something unique about them. Tattoos make for some really cool images, just something to think about.

You can’t tell anyone, even your sister, what to do with their hair or body. That’s completely a personal decision, and all you can do is support that. At the end of the day, she’s your sister. Your wedding isn’t worth ruining a relationship with her.

If she doesn’t want to be in the wedding, respect her wishes. If she does, let her be herself. All she needs to do is show up in the dress with a smile on her face. Nothing else matters.

What matters most is who is by your side, not what they look like.

I think you need to reevaluate your priorities. This is just one day, your relationship with your sister is far more important than that.

I hate to be 'harsh' about this but I think you need to put this into perspective. If your sister had a cancer diagnosis an her hair fell out and therefore shaved it, would you still be upset and not want her in your wedding because of it? Probably not. I feel like this is more about your sister saying she wouldn't do something and then turn around and did it which can be frustrating.

Also, I have a friend who just shaved her head and was in her sisters wedding. At first, her sister was upset but got over it because she felt it was more important to have her sister in the wedding than not and honestly, no one cared about her hair and their pictures looked beautiful. Good luck!

I think you should let your sister do what she wants with her hair and body. Your relationship with her should be more important than your wedding vision.

She's your sister, and she's feeling like she wants to be accepted fully for who she is. She will be absolutely beautiful when she can be who she wants to be, standing by your side with your FULL acceptance. Weddings are one day, family is forever.

If you care more about how your wedding party looks than who they are then just hire a model to stand by your side. You're guaranteed beautiful pictures. Also, if she already mentioned that she can't keep up with your demands than I guarantee that you're not being as bridechilla as you think you are.

I have 4 sisters and I couldn't imagine telling them how to live their life. I know you have a certain vision for your wedding but think about it would you rather your sister be there by your side supporting you or sitting and wishing you accepted her?

While I believe it’s her body and you shouldn’t have asked her to have hair for your one day. If you are really that shallow, buy her a wig for your one day. Hair takes forever to grow.

How disappointed she must feel that her appearance is more important to you than her hair. As others have said, growing your hair out isn't the same thing as putting on a dress. It takes a month for each half inch. You want her to feel less than her true self for 2+ months? I wouldn't want to be a part of your day, either.

This is a great point for you to change the entire dialogue with your sister.

Tell her you don't care what her hair looks like or tattoo exposure. Tell her that all you care about is she being next to you on your special day.

Pictures are only as important as the people who are in them. If she is missing, you will regret it.

I can see why she dropped out -- she was right that she couldn't live up to the expectations. The fact that she can't handle not expressing herself through her hairstyle or choice of tattoos until your wedding shows she just wasn't up to the job. You'll be better off finding a second choice MOH who will follow every your want. That's what I like out of my friends, complete submission.

This isn't okay, imo. Would you like it if she asked you to shave your head bald or get tattoos for her wedding? If not, then I think you know the answer to why she thinks you're not being supportive. And I wouldn't replace her; she's your sister. If it were me, I would let her know it's totally fine to have her hair however she wants and that it would mean a lot to you if she would be in your wedding.

I have a bridesmaid that has tons of tattoos. I will never tell her to cover them up. It's more important to me that she's there by my side then anything.

No you aren't asking her for one day. You are asking her to wear her hair a certain way for months in order to grow it to the length you want. If it is so important to you, why don't you really make it ONE DAY and buy her a nice wig?

I have bridesmaids that like to color there hair crazy colors, I did Not ask them to change that for my wedding day, but they did ask me (because they know its important to me) if I would prefer there hair to be a specific color, and I asked if they would be willing to do natural colors for the day of. (I said I would pay for it if needed) and they were more than happy to do so for me, but every group of friends are different. I would not ask to cover tattoos and suck, but I am very happy they will all have natural hair color.

PS. They are all wearing Tiffany Blue dresses, so most colors wouldn't , match anyway, and they understand that.