My mother is trying to delay the wedding

Clearly, this is more about your mom than you. She needs her house to look perfect; she needs a boyfriend.

And if this is what she always does? Guess what? She's doing it again.

So when is your mother's wedding? Because it sounds like this is what it is going to end up being...

#bridalballs

@mc4dj13

Exactly. I'm guessing this has more to do with her than me. She loves my fiance and is very excite to see me get married, but I'm sure it also carries feelings of aging, time going by, and other weird emotions! I totally understand that but she needs to be open about that instead of making nonsensical roadblocks and imaginary problems.

She's also saying she wants me to wait so that she can get a dog, because apparently if she has a young dog when the wedding is going on, everything will be ruined. She's not even thinking about A.) putting the dog in a different room or B.) having a friend take care of the dog. Again, I'm not going to delay a wedding because of a dog she doesn't own yet.

Are you serious?

I'd elope.

@Celia

Yes, I'm totally serious. This is very much her usual pattern, which is why my brother and I are going to need to speak to her about separating the rational from irrational feelings. Having a wedding with family/friends is very important to me, but she definitely needs to stop making fake roadblocks.

I totally got off the hook! I was wrong about this one, she may indeed have the bridal balls.

I have to agree with some of the others here... She may just be delaying because she doesn't want you to get married so quickly? In any case, it's her house, so ultimately it's her decision. Maybe you and your hubby-to-be should start looking for a new venue to remain in control of the timeline?

@Cindy- yep, when we talk to her I'm going to bring that up as a possibility. I don't need to have it at her house. The whole reason to do that was to save money and if a bunch of renovations are going to be more expensive than a venue, why bother?

Despite the snarky (and extremely rude) "first world problems" troll comment, we aren't made of money just bc my mom lives in a big house. It's important for us to save.

I should also mention that before I even got engaged, my mom kept telling me to do a short engagement- actually INSISTED upon it, because she was afraid a long engagement would create anxiety and more drama. And now she wants me to wait nearly 2 years. This is another reason I'm pretty sure this is coming from an irrational (but well meaning) place.

My mother tries to throw a monkey wrench in my plans often. Tell her that if not her house then somewhere else. The date is sticking and she can get on board or let you plan without her. Bridezilla or not this is not her choice or her life. You have to put a stop to the drama eventually or games will always be an issue with her. Bridal balls are not bridezilla just strength.

My heart goes out to you, you are between a rock & a hard place. Is there a way you guys can compromise? Is your FH handy & the two of you can help your mom with her concerns. I wouldn't want to throw an event at my home, if I didn't think it was up to par. Have your mother give you a list of what she wants to do; then you guys go over it together. Maybe it won't take too long to complete and you can still have on 9/7/14

@Robin

9/7 isn't even a real date for us- I just picked a random day in September. I'd be OK with a late September wedding too! But the "renovations" she's talking about could be done very quickly and in my opinion don't even need to be done. I've been to her house recently and nothing is wrong with it! She's throwing a Christmas party the size of my wedding in a few days, and for some reason renovations weren't needed for that. *shrugs*

I just wanted to thank all of you (aside from one, obviously) for helping out. I talked to my mom today and she has warmed up to the new timeline. She agreed her reasons were goofy and it seems like she's calmed down. Meanwhile, I've promised to abide by her request for a tent (since she didn't want too many people inside the house). Fair enough!