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Beginner December 2020

My grandma telling me she is getting a plus one...

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Cassandra, on December 29, 2019 at 2:44 AM

Hello everyone! Newly engaged and just starting my planning because we both agreed to do it by November 2020 (ahh!). We have been together for 3 years so we are ready. Anyway, in speaking with my grandma who is unmarried and uncommitted and prefers it that way told me "I am going to bring [best friend] as my plus one and I am just letting you know now". Her best friend is not someone I am close with, nor grew up knowing. I only met her in my early 20s. We do not plan on having a large ceremony and people will have to travel to our wedding. We plan on no kids and only allowing plus ones to people in long term relationships, married, live-in, etc. I could use some advice on how when the time comes to let my grandma know she in fact, can not bring her best friend. She is also not contributing financially and my finance and I are paying for everything.

Thanks in advance!

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26 Comments

Super September 2026
Laura · on December 30, 2019 at 4:53 PM
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I might be the odd person out, but I am not inviting anyone without a plus one and I am keeping my wedding small. I figure if they matter to me enough to make the list - then who matters to them should make the list too. I think this is a rough position to take with Grandma. And she's not bringing a cabana boy - but her bestie. I mean, if we can't be generous now - when is the right time? I say, party on Gma!
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Devoted June 2021
Theadra · on December 30, 2019 at 4:56 PM
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Like everyone else said. Its grandma! She's older and prob would want someone her age to talk to besides relatives that talk more with other relatives. (If that makes sense)
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Super October 2021
Suzie · on December 30, 2019 at 9:00 PM
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I’m all for setting people straight who invite their own plus one, however, this is your grandma, so maybe just give her a pass. She will likely appreciate having someone she feels close to sharing the day with her, and the guest will probably bring you a gift. To me this is a choose your battles situation. Draw the line with this person though lol.
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Expert February 2020
Tanyia · on January 4, 2020 at 10:57 PM
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Agreed! Now you'll have to wait if she brings it up.
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Beginner December 2020
Cassandra · on January 5, 2020 at 5:06 AM
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Update: I spoke with my grandma. I explained we pay per head and that she doesn’t get her plus one. And she was completely fine with it. So crisis averted. Now let’s hope she doesn’t try again within the next 10 months 🤞🏽
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Master October 2017
karen · on January 5, 2020 at 10:49 AM
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If she had asked, I might have agreed. To tell me, I would say absolutely not.
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