My flowergirl won't wear a dress

Ok... it is IMPOSSIBLE to find a picture of a little girl in a pant suit or a white tux...

so, these are Adults, but it gives you an idea.

I think a full out, white tux would look too boyish.

However, I think white pants with a white top, and a sash to tie it shut matching your girls would be nice.

Everything girlish??? so like a flower pin on her shirt would be a 'no-no'???

This may sound bad..but could you bribe her? lol. and let her change into pants for the reception.

I agree a bribe sounds good and let her pick the dress

No to the tux. I would try and find another FG. FG's are supposed to be cute and frilly like the bride!

I think you should find another flower girl if possible. If she won't wear a dress...then I'd find another cute little girl to take her place!

I agree with Brian also. If she was like 2, that's a different story. But she's six and more than capable following the "rules." This is your wedding (you won't see me saying this often, so I must be serious, lol), and tell her (or her parents) that you would love to have her as a part of your big day, but she'll have a wear a pretty dress for a few hours. You could even try telling her what a special honor is it to be a flower girl, and she might get a present if she's cooperative (you could leave that out if you feel like that's too much of a bribe).

Tux NEVER!!! I wouldve never thought that a 6 years old wouldnt wear a dress!!! If she doesn't wear dresses then I think you should find another girl

Hold on here... it doesn't sound like she's spoiled, just that cavan29 is trying to be considerate! From what I've read it sounds like she hasn't even asked the little girl's mom yet so who knows whether mom would make her wear a dress. At the same time, do you really want to force a little girl into a dress that then will be crabby in pics all day?

Personally, I wouldn't want my FG in a tux, but maybe if I wanted the girl badly enough, I'd do it. If you really want her and you're okay with that, go for it! It's totally up to you and it's certainly something to talk about later. Actually, if you don't have a RB yet, perhaps she could be be your "ring maiden" in a tux instead? Just another idea!

@cavan: if the little girl doesn't like the role of a flower girl, so be it - she won't be in your party. You cannot risk her throwing a tantrum or not liking something and ruining your Big Day! As much as I adore cute flower girls-they have to WANT to be in the party and WANT to be a little Princess - then everything will run smoothly. If she doesn't like that role-nothing good will come out fo the situation. Trust my experience, darling, and enjoy your wedding, even it means "no flower girl" !

Adults can not wear anything they want to a wedding, nor should a six year old. It's a good lesson to learn young, some events do have a dress code, no matter how comfy your everyday outfits are.

I haven't read earlier posts so i'm sorry if this is repeatative- but i would not put her in a tux!!!! If she wants to be in the wedding- I would definitely explain that she has to wear a dress- maybe if you sit her down and give her an ultimatum she will budge. Just tell her- we really would like you to be in our wedding and share our special time, but because it's a special occasion we REALLY need you to wear a special dress. I have a difficult 6 year old and bribery works most times. Tell her that if she wears the dress the whole night without giving a hard time you'll give her something special. It's worth a try.

I am a mother of a 5 year old girl. One thing I teach my kids is sometimes you just cannot have things your way. From the sounds of it, she would be the FG who would purposely mess up her role because she was made to do it. If there is no way her mother is going to say to her, too bad and you better behave, and just go along with this ridiculous behavior, then find another FG, I just think its is a big risk for your day. I know I am coming off mean but too many kids these days are allowed to be spoiled and it drives me nuts.

This is YOUR wedding. This is not the FMIL's wedding. This is not the 6 year old's choice to call the shots, and it sounds like she does a lot of that, tomboy or no tomboy. On one hand, I think the tux idea is cute, I'm going to date myself and say it reminds me of the wedding scene in the movie "Fried Green Tomatoes". A Flower Girl dress would not have to be too fluffy, but could be a more tailored Aline and simple to suit her simpler tastes. A dress that is more of a Junior Bridesmaid look rather than childish. That could be a compromise. The color could be the same as your wedding dress instead of the bridesmaids.

I guess it depends too on how badly you want to have a flower girl. A FG is not a must have for a wedding. If you don't have a close relationship with this child or interact with her very much, you may want to consider just how much you really want to have her in the wedding.

I think the best way to go about it is to tell the parents and FMIL your situation. You dream of a beautiful wedding with a girl dressed as a girl. If you are unable to find another girl to fit the part you could give one stipulation.

Either she wears the dress and is in the wedding or if she backs out she is not in it and has to sit with the guests. It seems fair to me. You don't need any stress from a child screaming and crying because they do not want to wear a dress.

Find a reasonably priced dress so that way whoever pays for it is not out a huge amount in case she backs out.

You don't have to have a flower girl for your wedding to be beautiful and who knows she may change her mind by then and be ultra girlie! heres hoping!

Our son refused to where his suit for my sister-in-law's wedding. It took 3 months {1x a week} of putting the suit on for 5 minutes without crying and he would get a treat. The kid had a ring pop waiting for him at the end of the aisle on the day of her wedding and right after pictures he was allowed to change! A whole lot of work, I guess it was worth it because she's family & she loves her nephew Hope it works out!

I've read this same question often enough with respect to adult bridesmaids--there are just some women and girls who do not feel comfortable in a dress. My advice would be:

1. There really isn't an issue with having her in the wedding wearing a nice pant suit. And personally, I'm a big believer in figuring out whom you want in your wedding first, and how to dress them afterward.

2. In spite of #1, you are within your rights not to select her as a flower girl based on wanting your attendants to look uniform or whatever.

So don't worry about what other people here have to say about the appropriateness of her wearing a tux. Just think about whether you and your FI want this girl to be in your wedding enough to deal with the clothing issue. No one else gets a vote.

There are a lot of pantsuit options these days for flowergirls.