My dad isn't invited to my wedding

My mom's best friends daughter refused to have her father at her wedding. The parents had divorced after finding out the father was screwing someone else in their bed. The daughter dealt beautifully and had her mom take place of the father's duties. It went over really well and I think it made it extra special for the mother.

You are all amazing and waking up and reading all of these was a great start to my day. I think I just needed to hear that I'm not the only one going through this and feeling this way! To clarify, I am not considering inviting him. That's not where my heart is. Like someone else said "it's not a family reunion." The people going to our wedding are all close to us and have been an active part in both of our lives. He hasn't even met my fiancé and my fiancé has some very strong opinions about him so it would not be a comfortable situation for anyone! My mom will be walking me down the aisle and she's very excited about it. She has raised me by herself since I was 2 and I wouldn't let anyone else have that role in my wedding. Thank you all soooo much for your kind words and support. It means so much!!

If he's not in your life, I would think it would be weird for him to be involved. It sounds like you may be sad about not having the type of father that would be involved, not that you want your dad to be there.

This is such a personal decision and you have to make the best decision for you based on your relationship. I have a decent relationship with my dad and we did all the father-daughter stuff at my wedding, but my sister got married a year after me and he wasn't invited. I'm not entirely sure he knows he has a granddaughter or that my sister's married because of decisions that he made in the past. I completely support my sister's decision.

Since I lost my dad when I was pretty young (18), how I think about it will be very different. I don't know your circumstances as to why you aren't in touch, and I'm not asking. Only you know how and why you feel how you do. Basically the choices are to move on and surround yourself with people in your life that are positive, which I always think it best....or to realize the bond and work through it at all costs because you don't get another one and he won't always be there. I would also say if you have that chance, take it. But don't let the wedding be the reason.

I maybe see my dad once or twice a year and don't really talk to him but I would have regretted not inviting him. He has a better relationship with my older sister and apparently he's not sure if he can make it to our wedding because he might not be able get a baby sitter for his adopted kids. My wedding is 6 months away, I think he has enough time to find one. It won't be that big of a deal if he doesn't make it. At least I tried. I have a step dad but we never got close so I'll be walking down the aisle alone. We also won't be having a father/daughter or mother/son dance.

My father hasn't been a part of my life either. We haven't spoken since he congratulated "my family" for my son being born six years ago. I am thinking about it a little more often than usual. But then I just think about my mom walking me down the aisles and what dance we can share together and how special the moment is going to be for her to give me away. She has been everything to me while I was growing up and still now...... so now I don't feel bad about my dad not coming and not inviting him. The most important person is already there

I haven't seen my father since I was about 7 years old. Our relationship became very difficult after that because I was a child and he kept making promises to return one day. (He left the country and never came back). I went from believing him and being broken hearted so often. It's almost like a permanent open wound that he left. That being said, I grew up and realized he was never coming back and that he is a liar and an alcoholic. We communicate through email on holidays and our respective birthdays. I told him on his last birthday that I was getting married. He did not take it well at all. But it's not my fault. I actually feel really bad for him now. I wish him nothing but the best and don't hate him. But he won't be at the wedding. 1. He probably can't re enter the country. And 2. That would be way too much for me to handle emotionally. I probably wouldn't even want him there.

So. My mother will walk me down the aisle and she will share a dance with me. And she means so much to me. I want to honor her in every way possible.

I get pretty sad about my father quite often. So I understand where you're coming from. I know I'll feel that way on my wedding day as well, but I hope it'll all pass quickly.

@amanda. I think the normal things would be appropriate, he is your dad. You don't have to dance with him, but he can still walk you down the aisle.

Op, I think you'll enjoy your wedding day more if he is not there. it's normal to be sad, but don't forget you are marrying a man who will stay with you no matter what.

My dad died when I was 13. So yeah, he won't be there. It's ok, it won't be as noticeable to anyone else as it is to you.

I didn't want any other male relatives to walk me down the aisle. So FH and I are walking down together! And it's totally fine to skip the father daughter dance, too. Most guests won't even notice it's missing.

My father passed away. So my brother will walk me down the isle. My pleasant mother is pissed and brain washed my step father. So they will most likely not attend which is fine with me.

My dad hasn't been consistent in my and my kids life. He's invited only because I love my siblings and wouldn't want them to miss me getting married. My uncle (his brother) helped raise me. My uncle will be walking me down the aisle. I'm skipping the father daughter dance. He has told family members it's like a slap in the face. But in a way I could care less. It did hurt at first thinking about him being there sharing those moments with me. But then I think back and remember that he wasn't there for me and doesn't deserve that moment with me.

My father (term used lightly) is not invited to my wedding either. I haven't talked to him in 20 years. I think it really depends on what you want. If there it is your choice to not talk to him perhaps your wedding will be better without him there. Is there a grandpa or strong male figure in your life? Otherwise, I think it's totally not a big deal to not have him there-whatever you want!

My parents adopted me but never accepted their role as parents. I basically grew up in a boarding school. My mom just passed away in January and after I attended her funeral my dad literally said that I'm not his "real daughter" so don't expect any sort of relationship. Sheez. It's sad but it's also made me that much stronger and compassionate. No matter what my FH and I will definitely adopt! Just enjoy your special day with your FH and don't focus on the negatives. Soak up all the joy and positive energy surrounding you from the people who are present and love you. ETA: autocorrect