My dad isn't invited to my wedding

My dad haven't been apart of my life since I was born but some we are trying to mend our relationship . But my brother will be walking me down the aisle and my father will be attending though . After all it's your decision what you want to do

My dad won't be at my wedding either. My mom is walking me down the aisle and sharing a dance with me. She has raised me and been there for me, not him. I was never close with him, and we haven't spoke in years.

I don't think you're too sensitive, it's a lot to digest at times. I focus on all the people in my life who wouldn't miss our wedding for the world, and have built me up over the years. It's tough, but focus on who will be there.

My father died about 10 years ago. My son will walk me down the aisle. To be fair, my father wouldn't have really participated in the traditional father/daughter stuff anyways. It wasn't our thing.

Mine probably won't. I don't mind him not being there for "those special moments" because I would feel uncomfortable with it, anyway. I couldn't imagine doing something like slow dancing with him. yuck. It is upsetting that he likely won't be there at all.

I have many brides who've either lost their father, or who have a father not in their life. I think you focus on the people who are there for you and the joy they bring to your life. In every wedding I write, there is a line after the welcome that says, 'You're the family they have inherited and the family they have chosen', and that's dead on.

But it's completely understandable that you feel a sense of loss about this, not only at your wedding but possibly at other times. Let yourself feel what you feel; no one can tell you how to feel or tell you that you're being silly or too sensitive. You're being yourself.

I have never even met my father. My mom never even told him she was pregnant. My mom married my step father when I was in my early 20s and he help me thru a lot of things in the 25 years or so he was with us and I would have loved for him to walk me down the aisle but he passed away last year so my son will be walking me down the aisle

My parents split when I was 11. From the time I was 14 to now (almost 28), I can count on one hand the amount of times I've seen him. I met up with him about 3 years ago - same story, different day, he's never going to change. I had just broken up with an ex and hadn't started dating FH yet. He has no idea that I'm getting married. When my sister got married we went through this. She skipped all the father/daughter stuff & her husband's mom had passed away so the mother/son stuff also got skipped.

I say all that to say this; we are skipping the father/daughter stuff and I will likely walk my own self down the aisle or meet my superhero mom at the end of the aisle. I have realized that him not being around has bothered me a little more than I'd like, especially since it was his choice to not be involved.

I tried to get FH to skip the mother/son dance too. But I can't take that away from them. So, while it will be glaringly obvious that the father/daughter events will be skipped, the majority of the guests know the backstory.

Mine has never been in my life so it's not like he will be missed.

I went to counseling in the past for it.

@Jessica, I don't think you're being sensitive at all...just human. My brother will be walking me down the aisle. The father hasn't ever really been apart of my life. I haven't seen him since I was 14/15 (nor talked on the phone since I was about 19). I'm now 35. I've gotten sad/even cried when I've witness the father-daughter dance or seen it in a movie...

But there's nothing I (or maybe you) can do about it...we can only really control our behavior.

I'd say try, though it may pain you at times, to be happy and bask in all the love and support you're getting (going to get) from the people who are in your life! Know that you are loved and that every single person there is on your team

And maybe you can get a special person...doesn't have to be a man...to walk you down the aisle that day...oh, and make your own special dance with that person

I wasn't going to invite my dad but watched an episode of teen mom where catelynn & Tyler invited their parents no matter the situation they went through. My mom took that and talked with me about it and told me "put the invite out there, if he goes he goes, if he doesn't it's on him, but I don't want you looking back and thinking I should have invited him." So he's invited, BUT mom is walking me down the aisle and he is FULLY aware of that and is actually not hurt as he knows when he walked out of my life 17+ years ago, that mom became mom and dad. When he first moved he didn't call for about 2 years, then I started to see him every so often, then he moved back up here and seen him a bit more then he moved back to Florida so it was just phone calls every so often and that's how it's been since. You have to do what you want to do, not what others are telling you to do. If you feel you want to extend the invite to make yourself feel less stressed, extend it and leave the ball in his court. Good luck and don't stress it too much. Hugs!

Exactly what Ashley C said. If you have some sort of communication with him, I'd say send him and invite- at least he knows, if he dont go its on him, not you.

Virtual hug!

So I get your frustration, but for a different reason. My dad Is still in my life, but he has come out as transgendered in the last 5 years. Now he is fully transitioned, and I struggle with the traditional aspects of a wedding and if they are appropriate

I haven't spoken to my father in about 7 years and have no interest in changing that. Yes it's sad that a portion of my once close family will not be included but at the end of the day you have to do what's right for you. Not having toxic people in my life is important to me so there is no reason I would include them and their toxic behaviors in my wedding.

I don't have a relationship with my father either. My brother and I are extremely close and he will be walking me down the isle and dancing with me too. I think you should pick someone important to you that you'd love yo share that moment with. I get sad about my fathers absence sometimes too but just try to focus on the great things happening around you like your wedding, FH, and all he people that love you.

It would be very brave of you to reach out to him, especially if this is on your heart. Plus, it's important to keep in touch with family bc you never know what life will bring everyone's way. For instance, what if someone needs a life saving bone marrow transplant as you grow your family it's something to keep in mind. Sorry, I went off on a nurse tangent.

I haven't spoken to mine in several years. I'm unsure if he knows I am engaged, but I'll be sending an invite. He certainly will not have a part in the ceremony, and I honestly don't expect him to show up.

My dad left when I was 10. We stayed in contact, and when I was 18 I moved to pa to get to know him better. It was terrible. Didn't speak for 5 years. He saw on fb that I was engaged and reached out. We talk about once a month. I told him that I want inviting him to the wedding because it wasn't appropriate. My wedding isn't a family reunion and that there is still a lot of work on rebuilding our relationship before I can allow him in my life.

Everyone has their own situation. It is solely your decision.

My mom is walking me down the isle and we are having a mommy daughter dance.

If I had a situation like this I might be a bit concerned that my errant Dad could show up and make a scene. I 'd give the hotel/ venue a head's up just in case.

My father wasn't there. I cut all all contact with my mother over 20 years ago, and my father wouldn't come without my mother.

Just remember, following tradition is fine if it works for you, but is just silly if it makes your day more stressful. As far as the father-daughter dance goes, for example, you could dance with someone else--mother, sibling, whatever. Or you could forego that tradition altogether. If you have the kind of friends who would ask, "Where's the father-daughter dance?" when they haven't seen your father there, don't invite them.