My brother died yesterday, and our wedding is in a month. It feels wrong to have a party so soon…..

I am so sorry for your loss.

i hear what you are saying - it makes sense to have that thought process like "shouldn't i be grieving?" you are allowed a reprieve from grief even if it's a month after. i would go through with the wedding. that's what life is - we have happy moments, sad moments, times of grief, etc and they are not all linear, they intermingle sometimes.

you can have some kind of memorial table or something in your ceremony/reception to remember your brother and other loved ones past too.

What Melle said.

I am sorry for your loss. Memories of your wedding will always have an air of sadness attached, but will also include gratitude, peace and recognition of how you and yours gathered for both loss and continuation of life.

Be gentle with each other... respect all decisions of those close to the situation and take care of yourself.

I’m so sorry for your loss. I would continue and like they said have a memorial table or something during the ceremony or both. Your brother would have probably wanted you to continue and have your special day. Everyone should understand and at the end of the day it is your decision.

I agree with everyone above. Your brother would’ve wanted you to continue on. If it makes you feel better try to find a way to honor him at your wedding. I can’t imagine how hard this is but like melle said, this is just life. It’s okay to have a reprieve from grief. That doesn’t mean you’re forgetting your brother

I’m so sorry for your loss. I agree with all of the others in saying keep the wedding on. It’s hard to make a decision like this when you’re still taking it all in & making arrangements for his funeral. Incorporate something to remember him. You can have a memorial table for him & other loved ones. My mom passed away 9 years ago but my plan is to put a picture of her on a chair to save a seat for her. We are also having a memorial table for other relatives we lost.

SO sorry for your loss. If you feel it, go on. Your brother would have wanted your happiness.

My father died 10 years ago, and still burns, still is sad he cannot see me in the special day.

You go on. Having a memorial or a dedicated chair as other gals suggested is a nice gesture.

I think the memorial table idea is sweet, but definitely a "know your crowd" thing, only a month after he passed, some people may get overwhelmed and emotional at it and make the whole day sad as a result, while others feel it's touching and a sweet thing. If your crowd is the type to have sad reaction, maybe something more subtle (like a rose on a chair but no specification) and a locket on your bouquet with his picture. Otherwise the memorial table/picture on his chair is a sweet tribute.

In terms of still having the wedding, one of my close friends, her husbands father passed away a week before the wedding. They decided to still have the wedding as he would have wanted them to celebrate their love and life together. They had the funeral service on the thursday, and the wedding was saturday. She said it was a lot emotionally but they wouldn't have changed it. They had a moment of silence in their ceremony for him. They did not put anything special out because they didn't want to overwhelm people with sadness. Her father gave a mention to him in his speech for the couple at the reception. Other than that, they tried to make it a happy occasion after the week of sadness, knowing that people were still grieving and would be for a long time, but wanting to have a bright spot amidst the darkness

I am so sorry for your loss. I know that this recent loss will certainly add a twinge of sadness to your wedding, but I don’t think there’s anything wrong at all about continuing to have it. If it feels appropriate and it’s something you would like to do, you could always find a way to pay tribute to him (a memorial table or toast, etc.) as other people said. Your brother loved you and I know he’d want you to be happy and to enjoy your wedding day.


Again, I’m so sorry for your loss, but wishing you well for your wedding- God bless you in this trying and joyous time 💕

Hi dear I am so sorry for your lost my best friend, cousin passsed away suddenly last May 2021 …. 6 weeks after I got engaged and the support system lacked broke in so many ways I don’t even know how to begin with the stress it has caused upon me… since most of our guests are flying in from all over the country and we are a Covid couple meaning we didn’t get the exact chance that most other couples may take for granted for example simple pleasures of life/dating/getting to know each other something as simple as getting to go on dates at a restaurant and learning what favorite dessert item he or she has etc.. so that way it doesn’t complicate these things in case for a future engagement if a wedding cake decision shall ever happen (happy to provide examples) instead it was completely miserable wheras very few people called or cared to congratulate us and due to the sudden death of my closest family member and best friend those people then seemed to not know what to say to me first… my wedding is happening a year and a month after her death as we want to give people a chance to come around … in Judaism religion no celebration can happen for one year post a family member/friends death … and a year and a month felt appropriate.

I’m so sorry for your loss. Similar but not so similar situation: my fiancé’s grandfather passed away a few weeks before my bridal shower. That meant my fiancé’s grandma and mother would be grieving and I definitely wanted them there. They both wanted to be there though to take their mind off of the sadness and grief. It was a joyous day despite his passing a few weeks prior.



Best of luck in your decision

First I'm sorry for your lost prayers for you and your family.But you did all that you were able to do it was your brother's choice also I'm sure that he tried his best to,but he didnt want to try anymore. You helped him as much as you could and no sweetheart do feel guilty because you didn't know that this was going to happen. And your are helping out again with his arrangements and making sure that he is sent to heaven right.Your can remember him at your ceremony with a prayer and you have sent out invitations and paid money on your wedding day. Also family members are all coming in from all over this can also celebration and I really think that he would want you to postpone your day. God has him now and he is feeling better you may not understand what I am saying but I have lost ppl that way. I wish you comfort and blessing with all my heart

I am so sorry for your loss! My first instinct tells me that the best thing to do is to continue with your wedding, but definitely include a tribute for your brother. It's what he would want. Now would an entire table be necessary? Maybe not. Someone else mentioned knowing your crowd. I fear that if you draw too much attention, it will cast too dark a shadow over the entire day. That being said, maybe you could have a rose in an empty chair for him and then have your officiant mention something in your vows.

I’m so sorry for your loss … You do what you think is best …BUT I think you should still get married and possibly do something in his honor. My brother passed away a long time ago now, he also died from an overdose when he was 18 years old back in 2011. I made this sign to hang on an empty chair for him and I’m going to get a nice picture frame and add his picture to it to set on the chair as well.

Hello Avery my condolences to you and your family and understand your grief. You need to still go through the wedding reasons are that it's a little to late to cancel with it begin 30 days away. And I completely understand that you are mourning right now but he wouldn't want you to postpone your wedding. You can then have the time that you need. Sending out prayers and healing to get you thru.

I'm curious, how did you end up handling the situation? I hope you found a solution that felt right for you and your loved ones.