On Easter a conversation about how literally anybody could get ordained was started, and my future mother in law made a comment about marrying us.. we were all like hey why not! In a joking way. Fiancé and I both got a text this morning from his mom saying she went online and is now ordained to officiate our wedding ceremony. And that she’s honored that we want her to do it. I was literally speechless and she caught us so off guard. Aside from the fact that she went ahead and actually did it without seriously talking to us about it, is it weird for her to do it?
Do you and fiance want her to do this? If you want her to then it's not weird, but many don't spring that as a surprise. Also research your state laws because some states recognize online ordinations and others do not.
It sounds like the fact that you were joking wasn't clear to your FMIL, and from what you describe I don't think she's overstepping, I think she was simply following through a request she thought you made. If the question is was it weird for her to get ordained without you formally proposing it to her or having a serious conversation, I think it just depends on the type of relationship you have, and in general I think requests like this are often made casually. I don't think its weird to be married by a relative at all.
However, your parents or other close family members may feel slighted as to why you asked your FMIL and not them, so I would consider how to navigate that dynamic if you do decide to have your FMIL marry you.
I think it was weird of her to do that but not everyone may think the same way I do. Its one thing to lightly bring it up in conversation and it’s another to have a serious conversation and get a confirmed Yes, you will be our officiant. Im the type of person that if I was your MIL I might bring it up to hear your thoughts, but then I will ask again to talk deeper about it and get a confirmed yes or no. She jumped the gun and got ordained without fully confirming with you and thats going to make it harder to say no. Dont get me wrong of course you can still say no but she may get hurt feelings because she got ordained for nothing. Talk to your FH. Do you really want her to marry you? Or do you have someone else in mind? Then have a serious conversation w her.
My BIL is ordained and he wanted to marry us, me and FH said to each other thats a hard no. Hes not that cool w his brother and I already picked a pastor who would marry us since the ceremony is in a church.
I had a talk with my fiancé before we made any decisions. We are having my aunt do it as she is an ordained pastor at our church. If she wasn't ordained we would have someone else do it. I wanted to make sure though with my fiancé that it was good with him. We are trying to save a lot of money by having friends and family helping as much as possible.
No not at all. I know many people who had family members get certified online and married them. We are having a family friend marry us. But I do recommend making sure if you go that route that she is good with public speaking and that you guys look up all the information that goes into getting married.
I mean was it weird that she went ahead and got ordained and assumed she 100% was going to marry you? Yeah kinda, but I don't think her doing so was overstepping or anything! It sounds like you joking didn't come across as that way to her and she jumped the gun. If you and your FH are fine with her officiating, then great, but if not, then you both need to let her know that. Other than that, it's a great thing! It's nice that she's wanting to do so, and it also saved you a lot of money.
We're having our close friend marry us! He'll do the same thing and get ordained online!
Its up to you really... i think its very sweet that she wants to do that and i know alot of people who have had family members or close friends get ordained so they could perform the wedding. As long as she is not one of those people who feel the need to make things all about them... i woudl say go from it