Mom wants me to change wedding day

I would be devastated to not have my mom at my wedding. Can she not change her trip plans? How far out is the wedding? Have you sent invitations already? If it's still months away, your venue should be flexible and let you change the date.

View Quoted Comment Yeah, unfortunately it’s a very expensive trip that has been planned for years I guess. The venue is fairly flexible, though i live in an area where there is like a 2 week spurt of perfect outdoor wedding weather, and she’ll be gone during those two weeks lol. Before, it’s too hot & after it’s too cold/chance of rain. Thanks for your input, I think I’m just going to have to suck it up & take my chances with the weather on a new date bc i really can’t imagine her not being there.

It shows that you are getting married this June? If so, that is a pretty tall order to ask you to change your date with all that goes into planning a wedding (cost, vendor scheduling, etc.) vs. a trip. Plus, with many brides rescheduling/ booking into 2022, it could be difficult finding another date. I am sorry you have this extra stress put on you!

View Quoted Comment I'm so sorry, this is an awful situation. Unfortunately it just requires deciding which will make you happier - perfect weather, or your mom present. Sending you all the good weather vibes!

View Quoted Comment Thank you this is so sweet!

View Quoted Comment We’re actually having our wedding in October! I haven’t updated my wedding wire app haha. But yes, I guess Im just trying to see like, am I wrong to wanna keep the date & ask her to reschedule her trip (that may not even happen bc it’s in a diff country and who knows what covid is like there)? I just don’t wanna make the wrong decision; sacrificing potentially nice weather on my wedding day and have my mom there or having nice weather but not have my mom there. Ugh!

She should change her trip.

She should double checked the date of the trip. If the weather is only available a certain time, then you have to decide if you want a wedding without in the pretty weather or with her at an indoor space.

I think she should change her trip. I know my mom would change or even cancel a trip if it meant being there for my wedding. I can't imagine a mother choosing a trip over their daughter's wedding.

I think she should reschedule her trip

Can’t she just reschedule her trip? I can’t imagine my mother choosing a trip over my wedding! I would tell her that you are unable to change your date and would be very hurt if she did not attend.

I would have her change her trip.

Given that her trip is in another country, there is a very good chance her trip will end up being canceled, but I would talk to her and explain that you really don't want to move your wedding date and because of Covid finding a new date might not be easy because a lot of venues are already booked for dates in 2021 and 2022.

Sorry you’re in this situation. I know you don’t wanna make the “wrong” decision, but you do have to do what feels right for you and your FH. It sounds like this date is something important to you. Maybe talk with your mom about rescheduling the trip. With covid, a lot of things are even more difficult with rescheduling. I hope she’s able to reschedule.

I just went through a similar thing (mom confirmed she was free on my wedding date, but then realized she had plans that were scheduled months/years prior). She really wanted me to change the date, but I ended up not changing my date because it's a big lift to re-schedule the venue, vendors, and inform everyone else. I get it's also a big lift to change vacation dates, but a wedding is more important than a vacation, it doesn't matter when the vacation was planned or where she's going. The reason I'm telling you my story is because I told my fiance's parents about the date issue, and they told me if they had a vacation planned on the date we wanted to get married, they would change the vacation without even telling us because they wouldn't want us to feel guilty or stressed about it... because a wedding is so important. It turns out we accidentally picked the same date as a significant cultural holiday for them, and they didn't even mention it. They just automatically decided to celebrate the holiday the weekend after.