MOH ?: is she or did she plan your bachelorette party?

Of course you aren't supposed to expect it, but I understand that it does sting a bit when it doesn't even occur to them. Probably more when they really push to be MOH, but it becomes clear it's not because they want to do those things for you, they just want feel like the next most important person. Have you talked to her to see if she has personal stuff going on? Sometimes they are having personal stuff happening in their life that has nothing to do with you at all. Otherwise, it sounds like her motivations to be MOH are a little off. Not that the only reason you would want to be MOH is to plan a bunch of stuff... you get what I meant though.

MOH usually helps plan both and often, the other BMs help too. Are the other BMs helping plan/contribute anything? I see you mentioned your FSIL planned the bachelorette...have any other BMs helped her? I'm surprised your sister wanted to be your MOH so much if she doesn't actually want to do anything. My MOH is excited to plan both the shower and bachelorette, and the rest of my BMs started talking about what to do for the bachelorette as soon as I asked them to be BMs. Regardless of what your sister does or doesn't contribute, I hope you still have a fun bachelorette party!

The MOH and BM's all planned together and split the cost evenly!

I'm not having an MOH and I don't want a shower or Bachlorette. In our circles it's usually the MOB who hosts the shower (hell no in my case) and the BP plans the Bachlorette as a whole.

As for the Make-up artist for your wedding, it's not up to you to judge what your sister spends her money on. Maybe no one asked her what her budget was for the Bachlorette, and she didn't say that she wouldn't spend money on you, just not on the other girls, which I don't blame her.

My MOH is planning the bachelorette weekend - she jumped right in and did it but we are older and have been friends forever and she is a planner type. I kept saying I didn't need one since this is my second marriage but I am excited now that it's almost here. Who wouldn't love a weekend at the beach?

How much would she have to pay? I don't agree that everyone had to pay for the bride and spend a ton of money, so she might be like me.

I happy to have a Matron of Honor and a Maid of Honor. My SIL (brothers wife) and only sister. They are planning both and have been a huge help. I hope it gets better for you

Why aren't your other BM stepping up? Your sister sounds like an ass. If I were in a wedding and the MOH wasn't doing anything, I would step up and organize it myself. My little sister is my MOH and has organized an entire beach weekend for my bachelorette- and she lives in NY (so she's doing it remotely) and is only 22. There's no excuse.

Yes, my Moh/twin is planning our double bach party.

ETA: When my sister got married (she planned a wedding in 2 weeks), I was her MoH and didn't know anything about showers or Bach parties, so she didn't have one! I did apologize to her when I found out though!

My MOH is a hot mess.... so one of my bridesmaids planned my shower and bachelorette party, although neither have happened yet (next month). It all came together pretty last minute, I wasn't sure they were going to do anything, but I am glad they are. It's not required but it is a nice feeling to have some fun get-togethers.

I do feel awkward about the paying part. I do not understand why it's customary for the BP to pay for the bride on the bachelorette.... I really don't mind paying for my own food/drinks. I would any other time, so why not this?! lol... I'll probably insist on paying for myself just because I don't like other people buying me stuff. Especially cause I drink like a fish and have expensive taste haha

My MOH is helping my mother plan the shower, and she is organizing my bach party with the other bridesmaids. I didn't assume she would but she jumped in and started planning. I was her MOH for her wedding and I planned her bach party and helped her mother and the other BM's plan the shower. It shouldn't be assumed I guess, but I wouldn't want someone as my MOH that wouldn't be happy and willing to help me navigate and plan these events. Isn't that the point of a bridal party, they help you? If their role was only to show and and look pretty I wouldn't have a bridal party to begin with. These ladies are my support system!

Also, they told me straight up that I am not paying a dime for either. So I'm buying them all nice gifts and have a few other surprises for them on the day of each party, to show my gratitude.

My MOH (also my sister) claims she is throwing one for me, but she hasn't made a single plan yet.

My MOH lives in Boston and I live in California and she is still planning both a shower and a bachelorette party for me. All the BM's are pitching in so that I will not have to pay for anything.