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Just Said Yes September 2017

Military Base Wedding Access for Non US citizens

Jena, on August 22, 2017 at 12:51 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 89

So, I've got quite a sensitive issue to discuss with my guests. Because we are holding our wedding on a Navy base, we need to submit everyone's names in advance for access. Foreign visitors require quite a bit more information than domestic visitors. My FH is a first generation American, and has many family members not originally born in the US. Can anyone help think of a polite way to ask family and friends if they are US citizens, or if they have a green card? I don't want to offend anyone, but it may mean they can't come to they wedding if I don't get the correct information!

89 Comments

Latest activity by Lynnie, on August 23, 2017 at 12:55 PM
  • MrsSki
    Master April 2017
    MrsSki ·
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    Immigration status is incredibly personal question, especially in today's political climate. I feel like asking for someone's immigration status is like asking someone what they make.

    Personally, I'd rethink my venue if I were you. Is your wedding date really 9/16/17 and you're just considering this now?!

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  • The Trap Selena
    Master March 2016
    The Trap Selena ·
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    I think that considering the current political climate of this country, you're going to offend people. I don't think there's a way around it.

    ETA: Jinx @Ski

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  • K.M.
    Master September 2018
    K.M. ·
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    I agree with LG. That's an extremely personal topic and people may feel uncomfortable sharing that information with you. I think it would be best to re think your venue.

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  • Betsy
    Devoted November 2018
    Betsy ·
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    Man that's a no are you able to change venue ?

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  • LovroftheArts
    Devoted April 2018
    LovroftheArts ·
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    Do you know if every single one of your FH's family is a documented citizen or resident? Cause you could be putting them in a very dangerous position if not or if you're not sure...

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  • D
    Devoted July 2017
    dedodara ·
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    It looks like your wedding it right around the corner, so you'd be unable to change your venue. Is it clear on your wedding invitations that the wedding is being held on a military base? I would hope people would understand that a wedding on a military base is going to require extra information. I think you should have put something in your invitations, but alas, it is probably too late for that now. I would suggest just explaining the situation and asking everyone for the required information. Just say, if you are a U.S. citizen, I need this information. If you are not a U.S. citizen, I need this other information. If you are uncomfortable providing this information, we completely understand and we will miss you at the wedding, and apologize for not informing you sooner. I think that's the best you can do given how close you are to your date.

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  • Ariella
    Super March 2018
    Ariella ·
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    Hmmmm maybe with the invite you should have sent out a list of what is needed and/or FAQ. That will allow people to read it over and decide for themselves whether they are capable of going without them having to fully announce to you their status.

    I might still be offended in the sense that this venue was chosen despite knowing the state of our country and the situation with his family. Is there a reason why that has to be the venue? I don't know much about bases but, is he not allowed to leave?

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  • Letti Hernandez
    Letti Hernandez ·
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    Basically they want the same information required for boarding an airplane. I think all states are compliant with the "REAL ID" driver's license now with the exception of IL and CA I think. Those in IL or CA sometime this fall I believe will no longer be able to board a plane without a passport card or passport if they are not compliant by that time which I doubt they will be. Anyone who can not prove a "REAL ID" or passport will not be able to get on base. They should have told you this when you booked on base.

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  • Mrs. Sponge
    Master April 2018
    Mrs. Sponge ·
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    If you explain that the venue is on a military base I think people should be understanding. I get it's a sensitive subject but it's like that for the safety of the people on the base. I don't think you should have to change your venue because people will have to provide certain information to get there.

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  • Annie
    VIP October 2018
    Annie ·
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    @Letti H- PA & SC are also non-compliant. As of Oct PA residents might not be able to get onto military bases without our passports, and January 2018 for possible flights. Homeland Security has been issuing PA, at least, extensions since we are becoming compliant.

    I think your guest list will be understanding about immigration status info since it's mainly family and friends. People are petty if they get upset over that knowing your wedding is happening on a military base.

    eta: grammar

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  • J
    Just Said Yes September 2017
    Jena ·
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    Hi All,

    Thanks for the feedback! I know a bunch of people have suggested I move the venue but, indeed, I am a little over 3 weeks out from the big day. So changing the venue is not an option. I was originally told something similar to what Letti was saying. That we would only need first and last names, and all guests would need to provide a drivers license or other form of identification. I was only given the additional requirements for foreign nationals after the invitations were already sent out! We love the military base location because of its incredible water view, and its ties to both of us being from military families (my FH is retired Navy). We are definitely disappointed with this extra requirement. Hopefully, since everyone knows it is on a military base, people will understand, as long as we explain it is definitely not our requirement!!!

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  • Lynnie
    WeddingWire Administrator October 2016
    Lynnie ·
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    Hi Jena! Can you email all of your guests with this additional information for non US citizens? I think the easiest way would be to share this info with your entire guest list, and then guests can individually reach out to you with the necessary information. I think dedodara nailed it!

    I'd also have your fiance take the lead on required documents with his family members!

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  • Nicole
    Super November 2017
    Nicole ·
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    Big no-no

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  • BecomingMrsOz
    VIP November 2017
    BecomingMrsOz ·
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    At this point, since it's too late to change the venue, your only option is to call and ask for the info.

    We are also having our ceremony on base. Every service handles things a little differently and it can even vary from base to base. Ours requires full name, DOB, citizenship status, and drivers license number, 3 weeks prior to the wedding. They should have told you all of the requirements up front, but even though they haven't there's nothing you can do. Unfortunately, you have some people who will not be able to attend.

    A note on RealID: the announcement for this, just came out on our post (I work on base as a civil servant). I called the security forces office and asked specifically if people from non-RealID states, need to bring their passports. I was told, as long as they are on the EAL, they're good to go.

    ETA: grammar

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  • Casey
    Devoted October 2017
    Casey ·
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    Ridiculous that anyone would be offended by this. What rational person would assume they could attend an event on a foreign military installation without having to answer some questions and provide some documentation of their citizenship?

    Hell, I'm an American citizen, my fiance is a colonel in the Air Force, and I can't even get on the base where he works without him calling in a visitor pass, which I then have to stop and pick up outside the gate AFTER having my picture taken and answering questions about why I'm there and when I'll be leaving. It's not new. It's not just for non-citizens. And it's not that big of a deal.

    P.S. Worry more about being honest than polite. If you tell them they need to provide additional info to be granted access to the base, they may ask why, but they'll likely understand and tell you what you need to know. If you ask about their citizenship status, they're going to wonder what in the world you're up to.

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  • A. L.
    Master July 2017
    A. L. ·
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    " What rational person would assume they could attend an event on a foreign military installation without having to answer some questions and provide some documentation of their citizenship? "

    As a non-military person, it never would have occurred to me that I would need ID for any wedding.

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  • K.M.
    Master September 2018
    K.M. ·
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    Same as ALC

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  • Mrs. Sponge
    Master April 2018
    Mrs. Sponge ·
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    Does anybody honestly think that just anybody can walk on to a military base unquestioned? You shouldn't have to be in the military to use some common sense and realize that you can't show up at a military base without proper credentials and just assume they are going to let you on. This should not offend anybody and if it does that sounds like their problem not yours.

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  • Mrs. Sponge
    Master April 2018
    Mrs. Sponge ·
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    To enter a military base? Yes it is.

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  • A. L.
    Master July 2017
    A. L. ·
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    Shauna, I've never been on or near one.

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