Masks During Ceremony

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I think that you should let her do whatever makes her comfortable. You chose this person to be a part of your wedding for a reason and that reason shouldn’t change because she is concerned about the pandemic and wants to wear a mask. I know we all want a perfect day but I would want the people who mean the most to me standing beside me masks and all more than I want mask-free photos but that’s just my opinion.
As far as lodging I would give the option to stay separate if everyone else feels strongly about not wearing masks that way you still consider her feelings and concerns

View Quoted Comment We have a cabin for all the bridal party and the girls are in one and guys in the other. She wants all the girls to wear a mask whenever we are all together in the cabin.

Unfortunately this is our current reality and one of the downsides of getting married during a pandemic. It's not going to be exactly as you envisioned it even though you're in a low risk area. What's more important, your best friends comfort and health or your wedding photos? I understand wanting them to be perfect but you're essentially saying pictures are more important than your relationship.

To answer your question directly: Yes, it’s unreasonable of you. You should encourage all guests to do whatever makes them feel safest during this time.

View Quoted Comment I agree-I put it out there to our wedding party as well. No hard feelings-I know this is a weird time. If you want to step down you can!

Considering the fact that I know four people who have gotten Carona and of the four one passed away - I would say let her wear the mask. I’m sure you can have a mask made out of the same material as the dress. The last thing you want is being the reason why she caught covid.

I’d personally allow her to wear the mask the entire time. In the grand scheme of life, it is such a minor detail. The photos will be in a wedding album, yes, but couples typically only display large photos of themselves. Concerning the cabin, she cannot dictate what the others wear. If she is uncomfortable with others not wearing masks in the cabin, she can wear an N95 mask that would protect her from the virus or find other accommodations.

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Yeah that's not reasonable of her, definitely say no to that

View Quoted Comment I agree. Everyone else is paying for the cabin too and comfortable with no mask. Since she’s the outlier it is only fair she be the one that bears the inconvenience of separate accommodations for herself.


Maybe if she visits the cabin for a set amount of time that is maybe something everyone can agree to.

I understand where you are coming from. But if I was you I'd just let her wear it. And if you don't want the mask in the pictures then maybe consider not having her in the formal picture. Or maybe even consider not having her as a bridesmaid at all. I'm not wearing a mask during my ceremony and some of my pictures, but if my bridesmaids want to wear one I'm not going to stop them. We are going to have some pictures with the mask on. I think it would be cool cause it's something we can tell are kids about and show them the pictures with us wearing the mask.

View Quoted Comment If she doesn't feel comfortable not wearing a mask and the only one uncomfortable being around everyone who's not wearing a mask in a cabin, and trying to dictate everyone else into wearing a mask in the cabin then she needs to pay for her own cabin and separate herself from the rest of the party. I don't know to me she sounds like more trouble than she's worth having in the bridal party. I'd probably get rid of her and tell her that you don't want her being uncomfortable the whole time and telling everyone what to do and since everyone else including you are not going to be wearing the mask that it would be best if she wasn't in the bridal party anymore.

Tell her she’s free to wear a mask at all times, but it means she will sacrifice being in your wedding photos. Leave the decision to her. Your photos are about YOU, anyway.

Can you guys get on the phone and have an honest and open conversation on how to make this work? For example, if you can put her at the very end of your wedding party during ceremony maybe she’ll be comfortable keeping 6ft distance from the next bridesmaid and then removing her mask for ceremony only.


I don’t think she’s being unreasonable laying out her terms that would make her comfortable staying in the cabin. Thing is, if the others aren’t willing to agree and it’s reasonable for her to find her own accommodations (for all I know you’re getting married in the middle of nowhere and there is no other room for her to reserve or you’re in the heart of a city and she can stay wherever) then she should do it. There is NO WAY I’d share a living space with anyone I wasn’t extremely close with. Personally I think it’s pretty risky to carry on with that plan, but that is my risk tolerance in my city.
I’m sure with your friend’s conservative approach to CV it’s taking a lot just for her to remain in the wedding. She may easily become nervous and overwhelmed if you have a mix of masked and unmasked guests and may not be able to stay long into the reception. Please try to remember we each have our own strong opinions on the virus and our health and what risk we’re comfortable with taking. Try to find a solution that both of you are okay with. You don’t want to throw away a friendship over this.

Is there a reason why she is being more cautious? I ask because I know that my fiancé’s father has stage four cancer and we are pretty diligent about the virus. Is she or a loved one high risk? With that being said does she understand that wearing a mask isn’t protecting herself but other people? In my own opinion if she feels comfortable being around people who aren’t wearing a mask outdoors then it shouldn’t be a problem for her to take hers off.

View Quoted Comment This is such a gray area unfortunately. I live in Rhode Island and we are not a high risk state but with my best friend being an RN in a covid unit she would say everyone in the cabin should be wearing a mask period. Especially if you are having outsiders like hair and makeup people come in.

Yes you're being unreasonable. If you choose to continue with a large gathering during a pandemic then you have to accept that people will and should wear masks at all times. It isn't right to try to make someone go against their comfort level when it comes to their health and the health of others. Pictures aren't more important than health or relationships.

Yes, you are being unreasonable about wearing a mask during the ceremony/reception. No one should feel forced into choosing between being in one of their closest friend’s weddings (that they were asked to be in because they are so close to you) or potentially risking their health for photos. If I were asked to step down as a bridesmaid just because the bride did not want masks in photos during a pandemic, I would ask the bride to reimburse me for the dress and really question whether or not the friendship is worth maintaining going forward.


As for the cabin, it is also unreasonable for her to insist everyone else wears masks and she should find her own accommodations if she is too uncomfortable being around others without masks indoors.

If any of my bridesmaids asked to wear a mask, I would 100% let them. If I was in a wedding during all this, and the bride told me I wasn't allowed to wear a mask during a global pandemic, she would likely no longer be my friend. Sorry to be blunt, but health and the health of one's family is so much more important than pictures. If you don't want masks in pictures, postpone your wedding.

Allow her to wear one but she can’t make others wear one in the cabin