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Bethany
Dedicated February 2021

Maid of honor cancelled

Bethany, on January 19, 2021 at 10:50 PM Posted in Planning 0 10
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So I’m 25 days out from the wedding and my maid of honor (traveling from out of state) just told me they aren’t coming to the wedding. Right now I’m full of emotion and feeling devastated to say the least.
I’m not really sure what to do now. I know I have to pick someone to take the MOH spot but I don’t know how to ask someone without them feeling like they’re second choice, especially so close to the wedding.
Any advice is much appreciated as I’m feeling lost on who to pick/what to do/how to react

10 Comments

Latest activity by Mrs. Spring, on January 20, 2021 at 11:30 AM
  • Kimberly
    Super March 2021
    Kimberly ·
    • Flag
    Why do you feel you have to replace your MOH? You don’t have to have an MOH.
    • Reply
  • Apryl
    Dedicated March 2022
    Apryl ·
    • Flag
    I'm sorry this happened.
    You don't have to replace the MOH. At this point anyone that you ask will know that they are the second choice.



    • Reply
  • Chrysta
    Master November 2022
    Chrysta ·
    • Flag
    Do not worry about filling the MOH role. There is absolutely no rule that says you have to have a MOH, and many people don’t! Just stick with the people you have already chosen for your wedding party and continue on as planned Smiley smile
    • Reply
  • Katie
    Super August 2020
    Katie ·
    • Flag
    Bethany! I’m so sorry for you! It’s completely understandable you would be devastated. Not all hope is lost - my brother did the speech for me at my wedding. Could you have a sibling step in? For what it’s worth, your bridal party is there for whatever you need and if I was a bridesmaid and the bride asked me to step into MOH role under these circumstances- I would be more than happy to do it!! What are friends for?! If there is more than one duty, could you ask the girls to each take a piece? If you can’t chose between them for the toast, perhaps a grandparent or godmother?
    • Reply
  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
    • Flag
    At the end of the day, to be quite honest, no one will even notice that you don’t have a MOH. All of the focus will be on you! This is your day! It sucks when things like this happen and when people unexpectedly back out etc. especially your MOH! I know it must be hurtful personally, but I don’t think you need to replace the spot. As far as pictures for your wedding video etc. goes people who see the pictures will have no idea who is your maid of honor and who isn’t. Do you have other girls in the wedding party? Maybe they could give the speech together? You don’t even need a speech technically. To be honest I’m actually worried about what my MOH will say Because she has zero filter LOL so we were thinking about skipping some of the speeches altogether! Just remember that the only person that needs to be there the person at the end of the aisle and you♥️ Hope this helps
    • Reply
  • A
    Super September 2020
    Alli ·
    • Flag
    I would move on and not stress about someone else; the day is all about you! 🤩
    • Reply
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag
    You don’t have to, and definitely shouldn’t, replace your MOH. That’s super hurtful to both her and the runner up. You’re correct that they’ll feel like a second choice because that’s exactly what they are.
    • Reply
  • Shirley
    Expert November 2020
    Shirley ·
    • Flag
    If my MOH couldn't come due to covid, I would have had a sibling or my mother step in. In the church I was married in, I needed a maid of honor as an official witness, so I HAD to pick someone. When I thought my MOH might not be able to make it, my mother was going to serve as my MOH/witness
    • Reply
  • Shelly
    Rockstar January 2022
    Shelly ·
    • Flag

    I'm sorry to hear that happened!

    I wouldn't replace her role with someone else. There isn't a rule that says you HAVE to have a MOH. Stick with who you have now and go about as normal. 😊

    • Reply
  • Mrs. Spring
    Master April 2021
    Mrs. Spring ·
    • Flag
    Oh no, that's unfortunate. You don't need to replace her.
    • Reply

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