Maid of Honor and Regrets

I don't have a maid of honor. I am splitting up typical maid of honor duties between my bridesmaids. One is standing closest to me. She has been my friend the longest so I want her to stand next to me. She is shy though so another one of my bffs I asked to give a toast. And my third bff who was there the night I met FH is signing the marriage certificate as a witness since she has been there to witness our relationship from day 1.

I had five bridesmaids and none of them were moh. Nobody needed a ringleader. Things were fine. They worked together when they wanted to plan something, and nobody had to feel like one of them was more important to me than the rest.

I have a MOH, 2 BM and a Jr.BM. My MOH is my long time best friend and love her dearly but she is not an organized person nor a leader, so one of my BM's is really acting like the MOH and let me know that she is okay with it and plans on organizing a shower and bachelorette party for me. I feel bad but I couldn't take the MOH away from my best friend, so for now we are all good, just as long as my MOH doesn't get bent out of shape over it but I don't think she will.

I had two women stand with me - they were both my maids of honor.

Thanks for the advice ladies. I should have fleshed this post out more originally, but I realized I didn't have the time. So my 3 BMs are all my college gfs. One of them is my roommate from freshman year and the other two are my suite mates from the other 3 years. The two suite mates live in one city and have always been pretty much attached at the hip. I couldn't pick between either one of them although I feel like we have always been able to see each other and stay close. However, my roommate is the most loyal friend you could ever ask for and is probably a better friend. This is the girl I would name MOH if I did. The downside here is that she has chronic health problems and when her issues flare up, she is pretty much out of commission for a week or two at a time. I trust that she will fight through if she has issues wedding weekend, but it may be harder for her leading up to. She lives in a third city (we live in 3 different cities about 2-2 1/2 hours away from each other). When I think about it, the suite mates would plan a better bachlorette party, but I feel like I want roommate to stand closest to me. So I am thinking to divide duties between the 3 of them to help relieve stress on all of them.

Maybe I will talk with them a little more and see what they are willing to help with/take on/put in monetarily and then decide from there if I want to name roommate as MOH or just have her stand next to me and sign the paperwork without the title.

I picked my sister as my MOH, I couldn't imagine anyone else! Not only would my sister be SO hurt but family should come first. I decided not to pick a Matron of Honor because I didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings.

My friend Sam is getting married next October and she asked me to be Maid of Honor and our other best friend from high school to be Matron of Honor. She's having 2 additional bridesmaids.

When my friend Caitlin got married, she picked her sister as Matron if Honor and myself as Maid of Honor (we've been friends since 2nd grade) and then had just 1 bridesmaid.

I have 3 BMs and didnt pick a MOH. I dont think its necessary.

My MOH is and was always going to be my best friend since we met when we were 18 months old. She now lives in SC (we still live in New England). But the distance doesn't matter to me. I was her MOH last year and I made it to all events down south. She will do the same for me up north. The distance doesn't matter at all.

As for having a MOH, I don't think you HAVE to have one. If you want to just have 3 bridesmaids, then do it. There really aren't any rules to follow. And as for the advice on bridesmaids needing a "leader", I don't really think that's true at all. The only thing bridesmaids are REQUIRED to do is, show up on your wedding day and stand beside you. That really is all. A MOH isn't required to plan anything. She/he is just the person you feel is closest to you and you want to give them that title of "honor". If they decide they want to throw you a shower or a bachelorette, then that's great! Most do! But it isn't "required" of them, per se.

You should pick your MOH as the woman (or man) who you are closest to, not for their ability to plan or not plan a bachelorette party, not by how much money they can contribute, not by how much they can help you, but by how strong your bond is. Being asked to be MOH is supposed to be an honor not a job. As long as she is able to buy a dress and stand next to you on that day, these are the only things you really need to consider.

My sister is my maid of honor. She practically raised me and is probably my closets friend. I knew she was the right one when she had a talk with one of my bridesmaids/sister who wanted to try on wedding dresses during my first shopping experience.

Leave it as it is.

I had 7 bridesmaids. My sister as MOH. My 2 cousins, and 4 friends. All but my sister one friend and young cousin are PREGNANT! My cousin who is my BFF is due 2 weeks before the wedding! My other BFF is due in March, she's on board with coming. The other three were on the fence but I think I'd rather just have my closest there. The others mean a lot to me but I wouldn't want to stand in a wedding 2 weeks after having a baby, or 7!months prego

I have 5 Bridesmaids and No MOH, and I'm perfectly fine with that. 2 of the bridesmaids have taken "charge" on planning stuff. Choosing a MOH to have someone "babysit" your bridesmaids sounds silly to me.

Bridesmaids and MOH have one required task and that is to show up at your wedding and stand by your side, everything else is icing on the cake and should not be "expected" of your bridesmaids or MOH.

Only choose a MOH if you truly do have one friend that stands out from the rest as your night in shining armor... For me all of my bridesmaids are special to me for something individually and I do not want to "single out" any of them by choosing a MOH, its just not neccessary.

I know exactly how you feel! I haven't chosen a MOH yet and I wasn't planning to... but I do want one though! My three oldest friends and my future sister in law are in my bridal party and it's so hard to choose

I have one MOH, 2 BM, 1 Jr BM. I had another BM, until she got pregnant. She was very offended I didn't ask her to be MOH. And my MOH totally did not expect me to ask her, and thought I would ask the one who is pregnant. My thing is, you need to pick the person that YOU feel is the best choice. Its YOUR day, and your MOH and BMs SHOULD be honored to be there, regardless of which order they stand in.

I had four honor attendants, and did designate one as 'maid of honor'. I live in California, though, and she lives in NY, so actually she didn't do many traditional MOH stuff except being the last attendant to walk before me and my dad, with the best man. A friend's mom hosted my shower, I put together a bachelorette party (both happened after the wedding-- it was a crazy busy summer) and a different attendant was also planning her wedding, so we went to caterers, venues, and wedding shops together. I was also an attendant in a wedding where we were all just 'honor attendants', and no one seemed to mind.

@FMS we are twins. I regret because of the fact she got the "title" while other BMs worked so hard to be there for me. but I dont regret because shes my sister...if that makes sense?