Lost for Words

She made a mistake, against your advice. This isn't your problem, it is hers, and she needs to fix it. You should tell her, nicely but firmly, that she needs to get another dress or necessary alterations to make it work, and if she cant, she is invited to attend your wedding as a guest instead of a member of the bridal party. Dont carry her baggage. This is her dumb mistake to fix.

Wow, I’m so sorry you’re going through this! I understand your friend is upset with the situation, but in no way was any of this your fault, and it is unfair of her to be angry with you! She had the option to do the try on before you buy, but she made the choice not to utilize it. she also made the choice to order custom sizing, when the website clearly states the item would not be able to be returned if she chose that option. This is completely on her. Unfortunately, it seems like the only option is for her to either suck it up and wear the dress, or purchase another one. Perhaps she could try to sell the dress she doesn’t like online?

View Quoted Comment I agree with this. You advised her to try it on before buying it and she didn't listen. The only one she can blame is herself. You should not feel like it's your fault cause it's not. Can she have the dress altered?

That is completely outrageous. She chose the dress. She is the one that has to own up to it. Unfortunately custom sizing there doesn’t allow returns. The only other options I could see her doing is trying to sell the dress to see if she can make any money off of that at all or just sucking it up and wearing it

I'd recommend that she take the dress to a seamstress. They may be able to reconstruct the parts of the dress that she doesn't like, and make them into something she does like. It will probably be more expensive for her than normal alterations, but it may make her feel more comfortable in it. Otherwise, if there's time, she can try to sell the dress and buy a new dress if she really doesn't like the one she bought.

Okay. She is bothered right now so I would let her calm down. I would in person talk to her and tell her that you want her to be apart of the bridal party. You do not want her to spend more money getting it altered (what exactly does she not like about it?) and that you chose the site but since she did not try before buy and did customizing there is not much that can be done apart from buying a whole new dress. She is projecting her anger on you. I would just ask her nicely can she please wear the dress for you as you want her there on your side on the day of?

If she says no at that point (now bare in mind this could harm the friendship) then say you understand. Her options are to sell the dress and make some money but in the mean time buy another dress (is there a set dress for all bridal party members?--where did the other ladies get theirs?) or get it altered to her liking. If she refuses all options then just ask her would she prefer to just be a guest at the wedding then so she does not have to worry about the dress? At the end of the day even if I have worn dresses I do not love I did it for the bride because it is her day. She needs to remember that. Do not say that but she needs to just calm down and do what she needs to do to make it work.

View Quoted Comment I agree. Alterations can make or break a dress. What dies she hit like about it in particular?

Yeah, I agree with the others. Completely her fault. Azazie was one of our options too, and my girls were going to do the try before you buy option, for this exact reason. They both felt uncomfortable ordering a dress they couldn't see first, so we ended up going with David's anyway - but I agree they have very limited colors, styles, etc. If you wanted to be really courteous, you could offer to buy her a new dress. But I don't think you should. She didn't use the try-on program, and made a purchase that she can't return. It's ridiculous to be putting anymore stress on you because I know how difficult it can be to plan a wedding, let alone get your girls to decide on and like a dress. Alterations aren't a bad idea, and depending what she may need done, could be cheaper than a new dress.

Have her take the dress to a seamstress. They can make magic happen!

I’m curious, what dress did she order, and what does she not like about it? I agree with taking it to a seamstress, they can do wonderful things.

View Quoted Comment

She said there is nothing about it she likes so I don't really know what the point of altering it would be.

View Quoted Comment

She doesn't like anything about it or at least that's what she told me.

View Quoted Comment

She said she just hates everything about it.

View Quoted Comment Are you making them all wear the same dress or are you letting them have the dress they want? If you are making them wear the same dress then she's just going to need to get over her dislike for it. If you are letting them pick then I'd see if maybe she could sell it to get some of her money back and then she could get something different. If she does that make sure she trys it before buying it and customizing it.

View Quoted Comment

The dress she ordered is the Nadia. She hates pretty much everything about it on her. She said the ruffle looks ridiculous, she feels fat (mind you she's only a size 4 and I'm a size 12), and she hates how the bottom looks.

View Quoted Comment

I let them pick. My only guidelines were color, length and fabric. There were tons of dresses for her to pick from.

View Quoted Comment

IMO she does not have to like it and that is fine but at the end of the day she needs to be there for you and put the negativity aside when she is the one that made the mistake. I would just talk to her about the situation which it sucks having awkward situations and just ask her to be there for you the day of even if she does not love the dress because you value the friendship and I feel if she is willing to be stubborn then that shows you the friend she is.

While I'm very sorry this is happening, but this is her fault as you told her to try it on before she bought it. This isn't on you, it's on her, but it sounds like she's just being negative & with that attitude she doesn't need to be in your wedding. At the end of the day, it is your wedding & as you said, you advised her to opt for their try before you buy option & she didn't utilize it. She doesn't have to like the dress, but it's only one day it's not that hard to suck it up for a few hours.

I would ask her what she wants to see happen in this situation, because I'm genuinely curious. Is she expecting you to buy her another dress??

What color is the dress? Poshmark has a ton of Azazie dresses, mostly in their popular colors (shocker...). She can buy one from there, but they are also final sale.

View Quoted Comment

I'm not sure what she wants to see done. The dresses are Red so I can recommend that she look to see if she can find a dress on Poshmark in her size, but I'm not sure if she really wants to purchase a new dress.