Long Distance After marriage

My husband went to school in a different city for a year after we got married. It was about 12 hour drive so he only came home every 6 or 8 weeks. We knew it would be hard but we found that webcams really helped (not in a creepy way lol!)

Like, on Friday's, we would have 'date night'. We'd both make the same dinner in our respective apartments (usually something easy like spaghetti) and sit down infront of the webccam together and have 'dinner'.

Silly, I know, but it made that year seem a lot shorter.

I have a friend who is living here in MN and her hubby is working in ND. He is able to come home every weekend (he's working in oil industry but he's got more of an office job). She still works full time, and has two kids at home, both under the age of 2. They cherish the time they do have together, and send lots of pics and messages and whatnot so they don't feel like they're missing out on eachother.

My fh is military and we spent the first year of our relationship apart, 6 days after the wedding he'll be going to China for 6 weeks, and then toward the end of the year he'll be going to Texas for 5 months (though if I'm pregnant by them, we'll be going with him). It is very difficult but the best ways of coping are to be around your friends and family, keep in as much contact as possible with him, skype, and even send snail mail occasionally. We texted a lot because we had different schedules, he worked mid-shifts and I worked days, but he still tried to call me every night to say good night.

Skype works wonders! FH is currently in Vegas and I am in Virginia. He comes home in 2 weeks! YAY! Then hes home till after the wedding, leaves in August for two months in Japan (hes missing my birthday boo) and then again in December for 6 months to Qatar (sp?). Sometimes I hate the military! But we have movie dates on skype, where we watch the same movie on netflix and then watch while on skype and we would lay in bed and talk and watch movies. Or just talk, like we are now

A few days after our wedding FH & I will drive to our new home (from CA to TN), settle in & be happy for the summer. At the end of August I will fly back to CA to student teach & earn my multiple subject credential from September through December, then FH will fly to CA to celebrate Christmas with our families & we will drive back to TN for good (lol). FH is in the Army & we have only spent 6 WEEKs of the last 14 MONTHS together. Being apart is tough, but you just need to remind yourself of the reason(s) behind the sacrifice. FH & I tell each other everyday that our relationship is strong, we will get through the separation because we are meant to be together. Keep reminding yourself & one another about the payoff in the end.

WOW, your ladies are some strong ones! I could not handle that at all! When I first met FH he worked out of town on the railway lines and was gone 9 home for 4, no internet and sometimes no phone depending on how far north. I told him he had to get a job in town and be home with me before I would marry him or have babies with him. He found a new job in town the day after having that talk and now we are together all the time. Huge pay cut to do it, but sooooo worth it!

What part of Arkansas are you in?? Agreed ^^^^^ and you ladies are strong, I dont think I could live away from my FH.

We spent the first ten months of our relationship living in different states. Shortly after we get married we will be spending 7 months across the country from each other. He recently joined the Army so that time is when he will be at basic and training after which means we really won't see each other much at all.

The first time we did long distance we talked on ichat (video chat thing) and texted a lot. At that point it was a little easier because we saw each other every few weeks. Now though we won't see each other for 10 weeks straight and then after that we don't know how often. I don't know how we will deal with that, but I know I will be spending time with close friends and focusing on school since it's my last semester. My cousin and my best friend are moving in with my too so that helps.

My FH is serving in a one year required military service. Has been since this past Oct. I get to see him about once a month. He has no internet access. The first four months were hard cause he wasn't allowed to carry a cell phone, so he had to call me from the campus payphone, if I missed the call, no way to call him back.

Now he gets to carry a cell (as long as no camera) and we talk nearly nightly. He gets off two weekends a month, one weekend he goes to his parents home, 2 hours away (not far, but I don't have a car, just a scooter and the nearest train station is still an hour drive away, plus I have 3 dogs and 4 cats, so if I wanna head there I need a pet sitter....) When he is at home we chat via msn with or w/o camera. It's hard to be apart from the one you love, but it's not to-die for hard. Just a matter of getting used to it.

About two weeks after we got married, my husband went away for 6 months for training. You just have to keep busy! For the first 2 1/2 months, we didn't talk at all. Just wrote letters (he was in basic training) it's hard, but absence makes the heart grow fonder.

When he was gone, I always had plans. I also worked which helped a lot. Hang in there! It only makes you stronger!

@ Monica, I was in your future situation this time last year. Basic training is tough because your communication is reduced down to strictly snail mail. But stay positive for your FH. I assume you support his decision to serve our country & back him 100%. Try to remind him of this in each letter you send. It will help the two of you to keep a strong relationship (& grow increasingly stronger). Good luck & tell your FH thank you for his service!

@ Elisa, I agree it does only make you stronger! FH & I just remind ourselves if it wasn't worth the sacrifice we wouldn't out up with the separation.

Mr Williams, is your husband is working at the new refinery they building there?? That is the only thing I know in North Dakota that is HUGE right now & everyone tries to get a job there because they pay very good

My fiance have been living across the country from each other for a year and likely will continue to do so maybe until a month after the wedding (hoping I can find work in his city since that's where we'd rather be, but if not, he'll be moving to my city). It's not ideal, but we talk on the phone every day and have Skype talks.

Yep. I'm in Texas and FH is Ohio. I spent a month there for the holidays, but I miss him so much. : ( He won't be moving here until a WEEK before the wedding. Can't wait until May when he comes down for a visit! We're lucky that he works from home, so his job comes with him.

I am just a newly wed with my foreigner husband. We only had one week honeymoon after our wedding. We are married already for 7months now. It was hard i cry sometimes at night . But he keeps me strong, we talk each other every day and skype too. I gave up my career and he let me go to college. He is also working on my papers so that i will be with him forever. My petition was already approved but the hindrances is from my country which i need to do a lot of errands. Everyday i just do the things i need to be done, making the most of my single life that is left , doing the things that i love , studying how to be a great wife, future mother, etc. just researching everything for my future together with him. And every night i also pray for him and for us. I guess that is my way of coping on being away from my husband. I should be enjoying the first stage of marriage with him right now, but being in a LDM(long distance marriage) is such a different story. Maybe the advantage of this is that you get to treasure each other everyday and knowing every details and you get to prioritize your husband more. And when you are already together, you still experience the feeling of a newly wed.