Late Guests- How to Deal

One of our shuttles was running a little late that had a ton of guests on it so my wedding planner called an audible and had me wait another 5 minutes or so to start the procession. I wouldn’t make it a 30 minute difference from your invite time because some people will arrive 30 minutes early and be waiting an hour for the ceremony to start.

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Wow, I see what you're saying.. so in your opinion, what time should I tell them to arrive for?

View Quoted Comment I would put the actual time on the invite. And have a personal conversation with the family members you’re concerned about and tell them if they aren’t there on time they will miss the wedding.

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That is true. I guess I thought if I told them to come early, that it would work in my favour, but your solution is great as well. Thank you so much, Kelly

You could also tell your family that the doors will be locked at 6 (or you could keep them open until 6:10) and therefore it’s really important to you that they’re there.

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That actually doesn't sound like a bad idea. Thank you a bunch, Courtney!!

View Quoted Comment You’re welcome! I totally get that you want everyone to be there I just would hate for your other guests to be punished for being on time. I hope it works out!

My invitation vendor told me to put the time half an hour before the ceremony started as well.

I put 15 minutes early on my invite. Just in case.

We do that for receptions. I said 6p but we knew 7p is when it's really going to start.. well that's what we thought but we delayed til 730p because people were so late

I plan on having a 15-20 minute window. If we said for example ceremony at 4:30 I would count on 4:45. Even the wedding party is late often. We will have refreshments for all before the ceremony anyway so I doubt people would mind waiting a bit longer.

Thank all of you lovely people for giving me your insight! Much appreciated.

I show up to weddings 20-30 minutes early. So if you put a false start time on your invitations, I would be left waiting 50 minutes to an hour and wouldn’t be happy. I would stick with the actual start time and tell people via word of mouth that they need to be on time or they won’t be able to enter the ceremony.

Honestly, the time is the time. I would start when you're supposed to start. If people are late, that's on them. I was like 5 minutes late to a wedding once and we felt so horrible for having to sneak in at the back. I definitely will never do that again. Hopefully it'll be a learning experience for them lol.

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WOW, yeah I definitely hear where you are coming from. I suppose I'll keep either on time or have a 10 minute time frame, and it's true, if they're late, they're late, it wouldn't really be on me. Thank you Hannah!!

I had a friend who’s now wife did that on their invites. It was a jerk move. Their wedding was a Friday, so not only did I have to make earlier than necessary childcare arrangements, we also had to rush with getting out of work early and trying to get there on time. When I found out the late start was intentional, it was a slap in the face. I totally understand you don’t want people late and walking in mid-ceremony. And even to plan on starting 10 minutes late is ok. But to intentionally lie and have no intentions of starting for at least 30 minutes after the invite time is just wrong. Maybe instead you could have someone lock the doors or prohibit late arrivals from interrupting your ceremony. Hopefully you can spread the word that you will be punctual with starting, and that will help get your family there on time.

I agree with everyone saying keep the start time as the real start time and calling the people you know will be late! Make sure you let them know that as soon as you walk in the room, the doors will be shut and they won't open until you are a wife!! Hope it goes great!

We listed noon on our invitation but told people to arrive between 11:30 and 11:45. We intended to start at exactly noon but were a few minutes delayed because 10 minutes before the ceremony we discovered that my strapless dress was too big (must’ve lost weight in the week before the wedding 🙄) and we had to spend extra time with my bridesmaid pinning it tighter so it wouldn’t fall down. But to my knowledge everyone was there and ready for the noon start time (except for me apparently 😂🤷🏻‍♀️)

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That is true, Jeanie. I appreciate your advice a lot, thank you so much!!

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Hey Jennifer, thanks for your input!! I suppose I will have it between 10 minutes to the actual start time. 10 Minutes isn't too bad. Just to give a little extra room. But nothing more than that!!