Kids in ceremony, not reception

The kids who will be in my wedding will come to the reception but no others. I understand that for some that means adults won't come at all but that doesn't sway my decision. Just decide if it changes yours

^^^wat?

"Would it be ok to invite them to the dinner, but ask the children under a certain age be taken home once it gets later into the night around the time alcohol consumption rises?"

No, none of this is okay. Look, the reception is to thank people for coming/participating in your ceremony. It is not for you. If you invite children to the ceremony, as guests or participants, they MUST be invited to the reception. The whole reception, not just for dinner. If you want a child-free reception, then you don't get to have kids in your ceremony. It's a choice.

@GymRat I believe what @Baletica is saying is that the kids in her ceremony are invited to her reception, but that no other kids will be at the reception. Nothing wrong with that.

Ffs, this whole "children can't be around alcohol thing is a crock!" We have alcohol at children's birthday parties. We drink at dinner around our kid.

It's rude to invite kids to part of your wedding and not to the other like any other guest. You either want kids or not. Own your decision, don't make stupid excuses.

The fact that you're hosting a wedding does give you the right to make parenting decisions on behalf of your nearest and dearest. If the parents of kids in your wedding party decide it's appropriate that kids attend the reception that's their call. You do not get to make that decision.

Telling the parents of kids that have participated in your ceremony that they can't attend the reception is really rude. It's rude to invite anyone for only part of an event.

I don't think it is rude at all. My fiances daughter is in the wedding (his wishes, not mine) but prior to engagement, I expressed I wanted my wedding to be 18+ and he agreed. We are likely going to hire a babysitter to watch her during the reception in the Grooms Suite. It is equipped with a TV, game console, snacks, and everything. She will be just fine! Don't listen to all these people on here. FIRST AND FOREMOST ... It is your wedding. You can do WHATEVER the heck you want to do!

Olivia, the difference is that the kid's parent, his dad, is agreeing to this (although I suspect the kid may resent you, depending on how old she is). It is rude to have kids at the ceremony and not the reception. I would not agree to it if I were the parent

Yep, definitely would be a bit of a problematic request. Some suggestions:
I would not make 16 your cut off, I would make it 21. If it's 16, anyone with a "mature 13 year old" will ask about them being invited. Another thing is people with younger kids and teens will sometimes be frustrated if you have a cuttoff like that, they are more understanding if its clear its just an adults event. If you have 19 and 20 year olds you are friends with being invited, then I wouldnt have a "cut off", I would just say "We love your kids! But we want you to be able to let loose at our wedding! Our ceremony and reception will be kid free." You don't need to specify your cuttoff age, no one will be calling you out for having an 18 year old invited. Do names on your rsvps if you're really worried about people bringing unwanted guests. You shouldnt need to say anything like "Besides the ring bearers and flower girls." people will assume that.
Don't think extended family with think it means they can bring their kids if those few kids are at the reception! Be clear on your wedding website that you are not having kids there, and when you send your rsvps be as clear as you can that the kiddos aren't invited.
If people ask why no kids in person, I would word it as you want the parents to not have to worry about those meltdowns, parents know to take kids out of the room if theyre melting down for your wedding, but then they are missing your wedding!

If you have the budget for it, I would suggest you offer up baby sitting for the reception for those few kids in your ceremony. It'll cost a little bit, but not make a huge dent in the wedding budget to have 4 hours of baby sitting for 4 kids. This way, those parents can have a good time and you don't have to worry about the kids. If you don't want to do this, then just have them at the reception, I wouldn't worry too much about it unless you're really worried about those parents leaving early. Providing them with babysitting would be a really nice gesture, especially since rehearsal dinners and a big day with kids can be a little stressful!