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Morgan
Savvy March 2019

Kids...can you allow some and not others?

Morgan, on July 16, 2018 at 8:03 PM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 45

When it comes to kiddos at our wedding, my fiance and I want our niece, nephew, and our godchild who is currently still in the womb at this moment. Plus we have some little cousins coming as well. The problem that has popped up is that my fiance's mother's family tends to bring kids and grandkids...
When it comes to kiddos at our wedding, my fiance and I want our niece, nephew, and our godchild who is currently still in the womb at this moment. Plus we have some little cousins coming as well.
The problem that has popped up is that my fiance's mother's family tends to bring kids and grandkids and their little friends to formal events.
I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but I don't want a gang of loud, strange children at my wedding.
I thought about putting a message like "only people listed on the invite can rsvp"
Has anyone done that?
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45 Comments

  • Tiffany
    Dedicated January 2019
    Tiffany ·
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    My FH and I are only inviting our immediate nieces and nephews. But they are also in the wedding, and aged 7+. Our invites are going to say "adults only". 1. It's expensive to pay for the catering of an additional 20+ children. And 2. We have a lot of beautiful antique furniture and staircases in our venue... so I'm not going to let them either fall and hurt themselves, or break something pricey. So you do you.
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  • Angela
    Dedicated September 2020
    Angela ·
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    I would state no children. Then the few children you want there give them a job so they are a part of the wedding which gives them a place of honor and an excuse. For instance they could hand out the programs or play an instrumental song,

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  • Zil3790
    Savvy June 2019
    Zil3790 ·
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    We are only having some kids go to our wedding as well. Only immediate families kids, that's it. Therefore when we did the invitations we put down the number of people invited. Also when addressing the invitations we put Their names ( Karen, and Manuel Rodriguez) not the family (Rodriguez Family). Hope this helps!

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  • Buffy
    Just Said Yes August 2020
    Buffy ·
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    View Quoted Comment

    Hi FutureMrsHaven, (I'm guessing you are Mrs Haven now?)

    I am
    in this situation now where my fiance's SIster-in-Law wants to invite
    her 2 year old to our wedding just because the 7 year old is a flower
    girl.

    I just worry about the toddler crying and have asked if she could be babysat but she says no one will??

    Did you have any issues at your wedding with your brother in-laws baby in the end?

    Thanks in advance for taking the time to reply. x
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  • Hanna
    VIP June 2019
    Hanna ·
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    We were in a somewhat similar situation. We have 3 nieces who are siblings. The older two were flower girls, but the youngest one was too little and we would have been worried about her crying, etc. Our in-laws found a babysitter for the youngest one and everyone was happy in the end! I would suggest you offer to help your fiance's sister-in-law find a babysitter. There's nothing wrong with breaking up siblings if some are old enough to be in the wedding and others are small toddlers

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