I got engaged on New years this year (01/01/19) and was very excited. Even knowing we would be paying for the ourselves I couldn't help but want the dream wedding I have always wanted. I had the song I would dance with my dad with to planned since the day I heard it when it was released in 2011. However, even before I was engaged my father would question why I wanted and actual wedding and always suggested I go to the court house. BUT no I planned a wedding, and went the day after I had shoulder surgery to view venues, picked one, booked a photographer, booked hair and make up, picked out bridesmaids dresses, and of course impulsively bought and off- the- rack- sale- dress that is now too big and definitely not my dream dress. That of course when I showed my mother and asked if it was what she pictured me wearing she states.. and I quote word for word. "HONESTLY I NEVER THOUGHT YOU WOULD GET MARRIED SO I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT IT, BUT I GUESS ITS A NICE DRESS". Also since finishing 90% of planning, its become evident that not a single person, other than myself and the groom are excited. No one wants to help me, or even offer a supportive word. The grooms sister threw fits about the date I had picked because she refuses to talk to her ex husband to get his niece/ nephew on a weekend she doesn't have them, which caused me to change my date multiple times. The grooms mother and some other family don't want to travel for my bridal party/ bachlorette party. My MOH doesn't want to help look for restaurants to cater, nor do my other bridesmaids (my sisters). And not a single one of them, including my soon to be mother in law can be bothered to help me go find a dress. I have not asked for a dime, simply their support and all I've been given is remarks such as "do I have to", "its so far", and "can't you hire someone to do that". And of course my fiance wants nothing more but to help but he doesn't want to see my dress, and he from the beginning has said the only thing he cares about is that I'm there when we getting married no matter how we do it.
So here is my question. I have not sent out invitations yet, and have not paid more than deposits (on Dj, hair, venue, photographer). Would it be terrible of me to cancel the traditional wedding and just elope and have small parties with family and friends at later dates? I fear missing memories that I won't be able to make again, but I also don't want to deal with the stress of feeling like I'm alone and not supported by my bridal party. I'm realizing I have the same feelings as my fiance and only care that its a memorable day for the two of us and I could care less about what everyone else thinks.
The main thing that is important to me is of course my fiance being there, and pictures to remember the day.
SO... keep the wedding plan. Or cut my losses and go elope..
