I've been feeling down about the whole process of planning lately and I just need a few ears who can actually relate to how I'm feeling.. at first it was going great! Until I realized what I'm planning is nearly the complete opposite of what I actually want..
There is an INCREDIBLE amount of pressure on FH and I to have this perfect traditional wedding with all of the dumb (In my option anyway) little traditions to go along with it. I bring up my ideas of what i want and family and friends just shoot them down or give me a face like "why would you want that"
- I have an uneven bridal party so I suggested the groomsmen already at the front of the alter and the bridesmaids walk in alone - Nope. FSIL and MOH hate that idea...
- I want to have those cute little hoops with some floral decor for the bridesmaids to hold instead of traditional bouquets - Nope. Bridesmaids hate that idea...
- I absolutely DO NOT want to do a garter or bouquet toss or have all my guest clanging on the freaking glasses to get us to kiss - But FMIL is insistent that we do all of these dumb (to me) little things because "she did them at her wedding so we HAVE to do it at ours" .. (eye roll)
-There are at least 2 dozen other ideas of things that I want to do to make this wedding feel more like "us" that EVERYONE hates.. Don't get me wrong I have and can put my foot down on things (like Groom/smen wearing jeans instead of a suit and having tacos for dinner) but goshdanget I'm about to go insane with trying to please everyone..
We have a small budget ($5,000) and I think even that amount is absolutely absurd to spend on a wedding that I don't even want!!
All I want is to be married to my best friend 
I want to go somewhere in the Black Hills at the base of a mountain and have a cute little whimsical ceremony and reception with like 30 people and just sit around a bonfire later in the night and talk and reminisce..
I have talked to FH about how I'm feeling and he says "yeah I know, I'd love that too but we just can't".. All because of his family. My family would be super chill with the idea, but his, not so much. I know and have excepted that getting what I want will never be an option because I know deep inside FHs heart he is so excited to have a traditional wedding that everyone is "supposed to have" and I want to give that to him. I am simply over ruled by other peoples wants for our wedding. (I know there will be at least one comment saying "its your wedding do what you want" but just like everything else, its a know-your-crowd deal and unfortunately my crowd is pushy and unwilling to open their mind to new ideas..)
Ugh, I guess I just needed to vent.. not really looking for any advice so thank you for reading and showing support!
