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Lindsay
Devoted July 2021

Just looking for support

Lindsay, on May 20, 2021 at 7:56 AM Posted in Community Conversations 0 28
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To make a long story short I got married last year in my backyard with only 30 people didn’t wear my dress or anything. I lost my mother in law 4 months prior to my wedding day and wanted to get married that day to honor her cause she knew about the date. Fast forward to this year finally getting this reception to actually work and look next to normal and I am so beyond depressed and anxious and feel very similar to how I felt last year but this time it’s because so many things have changed. We have had so much drama on top of it a groomsmen dropped out people I thought were going to be there for me aren’t coming it’s just crazy how so many things can change in the course of a year and I’m just struggling with handling my emotions around trying to let go of the people who aren’t there for me and actually enjoy this event finally. The entire event has had nothing but negative energy surrounding it from people telling me to walk away and take the money but not understanding that I didn’t get my full experience and things were half done. I just feel so depressed and I feel like I finally get this to work and I’m just constantly getting let down. I am just looking for some support on how to handle my emotions regarding this yes I’m very happy in my marriage but after all we went through I just finally wanted that happy celebration but it just doesn’t feel that way. I’m hoping as I get closer things will start to feel more positive.

28 Comments

Latest activity by Lindsay, on May 21, 2021 at 1:59 PM
  • A
    Expert September 2022
    Allie ·
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    I'm sorry, Lindsay! I definitely understand the feeling of wanting a "normal" celebration and wedding like we've been dreaming of our whole lives...and then it not happening. We cancelled/possibly postponed to 2022, so I can't relate to planning a wedding celebration these days, but I imagine it's hard and definitely has its share of ups and downs. I don't have any excellent advice, but I just wanted to say I wish you the best in your planning, and I really hope you're able to have a wonderful, positive, joyful celebration!

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  • Lindsay
    Devoted July 2021
    Lindsay ·
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    Thank you so much for your kind words! I hope the best for your planning and wedding as well us corona brides really deserve a break from all the heartache and a proper celebration!
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  • Mrs.a
    Master October 2021
    Mrs.a ·
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    Girl, I feel you 💯! I’m glad you came here for support, because like you, I feel like coming here just gives a different outlook on things. I’m also in the same boat where my MIL passed away just weeks before our original date. We went through with it as a very intimate minimony as it was her wish that we still get married regardless. It was an emotional rollercoaster of events, and now we just want to have a celebration with close friends and family. I hope too it will get better as we approach our date, and I hope ever so much for you! I’m so sorry for what you’ve been through. Hopefully this will make us stronger! And we certainly will never forget that we got married during a pandemic.

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  • Lindsay
    Devoted July 2021
    Lindsay ·
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    I’m sooo sorry for your loss!! You and I can totally relate on every level! So many emotions! Thank you so much and I truly wish you the best celebration you deserve it! Your so right it’s definitely going to make us stronger and what a story to tell of how love can truly make it through even a pandemic!
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  • Victoria
    Devoted June 2020
    Victoria ·
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    You have all my sympathy! It’s been a terrible year and I can absolutely relate.
    I likened my delayed reception to childhood birthdays- if your birthday was on a weekday and your parents threw a weekend party it was still your birthday party! Any delayed wedding celebration isn’t any less of an occasion- it was a pause out of love and mindfulness for those you’re closest to.
    I’d love to suggest some self-care activities, and maybe some you can do with the new hubby! Zentangling, yoga, a reflections book, puzzles... even bubble baths, journaling, or volunteering at a pet shelter for puppy time Smiley smile Your celebration is going to be SO WAY AWESOME!! You’re having a party with your shiny new husband with people who love you! It’s going to be pretty and yummy and magical! Look forward and don’t let the last year and the chaos hold you back. Prioritize the two of you and let the rest fall into place. I realize I should have done that a bit more now that I’m 2 weeks out.
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  • Lindsay
    Devoted July 2021
    Lindsay ·
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    Love everything about this!! Thank you so much for your awesome advice!!! Self care is a must your so right I’ve got a nice facial scheduled for next week! But I will be trying out some of your options as well thank you!!
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  • Victoria
    Devoted June 2020
    Victoria ·
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    Ooo!! A facial sounds like fun!! Maybe you need a cute new outfit to go in?! Lol Or at least have someone cook you the next meal after- like a chef at a restaurant 🤗
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  • Lindsay
    Devoted July 2021
    Lindsay ·
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    Haha love the ideas! All sound amazing and are already putting a smile on my face! Thank you so much 😊 💕
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  • Mrs.a
    Master October 2021
    Mrs.a ·
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    Love this! These are all great ideas! 😊
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  • Mrs.a
    Master October 2021
    Mrs.a ·
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    Thank you! It will be one heck of a story!
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  • Victoria
    Devoted June 2020
    Victoria ·
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    Thank you! And I love your profile picture flowers lol
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  • Katie
    VIP August 2021
    Katie ·
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    I understand how you are feeling. My wedding is in 3 months and everything just isn't going well. And I'm starting to get depressed and just feeling numb. But I try and talk to my fiance and my mom about how I'm feeling it's hard because I'm not one to rely on anyone for any sort of help. I suggest though trying to talk to someone close to you and get these feelings out in the open and off your chest. Also what helps me with my feelings is putting on YouTube and searching for sounds of nature and just close my eyes and take deep breaths. Just remember everything is going to turn out good.
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  • Lindsay
    Devoted July 2021
    Lindsay ·
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    Thanks girl! Thankfully my bridesmaids have been so supportive I just need to work more on controlling my sadness love the YouTube idea for sure! Thank you so much and I hope all goes well with your wedding! ♥️
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  • Suzann
    Dedicated October 2021
    Suzann ·
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    I'm so sorry for everything you've gone through! Although we didn't get married yet (we postponed) I went through something similar. People are very insensitive and cruel at times. The best advice I can give you is to find enjoyment anywhere you can and focus on the positive wherever you can find it.

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  • Lindsay
    Devoted July 2021
    Lindsay ·
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    Thank you so much I really appreciate your kind words❤️
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  • Haley
    Savvy May 2023
    Haley ·
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    I 100% understand where you’re coming from. Your feelings are completely valid and you deserve to have the full wedding experience! I’m sorry your friends/family are not showing up for you. Idk why people think weddings aren’t a big deal, even if it’s a reception.
    I too will likely have a super low turn out so I just had to accept that people are a$$holes and people who pretended to want to be there aren’t worth my time.
    Keep a list of people you KNOW will be there and stick with them! Forget everyone else and party with those who care Smiley smileI know your reception will be beautiful and special no matter what
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  • Lindsay
    Devoted July 2021
    Lindsay ·
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    Aww thank you sooo much you are so right and that’s exactly what I’m going to do take it as a lesson and party and enjoy with those who matter! Thank you so much for lifting my spirits!
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  • Sara
    Savvy July 2021
    Sara ·
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    Hey Lindsay. I'm totally relating to how you feel. It's mostly the people you thought that were going to support you end up making things difficult for you and not following through. It hurts when your favorite family member or friend can't make it. My family was never really close 😕 and some people just made planning harder than it needed to be so whatever.


    Most important thing is to let yourself feel these emotions to deal with them now. There has to be some good in all of the bad. If it really helps, seek help from a therapist. I know it sounds ridiculous, but sometimes they end up helping you find the root cause of what's going on.
    I hope this helps you from me -- you're not alone. I feel the same hurt you do. We're kind of in the same boat with how things ended up for our nuptials. We did a minimony last year and now we're doing the big thing this year but as a vow renewal. I can't wait to put this all behind me and just go on our long awaited honeymoon!We will get through this 💓
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  • Mrs.a
    Master October 2021
    Mrs.a ·
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    Awe thank you! It was a bouquet to honor my MIL

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  • Lindsay
    Devoted July 2021
    Lindsay ·
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    Aww thank you so much Sara! I couldn’t agree more can’t wait to put it behind me as well but your right there’s gotta be some good and I’m gonna feel the emotions now and hopefully leading up to it I’ll be able to enjoy it! Hoping the best for your day as well! Us corona brides deserve our days!
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