Jehovah witness help!

My SIL's family is JW. She is not baptized in it but her family are practicing. Her family partied at her's and my brother's wedding. She has also been to a bunch of weddings on my family's side but again, she is not baptized in it. She sits in the pews vs. staying in front.

We have lots of JW coming to our wedding and 2 of them are in out bridal party. They can't go to a church ceremony of another religion, but they can attend weddings, go to parties, etc. It is up to the person themselves as to whether they feel like they are doing right by themselves by going. If they themselves don't feel it is appropriate, they wont go, but if they think it is ok, they will. My FH is not JW, but his parents were both military and deployed constantly. There were 2 families that he'd stay with and both happened to be JW (one in Costa Rica, the other in Texas) and neither knew one another. I think how strict JW are is really depending on the congregation as there are differences I've noticed between the two families I just mentioned. To be honest though most days I would never know they were JW. They act like everyone else and are very respectful towards me even though I am Catholic (and they know this).

I would say your best bet, if you are wanting to be sensitive to their beliefs, to ask them. That is what I did. I know they don't like crosses, but I wasn't planning on having any so that was a nonissue. I asked them what they would and wouldn't have a problem with and we had a casual discussion about it. I am not completely changing things at all, and they know this, but there are certain things that I now know to tell them before I do so that they can leave or whatever. Our venue has an outdoor area with a campfire and they will go to that area when we are doing certain things they don't believe in. No big deal though. Like I said, I would just ask them.

Our ceremony is in a chapel, but its pretty...nondenominational. The chapel is on the venue and they hold all different types of weddings there so I don't think it's based on one religion. My FH isn't super comfortable with religious ceremonies either, but it was important to me that my Lutheran pastor, who I grew up with and was baptized and confirmed by, be the one that married us. I have asked my older sister (the one who probably follows the JW religion the most) what she would be comfortable with and she was the one who told me that it would be "against the rules" for my dad (a JW...or supposedly) to walk me down the aisle to a Christian pastor. So I don't know. I'm just going to do it the way I had initially planned since there is no clear cut answer and they can just join in where they feel comfortable

I use to work with a JW, and she said that the only thing they celebrate is Weddings and Wedding Anniversaries because that is sanctioned by God. So I think that they can celebrate your reception but don't think that they are allowed in the Sanctuary of a church of another faith.

JW's fascinate me. Ok, I hope that doesn't sound rude. What I mean is that I've never actually talked to one, and I like learning about different people's beliefs.

Good luck with your situation! Sorry I can't help :/

My mom is a JW along with my Grandma and one Aunt. I was raised that way but I am not of that faith anymore.

From my experience, Laura has given the best advice. There really isn't anything you can do to accommodate them without having a full scale JW ceremony at a Kingdom Hall and you can't do that anyway without being a JW. Just do what you plan to do and let them make their own decisions and faith calls about it. My mother had to ask a Brother (similar to Pastor) if she would be able to attend my wedding if I held it at a church. His advice to her was that she could attend but not participate or pay for anything that was at the church.

To be honest, there are so many rules and restrictions on things that are considered normal and everyday by everyone else that JW's are accustomed to having to work themselves around it. If you have a prayer in your ceremony they just won't bow their heads and pray with you. If you have scripture readings they won't follow along. Just let that be on them. Don't change your ceremony.

I am a JW and I think Laura gave the absolute best advice and practically summed up what I was about to say. It is up to each person individually as to what their conscious will allow them to do. There are no set "rules" or "restrictions" we go by. We live solely on the bible principles and try to live our lives as closely to that as possible. So to answer your question Kristen, go about your ceremony as YOU want and leave it up to them to decide rather they should participate or not. For example, I feel ok about going into a church, just to participate in the religion but physically going into a church, others may not feel the same. I read someone saying we don't bow our heads in prayer when someone is praying, that's so not true, bowing our heads is in respect to God so of course we would bow our heads no matter who is praying, someone else said we don't have fun! tsk, that's hilarious because I've had more fun as a witness than any other period of my life ( I was not born or raised in the faith, I learned about the faith and baptized in my late teens). My family is predominately baptist, my father is Muslim and we have several Lutherans that are in my family and they ALL came to my wedding and had a blast! My wedding party was of mixed denominations and they all were allowed to participate at the ceremony and party at the reception. So its not as strict as lot of the ladies were claiming it to be. Just do what you feel is respectable to all and let them all decided what they will and will not participate in. Trust me, they wont take it personal.

@ladyMonk if you will like to know more about our faith and the bases of our religion, feel free to visit JW.org to gain some insight on who we are

Obviously, different congregations may have different ways of practice from each other. I grew up in the Kingdom Hall and my mother is still a JW. We were taught not to bow our heads to any other God but Jehovah which meant we were not supposed to bow our heads in prayer anywhere outside of that faith. Also, a lot of religions actually pray to Jesus Christ, his son, which was not something that was approved of by JW.

Again, this may only be at the congregation I was raised in, but it is not untrue.

My grandmother was also Jw before she passed and my mom just left the faith last year. Like I said before, different congregations, different perspectives. Since half of our family were Jehovah's witnesses we did pray at family gatherings before meals. Sometimes it was to Jehovah, sometimes God, but they are the same person. I get what tyson is saying though.. I have never been in a situation that they prayed to Jesus, which is God's son in JW belief. In others I believe it is god in human form? I never could answer the question, directly, because I never new if it was in a CHURCH or not! Now that I know it's in a non-denominational church, it really is up to the person. And I'm SURE that your siblings would NOT want you to change your ceremony to please them!

This post is the exact reason why I am so confused by everything JW. When I said each JW has a different set of "rules"...aka, which God they can bow their heads to, what activities they can partake in, etc...EVERYONE has a different opinion. It's all over the place. So, I'm definitely just going to take the advice on leaving my worries at the door, let my siblings know what will be happening, and going about my ceremony!

As someone who was raised as a witness and is choosing to no longer practice, I have recently done a lot of reading on this subject as I want my parents to be at my wedding but didn't know if they could be there. Basically the cut and dry version is "it is up to an individual's conscience". Witnesses are not allowed to participate in any other religious practices but they can be an observer. Meaning they won't be bowing their heads in prayer or participating in any rituals (sorry I'm not educated on Lutheran beliefs). However, if they personally feel that even being in the church will make their conscience feel guilty (or could possibly stumble others') then they will choose not to attend. My advice: invite them and let them make their own decisions. With my family I have prepared mentally for them to not be there, but am still hoping they will be.

I also just realized this was posted in 2014... Please let me know how it went for you (if you feel up to sharing of course)