I've lost my best friend

I'm sorry hun *hugs hugs* I know how hard it is.

For approx. 2 hours we got back to his car and he had 17 missed calls and 22 missed text messages all from her. At this point they weren't even a couple they were just friends. She was freaking out asking where the hell he was and why he was ignoring her. He called her to inform her of what had happened and she screamed at him so loud I could make out every word from across the room. This is just one example of hundreds I can think of where she has proven time and time again she is a psycho bioatch. She is poison in my opinion and I have told him this. Chad's mom and I have even had conversations about this girl and how terrible she is for Chad. So it's not just me who sees it. A few months ago Chad and I went out for coffee after I got off work which was around 11pm. We were talking about her and he said how hard it was for him knowing that his best friend didn't like her and how much easier it would be if we all could just get along. I told him I didn't like negative people (con't)

In my life whos life ambition is to cause drama in everyone around them's lives. During this conversation his phone rang and it was her. She started yelling at him again saying how unappropriate was for him to be meeting another women at 11pm for coffee and how he needed to cut ties with people in his life who didn't except her. I told Chad that I was sorry for putting him in this postion and I would never make him choose but I just couldn't approve of someone so toxic being in his life. A few weeks later over text messaging he informed me that if I wanted to continue being his friend I need to except her and be willing to hang out with her. He also informed me that we would no longer be able to have any one to one time and all hang outs would include her. If I couldn't except these terms then he no longer could hang out anymore. I was crushed. My FH and I had been talking about marriage but weren't engaged at the time and I had even considered asking Chad to walk me down the (con't)

Aisle since my dad has passed on. That's how close the two of us are. I'm an only child and Chad has been the brother I never had. Months have went by and finally I couldn't take it any more and found myself texting him today. He had a few minutes before work so I called him. We talked briefly. I told him that it was killing me that all of this wedding stuff was going on and I was unable to share it with my best friend. I told him I really wanted to hang out and go for a coffee and catch up and all he could say was he was happy for me but it was hard. This is all killing me. I just want my best friend back. I never thought a damn bioatch would come between us. I don't know what to do anymore.

Sorry hun. Eventually he will see her for what she is.....

Okay okay back up you were hanging out with him at 11pm at night and she is suppost to be okay about that? Never mind that you guys are exes and there is a certain amount of jelousy there and then to top it off your talking to his mom about how she is and you really think this girl doesn't know it. You know how many girls get on here and complain about how they try and try but the ex gets in the way. He is your friend and with that there is a certain amount of respect but if this is the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with than she deserves a certain amount of respect too... I may be totally off but I'm seeing that you judge her based on her yelling at him over hanging out with you and you know hun if my FS hung out with an ex till 11am and I tried to get ahold of him to find out what time he'd be home and got nothing, I'd be raising cane too.... I am truelly truelly sorry you have lost a friend and I can tell it has really hurt you I just feel that either I don't cont.

Know the whole story or your not looking at it from every side just your side saying that this girl sucks but how would you feel if someone tried to get inbetween you and your FS?

Chad and I have NEVER been romatically involved. Nothing has ever happened or even come close to happening between us. Chad's mom and I were only sharing our concerns with one and other because we have that kind of a relationship. She doesn't want to see her son with someone who is going to hurt him and I don't want to see my best friend hurt. As for my FH he knows how close Chad and I are and that has never been an issue. He knows that after work is the only time we were ever able to see on another and he was fine with that. I don't think what time of day it is should have any barring on the issue. We were at a coffee shop it's not like we were alone at either of our homes or anything. And even if we were FH knows what kind of a relationship Chad and I have and knows he has nothing to worry about. Screaming at him over the phone is just a minimal example of how badly she treats him.

Luta - I didn't see her mention that they were ever a couple and, thus, she's not his ex. They're just close friends unless I misread something.

Jaycee - Sorry you're having to go through this. I know I have my own jealousy issues and wouldn't be okay with my FH hanging out with another girl like that either, but I also wouldn't be giving ultimatums. Sure, I think you could give her a chance and try and make things friendly, but to lose your best friend over this stinks. I just hope she treats him better when jealousy isn't getting the best of her.

And I'm not trying to get in between them. He is an adult and can make his own decisions I don't have to like them or agree with them but he is the one that has cut ties with me. At the end of the day I know it was her doing.

Jaycee i agree with a lot of what luta has said. and i will add that regardless of your opinion of her and i have no doubt you are just looking out for your friend's best interest, he is entitled to choose his own mate. there's no denying what you've witnessed but she must have some redeeming qualities if he is willing to continue a relationship with her and cut off such a close friendship with you. i have been in your position where my friend's mate had a problem with our friendship. actually i've been in t hat position quite a few times lol. nevertheless i'm always willing to remove myself from the situation so that i'm not the source of tension in someone else's relationship. he is asking you to accept his mate and respect his right to choose. i would encourage you to meet with her and have a heart to heart. make an attempt to bury the hatchet or at least find a common ground. if you find that you still don't "like" her fine. but i would like to think you can at least be cordial

For the sake of maintaining a relationship with a close friend. b/c obviously this is really bothering you. but he is also in a tough position.

Sorry for your loss!

I have friends who have been is situations similar. the chick is a crazy biscuit. i dated a guy once who's ex couldent get over the fact he had allready found a new girl... i talked to her on the phone cus she would call so so so many times and texted... i finally said let me answer the phone.. i did and she wouldn't believe that i was dating him. she kept saying shut up jessi just give me to your brother... now me and her are about 2 octaves different in tone of voice... i have other stories about having to temporary louse my bff for a while.... i hung out with my bff's parents for about 2 years till she finally realized that she was not exactly thinking right, she dated really really bad guys and diid a lot of partying and now every thing is fine. you just have to hope things will get better sooner than later and you get up dates from his mom untill he is done with her.

I miss read on the whole ex thing. I saw the family thought we were going to get married.... It is a different side of the coin that you guys aren't ex's, and if my openion hurt I'm sorry but I still stand by most of what I said and honestly maybe if there is a breather period she'll be able to see that all it is, is a friendship... Again I am sorry that you are hurting.

I am playing devils advocate to most of the other posts. The only thing that I disagree with, is that you HAVE to accept this girl. I have a best friend and a very close cousin who are both dating horrendous. In the case of my cousin, my entire family cannot stand him, to the point that I think my uncle may actually punch this guy out one day!!! However, we have no right in saying who someone should be dating. Like Ladylee said, he obviously sees something in her and he is obviously happy with her, so you have to be happy for him.

Now onto HIS decisions and this crazy psycho. I'm sorry but I don't tolerate jealousy at all. I have been VERY close to my parents best friends son for my entire life. If FS ever had an issue with us hanging out, then there would be an issue between FS and I. It should not matter the gender of your best friend at all. Would this psycho be okay with him hanging out with a male? Then why can't she just realize you guys are friends. Male-Female (cont'd)

Are both common and healthy! Sometimes I would rather call my best guy friend, or any guy friend, then my best girls. I'm so sorry you lost a friend because of this. He was unfair, and he should have been explaining to HER that you guys are best friends and that she has nothing to worry about. Jealousy ruins relationships. He will soon realize this.