Things like this 8x10 framed picture of her. When we first met it was in his room ok, not much I can do about that. He moved in with me for a few months while I was finishing up my divorce and he wanted to put this picture of her in my bed room. Made a compromise and found a place in my living room for it to be displayed. When he moved back into his own place there it was front and center when you walked in. We talked about it and he agreed to put up a picture of the two of us to sort of balance out the old and the new. Came over to surprise him and make dinner one night and our picture was stuffed in a drawer in the kitchen. Please tell me I'm not wrong for being upset about that. I know a picture seems petty but there is so much more. He talks about her constantly which is sweet but then he'll follow it with something like "I love you but you know if she were alive we wouldn't be together" which is kind of heart crushing to me.
When he first proposed it was without a ring because I was getting divorced and it didn't seem right to me to wear another mans ring until it was finalized. Now his friends keep needling him when are you going to marry her, until one of my best gf's pipped up to them one night that she won't let him marry me until he proposed with a ring. So about a month later he goes and gets me a ring, on the anniversary of when him and his dead wife got married. It felt wrong and actually a bit tacky to me so I made him take the ring back.
I'm constantly hearing how she must have sent me to him. Honestly it's getting really old. His brother in law who I've met numerous times was shocked when he found out we were getting married and was like "what's your name, I don't bother remembering his gf's names until they've been around awhile" meanwhile we've been dating going on 3 years now.
But today was kind of the kicker I feel like I'm at my breaking point. Since we are a few months away from being married we decided it's time to move back in together. He's moving into my place since I got the house in my divorce with full custody of my kids. He is hell bent on moving in this old couch he got from one of his brothers. Well this brother tells me today that he got the couch from my fh, it used to be his and his dead wifes. It's an extra piece of furniture that would be out in the garage until we figured out what to do with it.
I feel like his past is constantly being brought into a future that should be only ours. Am I just over reacting?
