Is not sending thank you notes a thing?

@Reggie How old are you?

This post just made me realize that the wedding I went to in October..never got a thank you. Now I'm salty as shit.

Otherwise any wedding I've been to I have gotten them..but like...super fucking late. I think mostly for people waiting for their pro pics back to get a thank you. I'd rather just get a regular hand written thank you and not one 4-6 months later. My plan is send out my wedding shower invites next week (my shower is Sunday) and get my wedding invites out within a month.

Ours will be going out within the next two weeks for our 03/05 wedding.

@Aurelia You would probably know, people do talk. My aunt didn't get a thank you card from me a few years ago at Christmas and she called my mom to find out if I got her gift (I don't live with my mom, but I think she felt uncomfortable asking me outright). I had never received the gift, and because I always send thank-yous she knew something was up and was able to put in a claim for the gift and have it resent to me.

Two sets of my aunts/uncles/cousins in the family do not send thank-you cards for anything, and the rest of the family has stopped sending them gifts. Thank-you cards are pretty important and pretty effortless to me.

I didn't attend two baby showers last summer (they were 5+ hours away) so I sent gifts to each. The one that was always bitchy in college actually sent a thank you. the one that I had been very close friends with didn't!

Every once in a while I still think of that. Couldn't take 3 minutes to write a short thank you, slap a stamp on it and send it away?! They can be done far before the baby arrives.

It shouldn't be a thing, but it does seem like it is.

I went to a baby shower 1 or 2 weeks before my bridal shower. The baby wasn't born until a month later. My thank you notes went out within 2 days, hers have yet to arrive.

Wait, I just remembered she posted a facebook status about her baby shower that night. Maybe that was her thank you note? That shouldn't be a thing either.

Some cultures don't do thank you notes. Ever. At all. Mine doesn't. First time I ever heard of or got a thank you note, I was already in high school and had no clue wtf I was supposed to do with it.

I was just talking to FH about this Easter weekend. I think thank you notes are a dying art, but IMO still very necessary. At a family event, we saw someone we given a housewarming gift to earlier this year, at the housewarming party we noticed they already got the item we got them, so we gave them the receipt to exchange it. Well at the family event we were like "did you ever get around to exchanging it" and they were like "oh, yeah!! we got a such & such." A thank you card would have eliminated that line of questioning. Plus it lets ppl know you really appreciate them & what they gave you (you took the time to write something and MAIL it). Its sad no one does this. I keep thank you cards in my car, office and in my house. They always come through & are remembered by ppl that you appreciate them.

People that don't send thank yous are jerks. I think its rude. And people that send pre printed generic "Thank you for your gift and coming to our wedding/ baby/ bridal shower" are also jerks.

Every single person got a personalized thank you from us because my mother raised me to be polite and not an asshole.

From someone who just hand wrote notes for everyone who attended my engagement party , people are generally surprised be receiving them even thought it is proper etiquette.

This is an UO and it probably makes me super uncivilized, but I just don't see the point of thank you cards. I'll send them for the sake of being polite, but why can't I just thank the person directly? Why do I have to mail a formal note?

Every time I've gotten a thank you note, I've thrown it away. What else am I supposed to do with it? Plus, they just feel super awkward when I get one from a close friend. The notes are usually a lot more formal than we'd normally talk to each other and it just feels odd. Personally, I'd be more comfortable with a quick thank you FB message or text. That way, we can actually converse and whatnot.

Again, I'll send them to be polite, but I don't understand why a thank you text is considered impolite.

It's a hit or miss thing. I've been to 4 weddings in the last 4 years and only received 2 thank yous for the wedding gifts. I was most disappointed in the wedding we went to Vegas for. One of my very good friends got married in Vegas. No invites were sent out or anything, she just basically sent everyone an email with the date and said if you can come, we'd love to see you there. So my boyfriend (now FH) and I went and had a great time. We never got a thank you for the money we gave them or for being there with them that weekend.

Bullshit. Thank you notes rock. I write them to EVERY vendor, EVERY coordinator, ALL the other vendors and ALL my couples.

Because besides being really thankful about being chosen (couple), having other vendors cooperate and play nice and wanting the venues to see my smiling face on a note that tells them how great their staff was?

No one else does it.

And that's why I do.

I went to a wedding recently (and gave a generous gift) and the "thank you note" I received was one of those photo cards of the bride and groom holding up a sign that said "thank you". There was not a single word written on it. I still cringe a little when I think about it.

Isn't it funny how the gift giving process gets easier (honey fund, etc) but the thank you note trend is downward?

To me, it's just another indicator of general decline of manners overall.

I honestly don't really pay attention to thank you notes. I was raised to write overkill thank you's, so I do. If a friend invites me over for dinner, I'll send a thank you after, but I don't expect the same in return. I was not raised to keep tally of the thank you notes that I receive. I guess I don't really care that much.

I think I've only been to one bridal shower and wedding that I did not receive any thank you notes for. My plan is to start writing and sending them about a week after the wedding when we are back from the honeymoon. I think I heard 1-3 months is standard etiquette for sending them out after the wedding, but my goal is to be done in less than a month!

I have been hounding my 23 year old to send them for the gifts she got for her baby shower in Jan for 3 months. I sent the ones for my 2 year olds birthday party from last Sat today. My 23 yo was raised to send them and once she moved out decided to not bother with them anymore. Not sure where I went wrong or if it is generational.

I honestly don't take it personally with thank you cards. I only receive one out of 5 weddings I have went. I went to numerous of baby showers and birthday not one thank you card I received just verbal which is was good enough. I am not to keep cards.

The pre-printed "thank you" on the card is the absolute WORST. I'd almost rather receive no note than one that the couple so blatantly gave zero thought to.