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Alison
Savvy August 2020

Is it possible to postpone 3 days before the wedding?

Alison, on August 25, 2020 at 1:33 PM Posted in Planning 0 22
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This might be a stupid question, but I decide to keep my date for this year despite the pandemic and everything keeps going wrong and it just feels wrong to continue with it. My hair stylist has covid. We lost half our guest list. 3 people just this week told me they can no longer come, and my maid of honor just called me to tell me she is sick and can’t come. My mental health from this pandemic and losing family members this year is worse than it’s ever been. I’ve cried about it the whole week and things just keep getting worse and worse and the thought of having to look back on my wedding day and remember all of this honestly makes me sick. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’d appreciate any advice anyone can give me.

22 Comments

Latest activity by Katie, on August 31, 2020 at 10:28 PM
  • Molly
    VIP September 2020
    Molly ·
    • Flag

    You can try to postpone, but I din't think you would get any money back from your vendors. If I were you I would continue with your plan and make the best of it. Your wedding day will still be amazing! I'm sure you are very stressed but it will be worth it. You will be married to your best friend!

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    • Reply
  • Jana
    Master October 2022
    Jana ·
    • Flag
    Take a deep breath.
    At the end of the day, you're marrying your fiance so that's the light at the end of the tunnel. You can still have your wedding with just fiance, a couple witnesses for legal purposes and officiant. Then at a later date when the pandemic is not a concern, have a party to celebrate your marriage with those who couldn't attend.
    • Reply
  • Kelsey
    VIP September 2020
    Kelsey ·
    • Flag

    I agree with Molly. You probably won't be able to get your money back at this point. Plus if anyone is traveling they probably are busy making arrangements/ taking off of work. Just be excited and happy that you are marrying your FH!

    • Reply
  • Kathryn
    VIP August 2020
    Kathryn ·
    • Flag
    Girl, things go wrong. A lot of us are trying to get married in the middle of a pandemic. Our day was a mess: we had nowhere to have a reception because our venue wouldn't let us cut down to just the folks we would have, my husband was running around like crazy and only got to the venue like five minutes before the ceremony, my mom almost couldn't zip my dress, the dog was sick, my husband's family couldn't be there because they would have to fly, and the livestream only worked on facebook. Things will go wrong. But it was magical that my husband and I went through it anyway in order to have our day. It was seven people, super intimate, but that somehow made it better too. I know it all seems bleak, but have the ceremony. The truth is that pushing on is so worth it for those moments with your fiance. On the day, you won't notice what went wrong. You'll just have your moment of love with the perfect person.
    • Reply
  • Brenda
    Savvy August 2020
    Brenda ·
    • Flag

    I agree with PP. Things will go wrong, no matter what. My husband and I got married 8/8. We had a whole side of my husbands family fall sick from COVID and neither of our grandparents were able to attend which was heartbreaking. Things go wrong and we ultimately made the choice to keep going through it and I would not take that back because my wedding was PERFECT! This pandemic sucks but you work with what you got. Smiley heart at the end of the day, only you two know what you want to do or not. I was just happy to finally be married Smiley winking

    • Reply
  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag

    Look at your contract.

    i know for some of my vendors it said stuff like cancel x amount of days before and you get x% of your money back, etc.

    • Reply
  • JM Sunshine
    August 2020
    JM Sunshine ·
    • Flag
    My daughter and her now husband got married on 8/1 (after a postponement from June and a venue change) and due to the military travel ban their comrades could not attend (to include their officiant). My dad, her grandpa, stepped in to officiate and they married with 85 guests present. Their honeymoon to Kauai got cancelled so they went to Lake Tahoe, CA instead. Was it their original vision? No, but nonetheless it was beautiful and perfect in every way despite the circumstances. In the end, they married each other and that's all that matters to either one.
    • Reply
  • Kate
    Devoted August 2020
    Kate ·
    • Flag
    This sounds so much like the few weeks leading up to my wedding. My MOH couldn’t come, my godfather’s wife thought she had Covid so his whole family couldn’t attend, several others backed out of coming at the last minute. I cried and stressed and was super short fused. I will say this though...we pressed on and it was so worth it. I felt immediate relief after my ceremony, and just genuinely happy to be married. We enjoyed the day despite all of the setbacks and I am SO glad we went through with it. It’s a huge weight lifted off of our shoulders. My best friend even pre-recorded her MOH speech and they played it on a projector for me and it was amazing. It will all work out! You can do this. Best wishes to you both! 💕
    • Reply
  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
    • Flag
    I feel that 3 days is very short for your vendors, guests and for the 2 of you. Also remember that perfection doesn’t exist and this pandemic is out of our hands. So if you and your FH are healthy, then I would move forward with the wedding at this point. Things at this moment may seem crazy. But I believe that you’ll still have a great wedding day. I’ve seen many couples on here go through similar hurdles leading up to the wedding. But they return posting pics showing that their day was wonderful and completely memorable in a positive way.
    • Reply
  • K
    Beginner September 2020
    Kristalyn ·
    • Flag
    My maid of honor (my sister) can’t come either. So sorry. 😕. I’d ask your maid of honor what she thinks. If I were you, I’d just move forward and try to be thankful for who can come.
    • Reply
  • B
    Just Said Yes September 2020
    Brittany ·
    • Flag
    I needed to see this. My wedding is less than 3 weeks away and I've been worrying about all the people that have said or are going to say they can't come. I'm just hoping it's a good time for all the attendees in the end
    • Reply
  • Margaret
    Master October 2020
    Margaret ·
    • Flag

    You can certainly postpone if you want to... But here are my words of (hopefully) wisdom:

    This is hands down probably one of the worst years for every Covid bride and while your events are probably far different than mine, why make it worse by postponing your wedding. Salvage it, follow through and make it better.

    Marry your best friend, the love of your life and make this year a reason to say, "Hey, screw you 2020, you tried to beat me down, but you LOST - I STILL GOT TO MARRY XYZ! I WIN! WE WIN!"

    • Reply
  • Alyssa
    Beginner September 2020
    Alyssa ·
    • Flag
    You can try to postpone but also make it a bit virtual so those who are sick can "attend" as for the maid of honor maybe set up like a iPad or device on a tripod on video chat (just be sure to mute it) so she can be there for you (during toasts just put the mic up to the device speaker or you can even have her do a video or audio and send it to your DJ to play. A lot of hair stylist also have virtual backup plans so you can ask, but at the end of it all it's what you heart decides I remember a situation where the lady had gotten the flu and couldn't postpone and she said it made her closer to her guests cause she saw how much support she had, maybe that'll happen for you. Always hope for the best!
    • Reply
  • T
    Super April 2021
    Tiger Bride ·
    • Flag

    I disagree with PP, I wouldn't want to go through with it either.

    Normally 3 days is too short to postpone and not lose money...but in this world, who knows? If the bride or groom has been exposed to Covid a week before the wedding, I dare a vendor to say they have to go through with it - that's a lawsuit waiting to happen.

    • Reply
  • Alison
    Savvy August 2020
    Alison ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Wishing for the best for you 🤞🏻 This is such a hard time for everyone getting married. It’s been an absolute nightmare for me but I hope that anyone else getting married this year has better luck
    • Reply
  • Kimistar
    Dedicated March 2021
    Kimistar ·
    • Flag
    Check your contracts. I think it may be too late to postpone without losing all your money. Your caterer and cake baker may have bought all the ingredients to cook with and started prepping already. And your florist may have already ordered and received the flowers they’re arranging for your wedding. So the money you paid them might be spent already.
    • Reply
  • Yasmine
    Rockstar October 2020
    Yasmine ·
    • Flag
    Idk if you would get any money back from your vendors or if they would be okay with just moving the date. Are you not okay with just downsizing your wedding?
    • Reply
  • Evelyn
    Dedicated March 2021
    Evelyn ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Allison it is way to late to cancel!!!!! If you didn’t consider canceling March or April. Go ahead get married on your chosen date. Do your hair and do not worry about the things you cannot change now. You may have to pay 2021 fees at venue and your vendors May not be available.
    • Reply
  • JM Sunshine
    August 2020
    JM Sunshine ·
    • Flag
    Allison, we're dying to know what you decided at the 11th hour!
    • Reply
  • Alison
    Savvy August 2020
    Alison ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    We did it! And the day was absolutely perfect. All that anxiety for nothing.
    • Reply

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