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Patricia
Beginner May 2019

Is Honeyfund: Tacky or Not?

Patricia , on January 23, 2019 at 12:55 PM

Posted in Honeymoon 33

My FH and I are thinking about using HoneyFund as our wedding registry. Money is tight and we just don't think we can make a honeymoon happen. We have been living together for almost 6 years, and really have everything we need as far as household items. My parents think its somewhat tacky to be...

My FH and I are thinking about using HoneyFund as our wedding registry. Money is tight and we just don't think we can make a honeymoon happen. We have been living together for almost 6 years, and really have everything we need as far as household items.

My parents think its somewhat tacky to be asking for money for our honeymoon. They keep mentioning that we are more than likely to receive money anyway.

I know that times have changed and a lot of couples are choosing to do untraditional registries, but for some reason I can't shake their words.

33 Comments

  • Sydney
    Dedicated October 2021
    Sydney ·
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    I would also like to point out that research shows that spending money on experiences and travel rather than material items makes you happier.
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  • Michelle
    Champion December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    Asking for cash is always impolite and inappropriate. Many circles do not gift cash for any occasion, especially weddings.
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  • M
    Just Said Yes August 2021
    Maddy ·
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    I think it’s fine to do so. We made a registry and a honeymoon fund through theknot.com we asked for money for specific things like $100 for Sunset Dinner and $200 for Ziplining. We had a few people add money to this and a lot of people buy off the registry. It’s nice to have both in my opinion.
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  • A
    Just Said Yes October 2022
    Amira ·
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    So I’ve been thinking about this for my wedding but I have a question for those who think it’s tacky to ask. I understand that traditionally the wedding gifts were meant to help start the couple’s life but me and my hubby have been together for a while now and have everything we need. We are also looking to downsize and won’t have room for anything else unplanned. Is it still tacky to ask for no gifts at all? I want to say to my guests that gifts are not wanted (in a nice way) but if they feel like giving something they can contribute to a honeymoon fund or maybe an experience that we both want. Is it still tacky if you tell your guests you aren’t expecting anything from them? Please don’t be mean to me I really just want an honest opinion, thank you.
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  • Michelle
    Champion December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    Guests are aware that gifts are optional and do not need to be reminded nor should they. Be aware that if you don’t have a physical registry, you will receive gifts you don’t want and can’t return. Cash is not always the default. Think of it as a wish list of stuff you want and don’t want to spend your own money on. It doesn’t need to be all silverware and bath towels either. Do you entertain or have game nights? Do you go camping together or share some other hobby?
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  • Theadra
    Devoted June 2021
    Theadra ·
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    We had one in the sense that we lived together for 4 years ! So we had everything that we needed , plus we wouldn’t have storage for extra things if we made a registry. It just would’ve been too much. If needed something we could’ve just gone out and get it . To each it’s own , but it worked in our situation. 🤣
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  • A
    Just Said Yes October 2022
    Amira ·
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    So as I said before we literally have everything we need. We’re about to start traveling in an rv and don’t have room for any extras. I would rather people bring nothing at all instead of something that will sit in storage. Yes the odd person will bring something anyway but with Hispanic families it’s a little different. There is usually money given at the reception anyway but if I tell them no gifts with a good reason then most will not bring a physical gift. Idk I’ll figure it out when we get there I guess
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  • Rebecca
    Beginner September 2022
    Rebecca ·
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    I think family tradition/ cultural plays a huge factor here. As well as generation. I've noticed a honey fund or gifting money is more acceptable to some cultures than others. And as for generation, I'll give my own mother as an example. We come from a culture where giving money is common, but she still got a bit (unnecessarily) stressed about giving money through one of the options on Zola for a friend's wedding. Meanwhile my sister and I just shrugged and said, "that's the way it's done now." She's also pushing me hard to have more "physical items" on my own registry.

    So in summary, I would choose what to do based on who your own people are and what their cultural and generational norms are. OR just do what you want and do your best to be sensitive to people's hang-ups and expectations!

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  • J
    Just Said Yes April 2024
    Julien ·
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    For those who may be seeing this closer to 2024, do it, especially if you don't have a pressing need for items. I have things from living on my own and we didn't need the items from a traditional registry so we did a cash registry for the wedding using zelle. Not specifically for the honeymoon. We accepted cash and checks as well. It was very helpful and afforded us a lot of flexibility on how we can utilize the funds. In a proponent of doing what's best for your union. Some past comments may say it's tacky, but if it's what you need, do what's best for ya'll. We're happy with our decision.
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  • Tom
    Tom ·
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    IT'S TACKY AS ALL GET!!!!!! I SWEAR this new generation of young people! If you can't afford your wedding, then go elope! Traditionally the bride's parents pay for the wedding, family of the groom pays for the rehearsal dinner and a few other essentials, the groom plans and pays for the honeymoon or that is gifted by either the bride or the groom's family. A gift registry is normal and if you want to gift money great but never have, I been to a wedding where it was asked for a honeymoon or house fund. Seriously it's so beyond tacky and uncouth!!!!!! Those calling it not tacky are the very ones who either did this for their own weddings or plan on it. Not everything is a giveaway or a tip!!! In certain cultures, money is pinned onto the bride and groom or given as a norm but traditionally outside those cultures a gift is purchased, wrapped and brought to the wedding for the bride and groom along with family friends who do choose to gift money but it's nothing that is asked for by the bride or groom!

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  • Tom
    Tom ·
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    Patricia if you can't afford a honeymoon then I suggest not getting married. This means your hitching your star to a man who can't afford to take care of you much less a family. Unless you both are willing to forgo the honeymoon which is perfectly fine. However, I don't know any self-respecting man who asks strangers for cash so he can have a honeymoon. One of my friends had a beautiful ceremony, beautiful wedding gown with close friends and family. They had a gorgeous cake made by a friend nothing extravagant or expensive. They honeymooned for a weekend up in Destin Florida and drove there. Seriously it wasn't a trip around the world, but everything was beautiful and simple as they could afford it. This from a couple who had no parents to cover any expenses, but I will say this, they never asked for $$$ her and her husband had too much class. If money was given it wasn't requested in leu of gifts or anything else.

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  • J
    Just Said Yes July 2025
    Joseph ·
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    .Tom,

    ..how is a honeymoon fund any different from a registry which is, in your words, normal? "Not everything is a giveaway or a tip!" ???

    It's the same thing, a gift, given away, to share your love or at very least some feeling of affection for two people you know. Why does it make any difference if it's cash, a blender, towels, or money sent online?

    Would you be this mad if a couple asked for a BitCoin on their registry?

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  • C
    Just Said Yes May 2025
    Clarie ·
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    Y'all giving $50 as a gift to a wedding that probably cost 200+ a head is tacky.

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