Is bringing your own food as a wedding guest ok?

Can you eat beforehand? I don’t know her venue/catering situation, but I know if we had any outside food or beverages, our whole event could have been shut down.


That being said, can your boyfriend address your concerns with his sister? If it’s coming from him maybe she’d be open to a conversation.

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I might depending on if it's not allowed. She's getting married on the beach so I have no idea what the rules are.

Also, him and his sister don't talk so my only hope would be talking to their mother and having her relay the information.

I have celiacs and bring my own food. never had an issue. and one less plate to pay for. lol

That seems really inconsiderate of her not to talking to you about your allergies. We had a thing on our reply card for guests to tell us of any allergies or food preferences (vegetarian, vegan, etc.) and we made sure to accommodate those individuals. However, her venue might not allow outside food. Ours didn't.

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I'm not too sure about the rules of the venue since she's getting married on the beach and having her reception there as well. I'm hoping that I'm allowed since I have an allergy to soy and I'm lactose intolerant so...

I would bring your own food, yes. I also recommend eating beforehand.

View Quoted Comment Our venue was very accommodating to people with allergies. We had someone at our wedding who was vegan and allergic to nuts, but they were willing and able to accommodate her. We also had another person who had a gluten allergy and they accommodated her as well. If his sister was willing to talk to you then you could easily find out what the venue does for people with allergies, but it sounds like she's being unnecessarily difficult. Is she aware of your allergies?

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It makes me laugh considering she has food restrictions such as Celiac Disease and allergic to casein in milk. She knows that I have food allergies but as I was told on different occasions that my allergies are an "annoyance" to deal with and makes fun of me for having them. I think that if I'm going 10 hours away for her wedding, I should at least be contacted for my allergies...

Our caterer asked if they needed to accommodate any vegetarians, gluten free, soy free, seafood allergy etc., so I wouldn't think it would be an issue to accommodate your dietary needs! But you could always bring your own food, depending on the type of wedding. If it's black tie/formal plated dinner, I may would hold off on bringing in Chickfila to the table just because it would draw a lot of attention, and may would be a little obnoxious. But with it being pizza, I don't think it would be weird or an issue to bring your own!

View Quoted Comment Wow I'm surprised she is having pizza with Celiac Disease and is allergic to casein in milk. I would think that would kind of rule out pizza 🤔 But there is no reason to make fun of you because you are allergic. It's not like you asked to be allergic to these things. I agree that with traveling 10 hours the last thing you should have to worry about is a possible trip to the hospital or packing your own food. It sounds like your boyfriend needs to stand up to his sister and tell her that she shouldn't be so rude especially given that she has allergies as well.

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She is also 7 years older than me so I would think she would be more respectful than she is. My main thing is since I'm going to be 10 hours away and there for a whole week during a holiday for her, I should at least be able to decide my food. I wish he would stand up to her, but she fights with everyone so I'm just expecting to get yelled at in this wedding...

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I wish I knew if she even had a caterer/who they were! She's getting married on the beach and as far as I know, it's not too formal. Or at least I'm assuming since she's serving pizza.

Health and safety is always more important than etiquette, so OF COURSE it's fine to do whatever you need to do to not get sick at this wedding. Eat before hand and bring some safe snacks with you.

It sounds like the communication issues (the lack) are bigger than this wedding (you mention she doesn't even talk to her own brother) and this meal. Because of that, I would try really hard not to take this situation personally because, again, these sound like relationship/family dynamic issues, not a slight against your particular allergies.

It also sounds like you don't really like her, so it's also fine to decline to attend the wedding, especially since it involves quite a bit of travel.

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I've tried declining to attend the wedding, but unfortunately, I'm getting dragged along with everyone else who is going too since they don't want to go either. I'll be there for a week so I'm seeing it as a vacation because it's at the beach.

I talked to my boyfriend and he's going to ask her if it's ok for me to bring my own food. Fingers crossed she allows me to.

View Quoted Comment No is a complete sentence. If other people choose go that’s their choice.

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But what will you do if she says no? Hint, she can't literally prevent you from taking care of your health. It sounds like there are so many issues and ill feelings with this wedding all around ("no one wants to go"), that what do you have to lose by *not* going?

Why is your boyfriend going to the wedding of a sister he does not talk to?Why are you going with him, when you and the bride do not get along? A solution to the food issue is easy, and would properly be done after you receive the formal invitation, when she definitely has a caterer taking info. There may be multiple foods served, not necessarily identified yet.
Why you are going, that is the hard part to figure out.

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It sounds like she is rather immature even though she is 7 years older than you. It also sounds like she is rather inconsiderate of her guests.

No. Have your boyfriend mention the food restrictions to his sister. If she refuses to cooperate then decline. If they don't communicate, neither of you need to go in the first place. Obligatory invites have no business being sent to anyone and that trend needs to disappear fast.

View Quoted Comment This is my question as well. You can always decline an invite. Boy oh boy do I regret going to weddings I felt obligated to go to for people I don't particularly like