Inviting to ceremony only and not reception??

Only have the wedding you can afford.

Either have a small wedding and an intimate restaurant reception with everyone invited or push the date back .

Have your aunt or close family member be at the state park at the crack of dawn and reserve a pavilion. They are free, and you can have everyone bring a side. Easy Peasy. If my family was not so hoity-toity we would be doing this.

I was invited to a wedding like this last fall and only invited to the ceremony. I won't lie, it kind of hurt my feelings and I still wonder if it was to just get a gift out of me. But I went and tried not to have hard feelings

Don't do it. Have the people you can afford to host.

No, it's quite rude to do that. Only invite people to the ceremony who you can also invite to the reception.

My ceremony is in an area that is reserved so it will be costing us plus we are paying for the decorations, rabbi etc, the ceremony is coming out to about $900 but our reception is in a Country Club where we are paying about $65 per person. My date is already set and I'm not moving that back also if I did that I would let my friends know we are not expecting anything at all from them. Again the only reason I brought it up is because some of my friends have asked me for the address to the ceremony so they can at least go there. I'm just hesitant on doing that

Your wedding is next month and you haven't sent invitations yet?

Were you planning to have the reception at a different location than the ceremony?

Just tell them its an intimate, private ceremony. Its kind of weird for them to be so pushy about it, especially since it really would be inappropriate for you to invite them to the ceremony only.

Don't do that... I would be offended.

I have a list of 40 guests. We are only inviting immediate family and close friends. Those invited to the ceremony are also invited to the reception. Its not fair to only invite guests to one aspect of the wedding. It can also open a whole other can of worms regardless of what your friends say - someone always ends up hurt. If you let a few friends come, you might have issues with guests bringing others as well and have an even bigger problem. We're having a private dinner reception afterwards with all our guests and paying between $88-125 pp.

People will get offended. I find it rude to only invite people to one thing but not the other.

If you haven't sent out invites yet, I can tell you that you'll have less people for everything.

As much as I'd love to think that people want to come to the ceremony whether or not they get to go to the party, that's just not true. For many, they go to the ceremony because they get to have a glass of wine afterwards.

Don't do it.

I disagree with some people on here, I think if you have a heart-to-heart with these people and you talk to them about it, that is fine. Just tell them, "We would love for you to be at the ceremony, but, the reception is for family only because we are only allowed a certain amount of guests." True friends will understand and will be okay with it.

If I knew that there was a reception and I wasn't invited, I would not attend the wedding. I think it seems like you are just looking for a gift, even if that is not the case.

How is it possible you havent figured out your guest list yet? did you invite these people (the ones you are considering just having at the ceremony) already? That's a huge no-no.

I don't think she said she didn't send out invites. She said friends have asked for at least the ceremony address to attend (those I'm assuming who were not invited).

No. I understand you'd love to have them there but the point of the reception is to thank your guests for attending your ceremony, gift or no gift. If they can't go to both, then the proper thing to do is not invite them at all.

"Again the only reason I brought it up is because some of my friends have asked me for the address to the ceremony so they can at least go there." We understand that and it's a valid question. However, the proper response would be to say that although you'd love to have them you don't feel comfortable inviting them to the ceremony without being able to host them for the reception as well. Just my take on it.

Though I would not do this in general, I disagree with those that are telling you not to do it at all.

reason is because you've mentioned that you have friends that have told you that they would like to at least attend the ceremony. if they are ok with it and understand, then that's between you and them. I can't see telling them to stay home because you can't invite them to the reception if they are fine with it.

to avoid people bashing you. I would ask the friends to keep it quiet as to why they are only attending the ceremony. if they are friends I imagine they will tactfully do so.

the situation is a bit awkward, but If you have friends that understand that you have to fill the reception seats with the 'have to' people then work it out and don't beat yourself up.

I don't know the particulars of your reception location, but have you considered having a cake and drink reception? that's what I'm doing for the most part since it's not really practical to prep that much food at my dream venue. but then I don't have a nearby mom telling me what to do either. so if having a cake and drink reception can work for you, then maybe that's something to consider.

btw- if cake cost is a issue, then maybe look into a friend making one. if nothing else you can go with the trendy new look of a cake without frosting with flowers on top! a friend of mine had a wedding with a big pro made cake and a grooms cake. the grooms cake was put together at the last minute by the brides sister with factory mistake cakes and some kind of whipped cream topping stuff.

no one hardly touched the big cake, though it looked amazing in the pictures. they couldn't get enough of the 25 dollar quickly made grooms cake.

expensive doesn't mean better!

Guys it sounds like she already invited her guest list...she was unable to invite most of her friends...

i think if they're asking then it's not as big of a deal. my only concern would be if you have mutual friends who might be upset that THEY weren't included. you don't want to invite them to the ceremony because it's rude (no reception invite) and unlike these friends they haven't asked, but if they find out that some friends went to the ceremony and they weren't invited then they might be upset. so basically - if all of your friends from a particular group have approached you and asked to only attend the ceremony then i would probably give them the info.

No we aren't looking for a gift that's ridiculous, and yes the invites have already been sent out for our family members and they all RSVP by now. We didn't ask for gifts or make a registry and didn't even include any notes on the invitations. My ceremony and reception are already paid for but just deciding what to do.

Yes it would be terrible.