Inviting coworkers

I wouldn't invite any of them honestly. Work relationships are usually just that; work relatioships.

I hang out with about 5 of them outside of work. But not very often. This is a tough one! I guess I could just not invite any...

So glad you asked this question! Ours is a small office & I'm stuck! If we don't invite a few they will be offended but then I would have to invite everyone or it will look bad. I don't want to invite everyone! I'm thinking about none. That way it won't be so bad...I hope.

Well...if you feel they must be there, maybe just invite the few you are close with to the reception only.....and keep it confidential.

@Cynthia it's difficult because you have to see these people every day! Plus I've talked a lot about the wedding so I feel bad not inviting them.

Dont invite co-workers. Unless you hang out with them outside of work, don't.

I'm in this same situation. I do not talk about my wedding with my co-workers (anymore) but they did know when I got engaged. When they ask about the wedding, I say planning is going well and nothing further. I am honestly at a loss. Would I be happy if none of them came? Absolutely! Do I think it would cause tension in this small office? Absolutely. (That may be a reflection of my inflated sense of self...they may not even care).

I'm leaning towards inviting no one from work at this point and telling them that we had to limit our guests more than expected...which is true. (I have a big problem telling white lies. I'm a deer in headlights.)

@Allison stop talking about the wedding with them immediately. I think you have to do all co-workers or none. Since you are having to make cuts (like me) I say none. I know its easier said than done!

I'm in a similar boat! I work in a law office of 11 (including me). I decided to invite all 4 attorneys and their spouses (or SO) and not the 6 office staff. It's really hard because I didn't want to hurt feelings, and I enjoy them all, but I don't hang out with any outside of work.

My decision to invite the 4 attorneys was as follows: 2 of them are my bosses (1 of which is my FH's close family friend) so I felt they were necessary. I am only inviting the other 2 because I don't want to potentially hurt a professional relationship since the legal profession is so small.

If you hangout with some outside of work, they are totally cool to invite and not the others, but otherwise I wouldn't pick and choose unless you have a situation where you have equals and higher ups you feel must be included.

I'd say don't invite them. H invited some of his former colleagues who've become really great friends of ours. i am very close to a number of my colleagues and staff and would have loved to have some of them there, but it got too complicated to imagine inviting some of them but not all of them. it was easier to just keep them all off the list.

Personally, I am not inviting co workers. I am not friends with them outside of work, so they are really not part of my personal life.

I look at it this way, (Other than Facebook Friends) would I keep in touch with these people if I found a new job tomorrow? If the answer is no, or I would only keep in touch on Facebook, then No, I am not inviting them.

I am inviting my boss only out of obligation and she most likely would not go anyway, but the others are a no.

I just really try to keep my wedding planning and information to myself and not really share it at work, this also helps with that.

I plan on inviting 3 of my coworkers w/o their spouse. My boss keeps asking details and I am trying to be vague, don't want her thinking she is getting invited. Is that wrong?

@Kristin I read if you never met their spouse then it should not be required to invite them. The 3 coworkers would be seated at the same table.

@Allen & Tamika, spouses, fiances, and live in partners must always be invited per etiquette. any other SO is optional, but it can be very rude to pick and choose who can bring a SO outside of these conditions and who cannot.

Emily Post is super helpful with all this! I've got a tight budget too so I totally get it.

You dont invite anyone you wouldn't hang out with. I have some coworkers that I hang with outside of work. That's is all I am inviting.

Only invite those that you spend time with outside of work

For an office that small, I'd invite everyone. My old coworker invited our office (we were a smaller satellite office of a large cpa firm), when he got married there was probably 12 of us in the office. Yes, SOs were invited too. We had a one partner not come, but overall our office had a very familial vibe, and we had many non work get togethers randomly. Had I still worked for that firm (and not moved to another state) I would have invited that office. Honestly with it being that small, i would invite none or all.

ETA - my current job I invited three people I actually hang out with. The office is about 100 and 30 people in my department. I did. It invite my bosses nor did they tell me congratulations on my last day bbefore the ceremony or first day back from HM.

I decided against inviting co workers because I didn't want to start any drama by not inviting some and inviting others. But the general rule is to invite who you would hang out with outside of work.

I had the same issue so instead of giving invitations out at work, I mailed them to their home address. This way they knew I hadn't invited everyone which keeps them from talking about it at work.

I would invite the five you actually hang out with outside of work. It is less than half so it won't look like you are only excluding a few people.

If I was cutting my guest list, I'd probably cut them all (I feel like I've become a fairly brutal guest list chopper though) and would stop talking much about the wedding , except maybe to say I'm keeping the guest list small hah.

It really depends on your office dynamic but I'd say invite who you would miss if they weren't there. (In my case, I wouldn't really miss anyone bc I'll be so buried in family that I wouldn't have a lot of time for coworkers and I'd end up feeling bad )