Inviting Cousins?

He's probably assuming that you're inviting everyone, so it's worth it to bring it up with him and see what his thoughts are. If he doesn't care, then don't invite them, but if he does then you may need to invite all of them to just everyone from complaining and giving you grief about the decision.

We've had similar communications where someone assumed that family meant ALL family and didn't realize where we were drawing the line, and they assumed that "no kids" meant "kids that aren't immediate family" so they figured THEIR kids were on the guest list. Best to be as clear as possible from the get-go.

My FH has a large family with 7 siblings (all have grown children), and I have a small family. I think I invited about 50 people and he invited about 120. I'm inviting most of my aunts/uncles and cousins, except for one. My mom doesn't get along with her brothers wife and family and we haven't seen them in about 5 years, so they are not being invited. We get along with my moms sister and her daughter (another cousin), so they are being invited. Well my cousin is throwing a hissy because its too far, she has to have someone watch her children, and basically no one is taking care of things for her. Meanwhile my mother and her mother have discussed everything and come up with a plan which she doesn't like. My mom will reserve a room at the hotel for her entire family, and my aunt will bring her sister in law to watch the children or my mom will get them a babysitter. Well I received a message that she hates that idea, she will not have a stranger watch her kids, and will not drive out of the way to take her kids to her husbands parents house. I resisted telling her to not bother coming then. I know that my mom and I will be really hurt and we will probably never get along with that cousin if she doesn't come to my wedding. Just to give you some context, this cousin is married (I was in her wedding), she has 3 children, and everyone went out of the way to have a surprise 40th birthday party for her within a week of knowing. My mom and I have gone to all of her party's/showers and done everything that we can for her, but she won't commit. I'm not sure what is going to happen, but I let my mom know that I need to know if she is coming or not by Wednesday.

Not sure I am in the norm here, but I am inviting people who bring me joy and who have been constant in my life. Cousins I only see here and there? Old coworkers I talk to on FB? Forget it.

I have a rather small family now - no parents, two siblings, two aunts. I will invite their families, and the people who I spend most time with. Sorry, Karen, but since I haven't seen you in five/ten years, I won't be seeing you at my wedding, either.

I can only offer this: do what you feel you should do, not what others think you should do.