Inviting Cousin gf

A couple is a social unit and is invited together, by name. It does not matter if you have met both members of the couple or not.

Are you allowing other people to being girlfriends or boyfriends. Just because you never met her doesn't make her less real.

Anyone over the age of 18 who had an SO was invited with their SOs. Guests 21 and over were given a plus 1 if they were single. If I was told I couldn’t bring my SO of over a year to a wedding with me, even in college, I would have declined attending the wedding.

I would invite her, especially if they've been together that long.

I think she should be invited.

I disagree with everyone, but I definitely feel where you're coming from (except DC Bride up there, little intense - jk we love you DC Bride). Thanks for the comments!

Invite her, we are inviting all couples together as a unit.

View Quoted Comment GGGGGGGG-unit (sorry couldn't help it )

I know people are passionate about plus ones, but I think you should definitely invite her to the wedding.

I am personally giving everyone a plus one, especially people out of town. Regardless if I met them or not, I think it is the polite thing to do.

Personally, I think it’s awkward to meet s/o’s for the first time at weddings or family events. When FH’s sister got engaged, we had been together for about 5 months and I wasn’t invited to the engagement party. I understood completely and I’m also very shy so it would have been stressful meeting everyone for the first time. However, if you want to extend an invite, it would be nice. Then, you can arrange to meet them before the wedding.

View Quoted Comment Thank you for responding in such a calm, rational way. Obviously we don't agree, but what a great forum

I would have invited her since she is a longish term partner but I think it was pretty rude of them to ask if she can come. They may not have liked your decision to not invite her but I hate when people second guess a bride's decisions.

That being said, I think you should just let her come especially if other people are allowed to bring their SOs she shouldn't be excluded just because you haven't met her.

View Quoted Comment

Lmao, idk why but I feel like this just made my morning.

View Quoted Comment Just tryna inject some comedy into this oh so super serious discussion

Your adult cousin has a SO. They should be invited together.

View Quoted Comment I am sorry if I came off as rude, I meant that in a joking way. But in the end, this is truly your call. Best of luck to you.

I would definitely invite her. She’s been around for a while. If not now at what point does she get to come? Eventually the “we don’t all know her” excuse (not your excuse, just an example) becomes more fault than excuse— of course no one knows her, she doesn’t get invited to stuff! (Again not saying this is you— just giving an example for other people following along thinking it). Your cousin will be happier if she’s there, it’s a great time to welcome her to the family.

A PERSONAL ANECDOTE: I like this story because I think it sheds some light on relationship dynamics and legitimacy to the ol’ College Girlfriend.
When I was in college, along with my 2 male cousin peers, we all were invited to a wedding (no plus ones). I was single so not grossly offended, but both the boys had girlfriends. One of the boys’ sisters couldn’t come, so they brought the GF in her place (not totally okay, for sure — but I think it was approved by the couple in a “doesn’t affect our numbers, whatevs” kind of way). So, one GF got to come, and the other didn’t — grossly offending the one cousin and his GF.
Guess what? It’s 10 or so years down the road .....both of those boys are MARRIED to those college girlfriends. The one that didn’t come DEFINITELY still holds a bit of a grudge 😱
(this story is one to go against the argument of “ehh it’s just a college fling” which again I don’t think you are making haha— but more a lesson for everyone in general)

View Quoted Comment No I was being totally serious! (I guess it's hard to write a compliment when I'm actually not being sarcastic).

Yours was one of the few comments that was not just (internet) yelling at me to invite. So I was just thanking you. For serious, not sarcastically.

HAHAHAHA okay!! I felt so bad. I’m glad we are on the same page.

Here is the thing, everyone has a different situation and different reason why they should and shouldn’t invite plus ones. Mine was cost, then my mom told me I should invite everyone’s plus ones. (Guilted me into it)

When my rsvp came in with a few declines I was relieved hahaha.

I wish you the best, and I know some people on here are passionate about what they believe is right, but you got to do what you have to do.

Couples are considered social units and should, generally, be invited together.