Invitation wording

I think a lot of that is overkill - I wouldn't list attire on your invite unless it's black tie, and I think I'd go with the more basic timeline of the ceremony start, reception to follow, and send off. Other details can be put on your website - an FAQs page is great for this. You could list the menu there, and put some info about attire. Festive attire makes me think that some people would show up in Christmas sweaters. Definitely google some wedding style guides, but we went with casual cocktail on our website because we were wanting something similar to cocktail attire, but are ok with slacks, khakis, and no jackets/ties. You really shouldn't have to spell things out, but I know personally that I looked up "cocktail attire" for the last wedding I attended and was a little surprised with the technical definition, so I wanted to provide more information for my guests who have the same thought.

1.) You shouldn’t mention attire on your invitation unless you’re hosting a black tie or white tie event. The invitation and venue should convey the formality of the event. If you really must dictate your guests attire, mention it on your website.
2.) Your guests don’t need a timeline. Put the ceremony time and “reception to follow.” That should be enough.
3.) It’s extremely rude not to accommodate dietary restrictions. Like other things, I would mention this on your website. Unfortunately, most people with restrictions are used to navigating these inconveniences.

View Quoted Comment I agree with all of this.

View Quoted Comment We don’t have a wedding website and I have a lot of older family members that wouldn’t be able to navigate a website. But thanks for the feedback! I totally agree, cocktail attire is confusing to me. And I was totally worried about Christmas sweaters too lol! I like casual cocktail though. That might work! Thanks!

View Quoted Comment 1. I really am not trying to dictate specifics, but my fiancé’s family has a lot of people who basically live in jeans and a t-shirt and showed up to his cousins wedding looking like they just got done doing yard work. I just want people to dress for a wedding.

2. Definitely leaning towards the short and sweet version. I had just seen where so many brides on here included a detail card they gave an entire timeline and it got me thinking.

3. I am not intending to be extremely rude. But I cannot afford an entirely different menu for the one person I know who is gluten free or the few that are keto dieters, etc. I follow a keto diet regularly and I never expect others to alter their menu for me. If I know they aren’t serving something i can eat I just eat before. With most things, I find it rude to have that bridezilla attitude of “my day my way I don’t care about what my guests want”. But this is the one thing I won’t budge on. If I’m spending $2,000+ to feed people, I feel like the few that have dietary restrictions should understand and adjust.🤷🏼‍♀️

Also, we aren’t doing a wedding website. We have too many older family members that wouldn’t be able to navigate it and personally I just feel like most people don’t care enough to go through a website looking for what to wear, etc.

View Quoted Comment Yes, yes, and yes!!!

Tell your people to spread the word that it’s business casual, which means NO 👖!

As far as attire goes- if it means that much to you, I would note that it is cocktail attire or business causal. I didn't specify in my invitations, but I also didn't feel like I needed to. I would say do what you want- its your wedding!

I would only put ceremony time and reception to follow on the invites. We chose not to do individual programs, but are going to do a program mirror at the bottom of the aisle that lists everything on it. One of my bridesmaids had a chalkboard sign at her reception that had a list of times.

I think the food is overkill. My food is almost $7000, and there are tons of picky eaters on my guest list. One of things we did was to have one person's meal already plated that had certain dietary restrictions. This way, he was able to be accommodated but we also didn't have to change our whole menu. I would go that route if you for sure know someone who cannot eat what you are providing. Most caterers would be happy to accommodate you!

View Quoted Comment I’d be careful of the word “casual” in any form if you want dressy. Even with another word, people will get hung up on the “casual”

There’s a BIG difference between dietary preferences and ALLERGIES. No one is expected to cater to the whim of every picky eater , but, that’s a choice on the eater’s part, unlike in an allergy situation where someone could die. I’d say including a menu is overkill and definitely unnecessary but tbh if you’re not going to provide allergy friendly alternatives at all, I’d prefer to see a menu ahead of time and know to decline the event if I wouldn’t be able to eat anything at all.

View Quoted Comment I'm probably going against etiquette, but on my invitations I'm putting semi formal- no jeans. I know there are people that would show up in them-no matter how fancy the venue is. Not everyone gets the hint, I've seen it on several other discussions, and I see nothing wrong with it. I'm paying a lot of money for a nice wedding, I want my guests to look nice as well. It won't hurt certain ppl I know to wear something nice for a couple hours. And if it's that big of a deal, they don't have to come 💁


I'm not doing a wedding webpage, I don't think anyone I know would go on it and it seems pointless. I wouldn't worry too much about the timeline but I have seen some invites with the minimum details. Like wedding is at __, cocktail hour at ___, reception to follow at __.


I'm also not doing a whole separate menu for people who are dieting or anything like that. Not being rude either but as you said, you're paying lots of money for food, I'm not going out of my way to pay extra. There will be plenty of options anyways.


Hope that helps! You're not the only one doing things way

View Quoted Comment You just made me feel so much better!! I honestly just came here for opinions and a lot of these people have been less than understanding.

My fiance’s family wear whatever they want no matter the occasion. Normally I couldn’t care less. But it’s frustrating to put thousands into a wedding and then people show up in t shirts and jeans - and they did that at his cousins wedding.🤦🏼‍♀️

Wedding website seemed totally pointless to me too. No one looks at them. And that’s one more thing to worry about. i have seen so many invites with all kinds of details. Like who the MOH is, what their pets names are, just a bunch of irrelevant things but I was on the fence about a timeline. I do like the bare minimum details idea though.

The way I feel about the food is that beggers can’t be choosers. Lol. We have plenty of options as well and we’re giving you a free $20 meal. If for some reason you can’t/won’t eat what’s provided, by all means, don’t eat it.🤷🏼‍♀️ I don’t mean that as harshly as it sounds. But as a guest, I would never go in with the entitled attitude that they should cater to my eating habits.

View Quoted Comment

Yeah, I know what you mean. Sometimes I hesitate to post on here. You're definitely not alone! I shudder at the thought of people showing up in jeans and a t shirt lol And if I go to a wedding, I don't expect anyone to make special meals just for me based off my diet. Like you said, if they won't/can't eat something, don't. I probably sound harsh saying that in real life though lol We'll have options, they won't go hungry