Invitation Proof to Approve - Black Tie Optional Line Etiquette?

You will receive polar opposite opinions on this one.

Etiquette experts will tell you that
1. Black Tie optional is not a dress code. Your event is either Black Tie, or it's not.

2. No dress code other than Black Tie should ever be included on an invitation.

Black Tie is the exception because it conveys a lot of information about the event to the guests: valet parking, hors d'oeuvres passed by white gloved waiters, multi course plated meal with wine pairings, a live band, open bar with top shelf liquor etc . None of that is optional.

I think it looks great where it is, if it was in the corner it would look off! Everything is centered and clean. I love the font with Navy!, there's no indication of reception so I assume you are adding reception cards?

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Interesting! Did not know any of this. I've probably received 6 or 7 invitations that say Black Tie Optional. Knowing that for the most part that means it's a more formal affair, bridesmaids and female family would typically be in long dresses, groom and groomsmen in tuxes. I guess I've never been to a traditional black tie event with white gloved waiters.

In my case, the dress part of black tie is what we're doing. My dress is pretty formal, my bridesmaids are all in long gowns, same with our moms. My FH is in a custom tux, groomsmen in tuxes. To me black tie optional meant if you'd like to dress as formally as us, please join! But it's not required to get in door. We will have parking, passed hors d'oeuvres, multi-course meal, live band, open bar, etc. Whenever I've seen "black tie optional" I've understood that's what it kind of signifies. If I ever got one that said "Black Tie" I would know to definitely dress as formally as possible. Hmmm, lots to consider! Thanks for answering!

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Thank you SO much! I'm glad you can see it's navy. It's a midnight navy so I keep getting worried it's indistinguishable from black. I loooove them. And I do agree that I like symmetry

Yes! Separate reception card. Thanks so much for weighing in!

Hi Alexis! In terms of positioning, I think the text fits perfectly in that location!

It looks great where it is!

My wedding is pretty formal as well and I did not list attire anywhere on the invite. The only place it’s listed is on my wedding website. Guests should be able to figure out attire from the venue, time of day, and formality of invitations.

I disagree with the WW community on this one -- I think black tie optional conveys exactly what you said it does. And I think it looks good where you have it, I wouldn't move it to the corner.

View Quoted Comment But black tie hosting isn’t optional. You are hosting a black tie wedding or you aren’t. You wouldn’t tell someone your party is cocktail attire optional or casual attire optional. Same goes for black tie. Black tie optional sounds like you want everyone to dress all fancy for your party but you don’t want to host at the highest level.

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Except you don't want everyone to dress all fancy. It indicates that it's a fancier wedding and you're welcome to wear a gown or a tux if you'd like.

You wouldn't say cocktail attire optional because that's typical attire for a wedding.

I understand what you're saying, I just don't necessarily agree with it. I think this language has become common enough that people know what it means. And I think someone putting this on their invitations is likely hosting a fancy enough affair, even if they don't have wine pairings with every course.

The only acceptable "dress code" to cite is Black Tie, which is a lot more than a dress code and is a promise as well as a requirement. This has been pointed out repeatedly above.

I view "black tie optional" as indicating it is a black tie event (as far as what to expect from the hosting) but male guests may choose to wear either a suit or a tux. The "optional" part has nothing to do with the hosting level of the event, but rather, whether the gentlemen wear a tux or not. Usually when this dress code is indicated it is stated "formal, black tie optional."

Thank you for weighing in! I think that wording could be a good kind of compromise. I think it's super interesting how verbiage like this has morphed over the years. Thank you everyone!

Funny, I see attire on invitations all the time and always thought you should do so.

But Emily Post says not to http://emilypost.com/advice/formal-wedding-invitation-wording/

Yet just about every other wedding website says it's okay to:

https://www.theknot.com/content/wedding-invitations-etiquette

https://www.invitationsbydawn.com/content/wedding-dress-code-wording/

https://www.brides.com/story/invitation-clues-help-guests-guess-wedding-attire

https://www.basicinvite.com/help/wedding-stationery-etiquette/wedding-attire-wording-for-wedding-invitations

https://www.marthastewartweddings.com/228634/wedding-invitation-wording

I guess to each their own at this point?

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Oh thank you for all the links! I've definitely seen a ton of varieties of attire on invitations. To me it doesn't say "dress this way or you're not welcome" it's more of a courteous "this is the vibe and what most will be wearing" kinda thing. I know I've dressed all wrong for a wedding before (went way too formal) and I felt super dumb. Sounds like as with a lot of other wedding things, it's all changing! Thank you again for commenting!

Black tie isn’t optional. Are you hosting a black tie wedding or a formal wedding? If you just want your guests to dress formally, convey that on your wedding website. Don’t put a dress code on your invitation.

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The difference is explained by etiquette site vs wedding site. Wedding sites say whatever their sponsors and vendors want them to say. They make money off them.