Insane Cost of Weddings

Have a nice dinner at a restaurant. Weddings are expensive and if you want to keep it simple, just stop complaining and have a nice wedding reception.

If vendors started charging like lawyers we would all be screwed. Just think how many times you have emailed, called, texted etc a vendor either before or after you book them. Answering your questions and concerns is work and billable hours. And the price reflects all this behind the scenes work done before the big day.

I agree with pps, if you don't want to pay an "insane" cost, don't. Weddings cost what you make them cost. If you'd rather save money for something else, do a courthouse ceremony and take your parents out to lunch. But if you want a 200 person party, then you're going to have to pay for it.

Costs are crazy. Throwing a small wedding. For the venue, food and alcohol, my costs will be about $2500 for 30 guests. I am thrilled to be getting out so cheaply. But I also planned a Sunday noon wedding for that reason.

Yes agreed it's too damn expensive but I'm still going to go all out.

If you're willing to spend $4k on flowers, spending $4k on flowers is, by definition, not overspending. If somebody who wasn't willing to spend that on flowers spent that on flowers, sure it would be. But that should not be how your wedding planning goes. You buy what you're willing to pay for and nothing else.

I am in a profession where people complain that I am not worth my (relatively measly) salary, so I am not one to question another's worth in this way. However, I am a little annoyed that I looked at a make up artist and the fee for a regular make up session was $65, but bridal makeup for the same services was $175 (without going to the site, btw). I will probably do my own makeup, but might just make an appointment for a regular if I decide to do it. I have noticed this wedding markup with different types of vendors. Why should catering a wedding cost more than catering a birthday party? I looked for venues that were not primarily in the business of doing weddings and found them fair and not committed to the up sell. I would say, though, that there can be room for negotiation - I have negotiated a number of things including rent. I personally do not even try to negotiate with artists, because they get paid less than they are worth way too often.

But other than that, I think we're convinced we need a lot of things we actually don't. So the market adjusts. That goes for a lot of things besides weddings. But in this instance, we have been sold on replicating an upper class display of wealth in our weddings and there are plenty of people who willing to sell it to us.

After everything is done being paid for my wedding is about $45k. I have a big family and this is normal for the girls. I think even for our area we are about 10k over average. I am honestly having my dream wedding though. It's also a two day party lol

1. I think the associated events (bachelorette parties, day after brunches, etc) have gotten out of hand. Fine if you can afford. Not obligatory. My grandmother told me in her day, no bachelorette party, the MOB gave a luncheon for the bridesmaids, typically at her house. My mom told me it was typically a girls night out at local bar. Now, listen to the stories here. Weekends away, etc.

2. I agree with pp that some venues can take advantage of inexperienced brides. Do your research or you get along with your mom, get her involved. Understand pricing before you fall in love with a venue.

3. I think one reason that venues charge more than weddings is because it is a one off event. If they are bidding for a reunion or corporate event, they may hope it will be an annual event, and significantly less planning will be needed in future years, they will just go with what worked for all the first time. As to per person alcohol pricing, I also think that people drink more at weddings. Many people on diets splurge on weddings, not the same for reunions, etc. Venues understand this.

I agree with others it is possible to host a small wedding (and if I were looking at a wedding in the 35k range, I'd abandon the whole idea and go to Las Vegas. ) I also didn't include my wedding dress in my wedding budget because it was more of a gift to myself, and I worked my ass off to be able to buy it and pay it off. (plus I had it before we dropped deposits on anything else. ) I don't think the prices are OUTRAGEOUS but again depends on where you look, and where you live. My venue if it was closer to NYC, NJ, Philadelphia area would probably be a 50K wedding easily. It is all inclusive and is 90 a plate (buffet style and full open bar, and it's a hotel.)

Yes, our budget is only between $2-4k not a lot I know, but it is what it is! I am making my own centerpieces for the reception, and flower arrangements. I'm actually going to grow the flowers I'm going to use in the wedding at home. I also found a photographer for 4 hours who will shoot the ceremony and all the reception normals such as cake cutting, 1st dances, boquet/garter toss and some pics of the wedding party and my FH and I for$375!! I find a local church with a reception hall in the basement and it's $700 for 6 hours which also has a full kitchen. We are having it catered by a local caterer and we are having a pig roast and they're only charging $8/person ( meat only) but We're making our own sides since we have the full kitchen ( thank God). I'm not worrying about table linens, and dinnerware, people will not remember those things! What they will remember is the food and that they had a great time! We will be offering beer and wine, and I also found a DJ for$400 for unlimited hours. There are definitely ways to cut corners you just have to work a little harder and plan plan plan!!

I agree with many posters: it is all about where you live and how big a shindig you want to have; plus any gathering costs money. Heck, my son's open house in June was a few bucks, but hey, you invite people, you feed them and want to have a nice gathering. Ours is a small affair, 44 people total, venue is $500 (less than most, I know) but overall our bill is about $2400. Not bad! ($300 for musician at reception, $1000 food bill, $150 flowers, $500 photography, the rest is misc) We don't care about photo booths, favors, lots of the things first time brides may want. Know what you want and what you don't want and pay for the things you want.

I agree. The average wedding is insanely expensive for a but a moment of time. For what some spend you can make a down payment on a house! We're putting on our wedding for about $4000 all together. We've kept the guest list small, lots of diy, and people offering to help in their own way as their gift, and it has been feeling good and working out well. Even though we aren't using a lot of vendors, when I would inquire about rates and availability, I would just say it was for a party and not a wedding to avoid the wedding upcharge that you were referring to.

It is not armed robbery. No one is holding a gun on you.

In Florida, a marriage license costs $93.50. To get married at the courthouse is an additional $30. So, for less than $125, you can accomplish the same as spending thousands and thousands of dollars -- you'll be married at the end of the day.

But, you want to get married at a pretty venue (decorated with gorgeous flowers) on the day and at the time of your choice. You want to wear a beautiful gown or tux. You want 10 of your best friends standing by your side. You want 300 of your nearest and dearest to witness your special day. Well, you need to properly host them with delicious food and beverages.

And, I do not recommend lying to your vendors. If you asked me to come to your home 'to notarize a document' -- you're liable to get me in jeans with no make-up and no ceremony on me!

So true! And depending on what part of the country your wedding is being held, prices can be totally out of control! What gets me the most is how much prices can vary just from having a Saturday vs. Sunday wedding....or daytime vs. night time. But thats the law of supply and demand for you

Is the wedding industry a highly profitable business? It sure is. Read the book “One Perfect Day” that explains how we’ve all been targeted since we were little to have the dream wedding and how companies are able to tap in, and get you to pay crazy prices.

With that being said, we did the big Long Island wedding. For a lot of cultures in certain regions, your wedding is more of a point of pride for your parents than you, and many save up thousands to have this rite of passage as a family.

Do I think a lot of places overcharge because it’s a wedding? Yes, but it’s market prices. They can only charge us what we’re all willing to pay.

I have struggled with this same issue. I do not understand why my chicken picatta as one of the choices for food is $78 a person when I just went to a 4 star restaurant where the chicken picatta was only $28 a plate. Even with a gracious gratuity, that is no where near $78 just for food, not including alcohol.

But believe me, I agree you get what you pay for so I am going all out on my wedding. Never in a million years did I think I would spend 20 grand on my wedding, but thats about what its going to be.

The insane costs are high because couples expect so much more today than they did 20 years ago or more. Today you must have the photographer for hours and hours. Years ago, the photog did some pre-wedding group shots, the wedding and family pics after. That was it. There was no cocktail hour. Many, many weddings were cake and punch, not dinner and dancing, fancy lights, a DJ, charger plates, late night snacks. There was no photo booth, no videographer and decorations were much simpler. The reason weddings are so expensive is because everyone bought into the idea that a wedding isn't complete without all this shit.

I'm having a backyard wedding on my family's ranch.Approximately 200 guests. $6k wedding?: CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.