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RaylaSan
Expert February 2021

I'm tired of feeling like a villain just for wanting to have a wedding

RaylaSan, on January 19, 2021 at 1:51 PM

Posted in Community Conversations 26

My wedding is in 25 days, and I honestly thought it was gonna be a tiny bit easier to handle, since everything planning related is done, and now all I have to do is just finish up with last minute payments. However, collecting RSVPS have been an uphill battle, and I have really been slowly losing my...

My wedding is in 25 days, and I honestly thought it was gonna be a tiny bit easier to handle, since everything planning related is done, and now all I have to do is just finish up with last minute payments.


However, collecting RSVPS have been an uphill battle, and I have really been slowly losing my insanity. I've already sent out RSVP reminders, reminding people to get their RSVPs in by the deadline, and I made sure to make a point to mention to everyone that my fiancée and I are doing everything we can to ensure the safety of our guests. I even made sure to make a point in mentioning all over our wedding website, insuring guests that we're doing whatever we can to make it as safe as possible.


While many guests that have RSVPed yes are looking forward to it, I can't help but think of the small minority that are against it.


My parents have made it a point to paint me as a villain for still having my wedding. I've already accepted the fact that they aren't going, and I've made peace with it, BUT I don't know why they have to go out of their way saying I'm a horrible freaking person, the worse kind of trash alive, literally to the point that their blaming me for COVID. It's gotten so bad that I don't even talk to them anymore.


Now, while we're in the midst of collecting RSVPS, and some guests who declined going, for some reason made a point telling my fiancee and I that we're making a mistake, and that we should just cancel. Listen, I don't mind if people RSVP us "NO", I understand and I get why they won't feel comfortable with going, but nothing bothers me more than the guests that decline their invitation, and think it's appropriate to say something like "Congrats, but I think you're making the worse decision of your life and you should cancel".


Now even my future MIL is voicing out her concerns, encouraging us to just have a tiny wedding now, and have the reception later.


I just wish they'd understand that it's too late for that. Our venue won't allow it, and if we cancel, even postpone our wedding now we're losing over $10,000. In the first place, I don't want to postpone, I don't want to cancel. I have been so depressed lately, and the only thing keeping me going is the wedding. It's the only thing I've had to look forward to, the only thing keeping me going, and I wish people understood that. It's not something a professional can help me with, It's not like I can just go up and cancel everything one month out, and lose literally all the time and money we've invested. I'm not that strong of a person.

26 Comments

  • Katie
    VIP August 2021
    Katie ·
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    I'd just ignore the haters if I was you. Me personally I'm the type who would tell them off. If these people were in your situation what do you think they would do? I'll tell you what they would do they would go forward with the wedding. People are selfish hypothetics. They will tell you how horrible you are and wrong it is that your going forward with your wedding but then go and have a big football party or go drink it up at a party where nobody is following regulations.


    Girl there is absolutely nothing wrong with going forward with the wedding. You are not a horrible person nor are you making any mistakes. Don't listen to the sheep who are trying to knock you down.
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  • Katie
    VIP August 2021
    Katie ·
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    Thank you, I couldn't agree more
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  • K
    Dedicated January 2021
    Kimberly ·
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    Invite extras because many people are saying yes and then literally not showing up and not even giving warnings. When questioned, they use covid as an excuse
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  • Katie
    VIP August 2021
    Katie ·
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    I fourth this ❤️ you are going to have a beautiful wonderful wedding day. And you will make a beautiful bride. Don't let negative people try to pull you down to their level of sadness.
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  • Sara
    Savvy July 2021
    Sara ·
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    I was glad to read there's a good amount of people who have RSVP to you and will be there. Focus on those guests and roll with the good times. My fiance and I started planning ours back in May 2018 and we were supposed to have it on 5/30/20. Instead we did a 'minimony' that day. We've rescheduled everything to 7/31/21 for a vow renewal and will still be taking precautions and reassuring everyone on this. We're moving forward no matter what. The way we see it: it is what it is, Can't make everyone happy (it's your day, focus on the good), and whoeve
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  • Sara
    Savvy July 2021
    Sara ·
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    ***whoever shows up shows up. Don't lose yourself in bending over backwards for others. Lesson learned here is keep it simple, keep it affordable and do what makes you happy. If people don't like how things are then that's their problem 🤷 you enjoy yourself and congratulations!
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