I’m struggling—blended Family

I was never suggesting that the original poster who is about to become the stepparent should correct the child. I was suggesting that the father correct her. Laughing at that behavior is not okay.
We will just have to agree to disagree. I stand by my opinion. I respect yours, but I disagree with it.
Have a great weekend.

Well I’m a mother so my best advice is to talk with your future husband and also have a talk with her and try to understand where this is coming from. But I’m 💯 sure it’s from her mom and her feeling as if she has to be loyal to her mom because liking you and showing it would be disloyal to her mom, sounds crazy I know but she is a child and she only imitates what adults do it starts at home. I would say talk with her spend a little 1 on 1 time with her I’m sure she’s feeling territorial with her dad or it’s the mom with the negative comments in which she’s picking up

I'm a childless 44 year old getting married to a slightly younger man with 2 boys. One is 14 from a previous relationship. The other 9yr old is a mini-me of his dad and his mom is the ex-wife. Very different women and parenting styles. He was a hot mess (drinking) back then. I've known them for 7 years and been a constant parental figure for about 4 years. The ex-wife, FH, and I group text on everything and it's like combining 3 different parenting styles but your vote is slightly less. It's hard being a step parent. Heck it's hard being a parent. You have to be willing to invest in those kids as though they are your own. Part of it is that everyone needs to be on the same page and support each others decisions or negotiate. The mom probably is influencing her attitude and possibly badmouthing you so the girl is in an impossible situation. Maybe she needs more attention from her father. That's a difficult age and she can probably sense your feelings towards her. Try to get on her level and pull her into something that is just with the girls. Acknowledge that this situation might be awkward for her and that you are just joining the family but never trying to replace her mom or interfere with her relationship with dad. Maybe dad needs to get more serious about curbing these rude behaviors. Bottom line is that you need to be willing to take on the challenges, Joy's, and struggles with exes as part of the deal. We have parenting issues we work through and sometimes I'm the bad guy but I care too much about raising him right. I'm too old and busy for my own children so the half-time parenting is best of both worlds. She will come around but you have to guide the way and FH needs to set the tone. You are not alone and I feel your frustration. Good luck

View Quoted Comment Exactly!!! I’ve been a pre-teen before and wouldn’t dare be disrespectful in front of my parents. I don’t consider this normal behavior either..maybe for a 2 year old but not a 9 year old.

Please speak with your husband in private about this matter and maybe even seek counseling with your pastor.