i want to include one sister in my bp but not the other

Maybe have her do a reading?

Hey Karina! Welcome to the WeddingWire community! Congratulations on your engagement!

I’m sorry that you are feeling like this while choosing your bridal party.

You should choose your bridal party based on who you feel close to and supported by.

It’s important to remember that no one will be as excited about your engagement as you are, as hard as that is to hear, it’s true. Have you reached out to your sister to share your excitement and discuss wedding planning?

The role of a bridesmaid is to stand with the bride on her wedding day and buy their BM dress, all other tasks and activities are not mandatory, although a lot BMs offer to help the bride with different tasks.

At the end of the day, it is entirely your decision if you want your sister to be a part of your bridal party. It’s great that you still have time to think things over and not rush your decision.

I was kind of in a similar situations I have a 2 sisters one both from different moms. I have only one of my sisters in my bridal party. The other I’m not very close to and she also has some negative life choices. I’m sure my family expects her to be in the bridal party but I’m not having it. I love my sister, but I know my sister. Don’t feel bad if you don’t include her in the bridal party it is your day. Choose who you WANT to stand by your side.

I have three sisters. I don't live near any. One has a different mom and we didn't grow up together. But she is my sister and it's better For think to just have them in the wedding party then risk hurting feelings. I don't have a MOH I didn't want to cause problems by giving one person that label. I have a total of 7 and my FH is putting my 4 brothers in his plus his 3. It's a big wedding party but everyone is happy no one feels left out and at the end of the wedding I haven't done damage to any relationships they maybe the same as before the wedding but they aren't worse. Maybe ask your sister if she even has any interest in being in the wedding party.

I have one sister, and we are close but I didn't make her my MOH.

You can do whatever you need to make your day perfect. If she didn't help with the engagement party, it's hard to think that she would be involved in planning your bridal shower, bachelorette party, etc.

I’m not sure what you mean by she wouldn’t help contribute financially. She’s not obligated to pay for anything other than her dress, hair and makeup. And her only job is to show up in the dress you chose and stand beside you. If you don’t feel close to her don’t ask her, but I feel like your expectations of her are already way too high, based on what you’ve posted.

small back story: I have 4 sisters and a brother. I am the youngest of 6. My mom had two of my sisters from her first marriage and my other three siblings were from my dads first marriage. I am their only one together. (I promise this is important information).

This is completely up to you. You just have to be willing to accept the backfire of it (by no means saying this to discourage you). I originally decided when I got engaged to not have any of my 4 sisters in my wedding party. I have always been closest to my moms kids because we are closest in age ( 3 1/2 years and 8 years apart) my dads kids are upwards of 14+ years older than me. I wanted to include my sister thats 3 1/2 years older than me because we have ALWAYS been super close. I chose not to because I didn't want anyone getting offended. That sister passed away back in January (and damn I wish I had made her a part of my wedding party because maybe she would have pushed harder). After she passed away my other sister and I became very close. We lost our sister. My dads kids got closer too but they were much older and that was their step sister (and as crappy as it sounds they really took on the step siblings is not as important as real blood, which is stupid). So after my sister passed away I was having an issue with one of my BM and she backed out so I asked my other sister who is 8 years older than me to be apart of my wedding and its been great. My other siblings are a bit bothered by it (for reasons like bachelorette weekend and bridal shower, even though I invited them to both). But it didn't put a strain on any of our relationships.

long story short you just need to be prepared for whatever the outcome may be. You may need to explain to that sister that you guys aren't as close (which could be a difficult conversation). Just know that theres people out there that have done it and all things are fine! I don't know if theres really an etiquette for it. Family shouldn't HAVE to be included in your bridal party because they're family. it should be the people you are closest too. My FH says it best "Family is the people you choose to be in your life. I have no siblings but my friend circle, while smaller is my family. All my guys are my brothers. I CHOSE them to be my family"

You still have some time before you really have to decide on your BMs. Maybe ask her out to lunch or coffee and just chat, see where you two are at in your relationship outside of the wedding stuff. Something to consider in your decision would be what you want for your relationship in the future. If you want to grow closer, this could be a great opportunity.

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Yeah, or I was thinking of making her an honorary bm where she would walk in the wedding in any dress she chooses and wouldn't have the other obligations.

Have you reached out to her? A relationship has to go both ways. Also your wedding is almost two years away