Brief intro: FI is from NYC, I'm from Hong Kong, and we now live in N. VA. We're doing 2 weddings, 1 in US & 1 in HK. We're expecting about 120 people in each.
1. FMIL wants to have it in NYC since it's closer to her and her friends & family. I would rather do it in VA/MD since it's much closer to me, and I already have to plan another long distance wedding in HK. It's also a lot more expensive to have it in NYC. She said we would do it if we're respectful to her.
2. My parents have been clear that they won't help out financially. I'm not too surprised by this. what I'm most upset is that, my mom is going to invite 20-30 of her friends, and my dad said per Chinese customs, whatever wedding presents (they typically give money) from her friends would go to them. This does not make sense to me when we're paying for them to attend!
Not enough space to vent...see 2nd part below!