Private User
Beginner October 2019

i need to vent! i am unhappy with most of our wedding decisions.

Private User, on May 27, 2019 at 8:28 PM Posted in Planning 0 11
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Hi ladies and gents. I just need to vent for a moment. We are getting married 10.26.19 and so far I am not loving most of our wedding decisions. I really don't like our venue. We looked at so many of them, but they seemed so unorganized and all over the place. We found one that was really efficient and organized and we both "liked it enough" that we decided to book. I am not 100% on my dress, the more I look at it the more I am not convinced it is what I want. My daughter helped pick it out and really thinks it is perfect, but again I am not so sure. I purchased the dress for a great price, and it is beautiful; however, I don't know if it is me. I have no maid of honor, that has been a mess in its self. I have not been able to find bridesmaids dresses that will work for everyone. It just seems like there is one obstacle after the next. I totally feel like we have settled on most of the things because it seemed like the best idea. I am so excited about my marriage, but not so much about my wedding if that makes sense. Has anyone else felt this way? Is it normal to second guess all of the decisions?


11 Comments

  • Kelly
    VIP October 2020
    Kelly ·
    • Flag
    I think it's normal to second guess yourself.
    I know bridesmaids dresses are a huge Hassel for everyone so don't let that discourage you.
    Is there something you don't like about your venue specifically? Do you think decorations would help it?
    I went back and forth on my dress, then put it on the other day and realized I made the right choice. There's so much pressure to find THE dress I think it makes us second guess it a lot.
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  • Cher Horowitz
    Rockstar December 2019
    Cher Horowitz ·
    • Flag

    I'm so sorry you're not liking your wedding decisions! It helps to add your own personal touches to things like the venue and dress - find creative ways to make them uniquely your own! Decorations could really spruce up your venue, and you can add a beautiful belt to your dress - little things like that can make a huge difference Smiley smile

    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Champion March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
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    Hmmm... can you focus on one priority for now so there’s something you just love & are excited about? I’d not worry about the BM dresses. I think the dress may be the easiest... can you accessorize it or alter it so you’ll love it? If not, what about looking at a stock gown? I feel like loving your look will help (or book your hair & makeup trial then try on your dress).

    What don’t you like about your venue? Uplights are a cheap way to dramatically create ambiance. Perhaps focus on a small area of the venue you can love: create the most amazing sweetheart table or cake table (splurge on a fancy linen & decor).
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  • Bridget
    VIP August 2019
    Bridget ·
    • Flag
    It’s definitely normal! I second guess my dress allll the time! I just think back to how amazing I feel when it’s on. I have second guessed pretty much all of my vendors especially after hearing some recent reviews on my venue. The only thing I have not second guessed is my fh and my bridal party lol it’s Normal! Just take a deep breath and everything will work out. If you have room in your budget you could always look for another dress!
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  • Soon2Bmrsp
    VIP May 2019
    Soon2Bmrsp ·
    • Flag
    Pick a 1-3 bridesmaids dresses and let them choose to take the stress off you...for the venue, you can add decorations/centerpieces, etc to dress it up and as you get closer your nerves will get less and you will be more excited about the decision that you are making
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  • CDickman
    VIP September 2019
    CDickman ·
    • Flag
    I think we all second guess ourselves. I knew finding a dress that would look good on my girls would be hard so I just gave them a color. They are getting own dress.
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  • T
    Super June 2019
    Tiffany ·
    • Flag
    Omg I second guessed so many things. Hell I am 25 days out and second guess the entire thing lmao. Just remember to keep perspective: it is one day. Your lifetime of marriage is what matters. Focus on getting this one day over and remember that it’s like childbirth. It’s only the beginning. Probably just as painful for the planning 😂
    • Reply
  • Victoria
    VIP October 2018
    Victoria ·
    • Flag
    I definitely second guessed our venue! It's beautiful, but I really didn't think it was us.

    Until the day of. I walked in and it took my breath away. The coordinator there just killed it with the decorations I gave her. I couldn't have even pictures how beautiful it turned out.

    Trust me when I say, organized and efficient is one of the most important things, if not THE most important thing, to look for in a venue. We were sold on our venue for that very reason and even though I had doubts, if I had to go back, I'm 99% sure we'd choose the same venue again.

    If you're not sure about your dress then it's ok to look around to see if you can find something else. I know dress regret, I had dress regret and I wish I would've kept looking! But not being 100% in love with my dress didn't make our day any less special or make me enjoy it any less.

    For your bridesmaids, lots of brides choose a material and color from a certain manufacturer and let the bridesmaids choose their own style. Would that be an option you would consider?
    • Reply
  • Khalimah
    Savvy June 2019
    Khalimah ·
    • Flag
    I think it’s normal to second guess but you have to go with you first feeling. It will all work out in the end! Best wishes to you on your wedding day!
    • Reply
  • R
    Devoted October 2019
    Roxana ·
    • Flag

    Date Twins!

    So sorry you've been having a hard time. Honestly, I think society puts a very big strain on couples to have the "perfect" wedding. Not everything has to be perfect, nobody will notice but you!

    Think of your venue as a bare bones deal, they provide the structure and you provide the vision with all of the fantastic decor that you'll bring in!

    As long as you feel beautiful and comfortable in your dress, I'd say wait it out. You'd be surprised how much your opinion can transform once you have all the pieces in place. With hair, makeup, accessories, and an already beautiful dress I'm sure you will look amazing.

    Bridesmaid dresses can be tricky. If you're open to the mix and match trend that might benefit your bridesmaids more. If not, I suggest Azazie. They've got a great try on at home program to make things easier.

    Not every aspect has to be perfect. Just try and focus on one or two things that you really love and are looking forward to!

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  • Katelyn
    Beginner October 2019
    Katelyn ·
    • Flag
    I think it’s totally normal, I second guess myself on some things also. I think it’s because there is this idea that everything has to be absolutely 100% perfect. At the end of the day, you are going to look beautiful and you’ll be starting your lives together as husband and wife.
    As for the bridesmaids dresses, have you looked at Azazie.com? I never planned on having my girls order dresses online, but I have so many different sizes, shapes and ages that I wanted them all to feel beautiful in their own way without having to spend a fortune. I just picked the color and let them choose whatever dress they liked the best. If you want them all to be in the same dress, that’s easy too! They seriously have so many different dresses, and you can order a sample for $10!
    Good luck with everything!
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